Praise Jack

Written as response to prompt on Mass Effect Kink Meme: http://masseffectkink.livejournal.com/2320.html?thread=3751184#t3751184

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Jack, Supreme Bitch Goddess And Ruler Of All Life In The Universe, woke up and immediately knew that something was wrong.



It was nothing obvious at first.  As usual, she woke up in her giant bed in what were formerly the Captain's quarters, surrounded by her personal attendants, their naked bodies clinging to hers.  Seeing her rouse, they immediately began to service her.



"Praise Jack," said Garrus, running his hand up her body.



"Praise Jack," declared Thane, as he placed a gentle kiss on her breast.



"Praise Jack," Zaeed proclaimed proudly, being given the honor of servicing the Supreme Bitch Goddess's most holy of cunts.



She laid back for a moment, allowing the slaves' attentions to wash over her.  Their tongues covered every inch of her divine body, tracing the lines of the tattoos and scars that Jack had felt too sentimental to remove, even though in theory she could have willed them all away with a thought.



Sentimentalism accounted for so many things.  Like the fact that she even slept anymore.  She could have easily disposed of the artifact of her former human existence; after all, she had done it with every other lifeform in the universe.  It was much more enjoyable being a goddess when every one of your worshippers had 24 hours a day to praise your magnificence.



But it was still nice to have a rest, and every so often, her dreams weren't filled with pain, death, and blood.  And those were nice.  As was the orgasm Zaeed's tongue had just worked her to.



Still, though, she could feel it.  Something was off.  It puzzled her for a long time, even as she instructed her slaves to put on a show for her.  As the obedient men began kissing and pawing at each other without hesitation, she pondered these strange sensations.  She should know what this was all about; she was omnipotent, after all.  But it was just out of her reach.



Finally, she spoke up to her attendants.  "Are you happy?" she asked them.



"Of course, Goddess," said Thane, before returning Zaeed's cock to his mouth.



"Praise Jack," Garrus said, as he lined up his own rod with Zaeed's asshole.  "She has given us so much, and asks so little in return."



"Have we done something wrong, Goddess?" Zaeed said, his voice suddenly filled with fear.  "You're not going to send us to.. her, are you?"  The mere thought of it brought looks of terror to all of their faces.



"Please, no, Goddess," Garrus begged.  "Do you want us to please you again?  We'll do better this time, we promise!"



Suddenly disgusted, Jack waved a hand.  "Just... go.  I have no more use of you at this time."



Bowing to their goddess, the three men left quickly.  Probably terrified Jack would change her mind and send them down to Deck 4.  The mere mention of the number was enough to make any of her worshippers shiver.



Rising to her feet, Jack stretched and yawned.  Stepping around the bed, she strolled over to the aquarium and knocked on the thick glass.



"Morning, fellas," she addressed the small creatures darting around inside the tank.  "How you doing in there?"



"Your victory is only temporary, human," intoned one of the now 3-inch long Reapers that swam in the bubbling water.  "We will escape this pitiful scheme of yours, and your species will be eradicated."



"Love you too," Jack said, making a mental note to have Kelly come up and "feed" them with her divine gift later on today.  Pacing around her bedroom, Jack tried to work out what was bothering her this morning.



Her path took her to the small hamster cage on what used to be Shepard's shelf and was now hers.  Inside, a small fuzzy critter with the head of a salarian was frantically moving.



"Running in the wheel, very nice," Mordin's head said, his rapid-fire tone even more hard to understand in his new body.  "Good exercise, do it every day.  Now going to drink water.  Delicious water, very thirsty.  Now back to running in wheel.  Wheel is fun, love to run in it.  Now defecating in wood chips.  Ah, great relief.  Back to wheel now."



Sighing, Jack walked over to the closet and donned her ceremonial garb.  A long red robe that fit loosely around her, but thin and transparent to allow all to marvel at her divine form.  And open in the front for when the Supreme Bitch Goddess was in the mood to fuck.  Atop her head, she rested a solid gold crown, with precious gemstones inlaid across its surface.



It was only when she reached the lift and hit the button for Deck 2 when she finally realized what had been bothering her.



Jack, Supreme Bitch Goddess And Ruler Of All Life In The Universe, was bored.



As the lift slowly began its progress downward (power over the entire universe, and even she couldn't make these elevators go any faster), Jack's mind slipped back to several years ago.  How long it had been, Jack wasn't entirely sure.



Once she had laid her hands on the surface of that ancient artifact, time, and a whole lot of other things, stopped mattering.