The Argonian Maid?...Nope!

English is not my first language so bare with spelling mistakes and if something is named different in the story than it is named in the game.

I am writing for fun, they way i would see it plausible how the chars act and interact and ignoring or adding some things which i did not like and would have liked better in a different way.

I may see some NPC´s in a different light than you, so please do not see it personal if i stake your favorite vampire or bash Martin..or whatever else may come to my mind.

Sadly i do owe nothing, not the Elder Scrolls, not Morrowind or Oblivion and sadly also i am not the leader of the dark brotherhood.
But the main char existed years before Oblivion came into existence..i just transfered it in this scenerie and used terms from the game....like argonian instead of dragonian or lizard or whatever.

So have fun...and before i forget it..i used some more warnings then neccessary ..but they may be apply to further chapters.

Have fun


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This pounding in my head..ouch...with a growling sigh i try to sit up without making the pain and dizziness worse.
Where am I? Blinking I open my eyes, trying to adjust them to the strange light, damp light but still too bright for me..at least at the moment. My eyes tear up, but in the end I manage to open them and shush away the blur that hinders my sight.
-Oh..ok…WHERE AM I?- I scream in my head, still blinking but now because of my new environment..i can not get it in my head. It looks like…well..the rough stone walls, the iron shackles, the damp straw that smells mouldy and ..owww…..the torches which ad the distinct flavour of burning tar to the odour of…dungeon.

I frown disgusted and stand up from the straw which leaves its dampness on my scaly skin, trying to wipe the feeling away with clawed hands.
Why am I here? Dazed I scratch my head, still turning round and trying to remember. And not just why I am here…by the gods….
Now I am more confused, I can not even remember in which town I am, which country or..well..nothing. Not how old I am, my friends or family. Everything is wiped away and now I really dread what awaitens me here.
If I can remember nothing, how can I defend myself …what if someone needs a scapegoat and ..no…-Do not think further. Come on, think how you can solve this mess-

My nostrils flare as they catch the scent of the sewers which seem to be near. I gag when the foul vapour mixes with the one of a stew.
Throwing a look to the bared hole that is not worth beeing called a window I can at least tell that it has to be around noon.
There is not even a blanket in the cell and I am so damn cold, but my musing is interupted with the metallic clang when the keys are turned in the lock of the iron grill that keeps me here.

Nervously I step back, far away from the door and the guards that watch me. Not just watch me like I could storm away, like I could hex them to next morning and beyond.
The muddy looking stew slooshes , trickles over the wooden bowl as the guard drops it with a loathing glare. Strange which things step into the foreground of thinking when one is in such a strange situation. I can not tear my eyes away from the mess which is supposed to be food
The lound and angry sounding bang of the door startles me again..and then I am left here..with this bowl.,.the damp straw and the water that drips here and there from the walls.

-Why am I here?- and a depressed whine flees from me as I rub my face, my shoulders drop and I turn around again, throwing an angry glare at the bars through which the sun shines so…happily….mocking me.
Huffing I stalk to the bowl, careful not to trip over the rubble, hidden by the straw.

Unhappily my tail swishes from side to side as I stare and bend down to pick up the smeared pot and sniff at its contents. That´s just awful. I can not even recoginze what happend to drown in the bubbling liquid. Do they try to kill me of with this meal?
Ok at least I know I have no death sentence over my head because then they would serve me a better last meal..well I hope so. Or is this concoction my death sentence?


Sinking down on the stairs I hide my head behind my arms, resting it on my tights..and still me tails swishes, taps on the stone beside me. Forgotten the food which cools and turns to a sticky mass in the bowl on the stair where I sit. I can not find peace, not one clear thought. What happened to me, what?.. in the name of the Nine?

A sad, steady whistle flows around me and I realise that I am making this strange sounds. Yeah that’s me.. an argonian which sounds like a strange kind of bird…and then my head jerks up at this thought.
So immensely buffled I stare at my hand..or claw?
The palm smoot, nearly the one of a human but with claws and the backside scaly…and..feathers.
Small colourfull feathers which blend with the scales, grow in length in a small area up my arms, to the shoulders and when I touch me neck…yes even there are feathers down my spine when I try to catch a glimpse and see…on top of my tail there are feathers to and I can move them.
The move and twitch with my nervous thinking, my puzzlement and…-Gods..i am a strange Argonian.- Argonian, that´s what I am, or?
Scratching my scalp, combing through the hairlike feathers there ..what am i, a dark experiment? Are there argonian individuals with feathers?

I wish I could see me, but there is nothing, no mirror like surface from which I could gain more information
Even the iron shackles are too grimy, no chance to clean them..absolutely frustrating to know nothing, not even how I look.
There is nothing to do for me and I still feel so cold..and the draft here is doing nothing for me. If it would blow away this smell..but no, it just carries more of the foul dungeon odour, making my nose go numb with time and after some hours while i aimlessly moved around in my cell, I am no longer troubled by it.
Who am I kidding, I still can smell it and I hate it but I can do nothing against the sting in my nostrils, so I try to ignore the stench.

Back and forth and left and right and round and round. It is starting a crazy sing song in my head..round and round it goes..i walk faster until I run and only stop after the crazy feeling has left me, my lungs burn and I still feel the need to jump out of my skin. But at least I am not so cold anymore even when the chill got stronger with the time that flew by.
Now the stars twinkle madly in the sky and I just watch them, stare and blink and stare and sigh from time to time. There are no answers for me. Not in this cell and the stars wont answer me, they just seem to twinkle happily because…well..they are not caged.

And then the chill is embbracing me again, ushers me to curl up and preserve the warmth I have left in my body. The damp straw is no use, even if I would drag it in one pile and try to hide in between, there is just not enough there to do so.
So I ly there, wound up in a tight ball, hands balled to fists, toes curled up and my face hidden under my arms, resting on my chest, so at least the warmth of my breath will not get lost.
Sleeping when you are so damn cold is no easy task, the biting coldness in the air keeps you awake.
But at least, when the sound of breathing became my lullaby, my breath the only comfort, a warm caress even if so little, I succumb to sleep.

Loud metallic banging startles me from my sleep and I jerk up with a high chirp, the equivalent to the girly shriek of a softskin female. After frantically scanning my cell and realising that the guards made their wake up call I calm down. Angry and embarassed about myself I sit there, scowling and imagine what I want to do to those numbskulls, gnashing my teeths untill I stand up with a huff and walk to the bars, trying to see something else than the oh so rich interiour of my cell. The iron bars are cold and rough under my fingers and I am again side tracked, letting my finger tips wander there befor I grip the bars again.
I wish the bars would not be so close that I could at least get my snout between them and look what is there, next to my cell.

But in front of me, there is this soft skin male. Was he there yesterday? I think not, or?
Dark skin, red eyes and a grin with too much teeth like a daedroth that smells easy prey..and then he starts rambling.
And it cuts deep what he says…yes I smell the water, even if the stench of the sewer is so strong.
I still smell the fresh water and I want to swim so badly. That would be heaven, to swim and dive and wash away the depressing thoughts and the fould odour which clings to me.
Snarling I bare my teeth and rattle on the bars which wont budge and…it amuses this softskinner…but only until the moment I grab the bowl from yesterday and throw it, so its contents splatter all over him and the bowl clatters to the floor after it hit the cell bars of the..what is he called..dunmer? Yes I think…a dunmer.

Then it is my turn to smile, hiss in an amused tone and ..damn. Can I not get even a moment of fun here?
Now the guards come back and I jump down the stairs, get away in the farthest corner and…they want to get in my cell?
And who is this guy..he does not look like a guard.
They threat me with violence if I do not stay back and there is mumbling that I should not be in this cell..and soon it gets clear why there should be no one in the cell…because there is a secret passage way.
Why did I not find it?
I nearly squiek again as the older softskinner with the glimmering stones on his clothes speaks to me.
How did he come near me so quick?
Blinking stupidly is all I can do as he talks about …destiny, his death and a dream…a dream in which he saw me.
Ok…yeah sounds really reasonable..he is the emperor and in a dream he saw me and what else?
“What?” is all I can get out and then he walks away with his guards and the door is open for me to escape..and then the guards threaten me again to not follow them.
I just shrugg, than take the other way, the one which looks like a cave, at least a bit.
Did I mention I hate caves, the darkness and the chill?

My spirits sink again as I see a skeleton, a softskinner I recognize as I check the jaw and feet. Ok, I was not the first here and if my luck is any indication I will end just like Sir Bones here.
But at least I will not go without a fight because, under the dust, the rags which had been clothes one time, I find a slightly rusty dagger and even some coins.
Oh and look, whats that?
Tilting my head I peek around the next corner and oh joy…food!
Hungrily I chomp down the mushrooms which seem to like the atmosphere and have grown nicely..way better food than the mush yesterday.
With a yelp I swirl around as something bites my tail so hard I feel a scale break…and the angry…hungry, very hungry squeek makes me move backwards.
This rats are big, damn big…like sheeps. And aggressive…too aggressive for my taste and threatening my new found freedom.
-There is just me or you- and I am not willing to loose my chance of feeling the sun on my skin again, or swimming in clear water..oh joy.
The rat jumps, ready to bite and claw at me and I jab out while I try to get away from the slightly yellow teeth.
I feel the metal cut through skin and flesh, but this rat is a tough thing and only after 3 hits more and some lost feathers from my arm in which it bit, it lies still.
Wary I crouch down, poke its side with the dagger before I harvest some more mushrooms, now sure that the rat is indeed dead.
My arm full of the spongy plants, the dagger in a makeshift belt I cut from the bloody hide, I walk further through the cave..and..hey…
I nearly choke as I stuff the mushrooms down my throat, running through the tunnel and reaching the curch like hall from which the sound of battle comes.
Hey, really..what sense makes wasting my food, who knows when is the next time I get something to eat?
So I still struggle with getting the last mushroom in my gut when I swing my dagger and struck down one of this strange looking guys clad in read and black..and nearly loose my food again when the blood splatters in my face.
Who knew what mess a severed arteria makes? Lucky hit…well I didn´t. But maybe I just forgot it because…That was really a good hit, to good for someone who never has done that I muse for a second before the guards recognize and corner me.
Their constrained, loathing whispers let me shrink down until the older softskinner, the emperor speaks up and saves me from getting gutted by his men.
But hey, call me faithfull stupid, but I could not stand there and watch getting the guy killed who was …nice to me, even if it was in a strange way and all the prophetic stuff that does not make sense to me.
Only after the guards are some feet away with their charge I find enough courage to rummage through the dead softskinners clothes.
I sniff at the flasks, hurridly pull on some clothes and there is even a bit of armor. Struggling with the last piece of cloth, hopping around and munching on a piece of bread I found in a pocket, I follow the others
No idea whats in the flasks, but maybe I can sell them ..if I get out of here, storing them in the belt pouch for now.
The glares from one of the light skinned guards makes me twitter softly and fall behind them, trying to sneak and not stir the wrath of the nervous men again.
I am save for now. The guys are experienced and they know the way out of here. And..i really like that old guy. I do not know why but ..i like him. More than I should but I think with the strange day yesterday it is just normal to react this way, or?
And if I should have died today in the prison, even if I die fighting..this here is way better and I really am grateful for the strange old guy who appeared from nowhere in my cell.

Small rodents skittle here and there, between my feet..are they fleeing from something we can not see, not sense yet? Nervously I look around. There is only dust, but nothing else.
And then the men shout to protect the emperor which startles me again when there was such a eery silence only moments ago and then I run myself.
Running to reach the emperor who is swinging a sword himself, fighting and not letting his men do the work alone. Now I like the old guy even more as I bring down my blade in fast strikes down the back of an attacker which turns around and now is trying to bring me down instead the king. But befor he can land a hit, he crumbles to the floor, the grip on his weapon still strong in death and the Septim is smiling at me, wiping his sword on his robes like the warrior he seems to be, not caring for the fine cloth.
Some more flasks find their way in my pouch and also a spell, bound on paper. I can not make sense from the scribble but who knows when I can use it, or sell it.

A whiny sounds escapes me as the dark skinned guards trys to open a gate and curses. I know that we are doomed…it is a trap. They have let us walk this far and now we will die here and nobody will find us ever.
And then I am shoved in a room with the emperor and the dark skinned guard tells me to shield the Septim while they try to fight the attackers and find a way out of here.
It is all going so fast, too fast.
One moment I stand there dumbfounded from the shove, then Uriel Septim is telling me things about his dream in this cryptic speech of his…and he wants to give me the red glimming jewel, tells me to find his son, where to find him. And everything told to me in hushed, urgent whispers while I hear the guards in the next room and then running, fighting..shouting…
The world seems to crush down it all happens so fast when the asassin appears, strikes down the king and I screech enraged.
He killed the kind old man..and all too fast for me to interfer, that is not fair!
And I act faster than I can think what a stupid thing I am doing, attacking the asassin of the emperor.
I just jump, filled with hot, burning hatred and toppling the guy over.
Not fair…not fair…not fair chanting this thought with every hit I serve the scum, striking with the claws of my others hand to do as much damage as possible.

At the moment I am just a wild enraged beast ..when I bite the arm which swung around, tried to sink the weapon which murdered my savior, into my body..and I growl, shake my head and rip deep into the flesh while my dagger is plounging in the body under me even when the man no longer struggles and I know he is dead but..oh I am so angry, so white hot angry that I screech again, my feathers bristled and my scales now a darker shade of colour than normally because of my irate state.
Of course I do not see this, but the guard does and he looks at me warily, maybe thinking of me as a rabid animal that would attack him..but then he sees the dead body near me, not the one I am cowering above.
We both let our heads hang in shame and he cries…yes men cry..and he has every reason to cry. Not because the emperor told me we are doomed when he dies, that some great evil will come.
No…the reason why we should mourn is that he was kind..and brave…and I liked him.
He was a good man, he is no longer, that is why I am sad.
And only after some minutes we stir, the others dead…I and he, we survived and I tell him about the amulet, the pretty red stone and the son I should search.

Absently I rub at my mouth, clean the blood away with the robe of the murderer as I tell the dark softskinner whose name is Baurus, what Uriel Septim told me.
And now the flasks are usefull because Baurus knows which one heals the wounds we got in the fight and the one which washes away the taste I got from the asassin. Wine, it does not taste good but better then the blood, sloushing the liquid in my mouth and spitting the first sip on the ground befor I take a bigger gulp and give the bottle back to Baurus.
Now he seems nice enough, maybe because he grieves and we have to think which way we will take. What we will do now.
And then he has to leave me after he told me how to get out of here, through the canalisation.
Gross, but I have no other choice. And his way does not look better than mine because he has to go back and tell the others, whoever the others are, that he has failed.
We both sigh and smile sadly, pat each other on the shoulder and then our ways part.
I hope Baurus will bring back the body of Uriel Septim so at least he can get a proper funeral and not get mauled by the beasts which live down here.


Still there is the gnawing feeling, the wish to go back the way I came and help Baurus but…it is too risky for me. At least we both believe it, that the guards may think I had something to do with the Septimes death, so I continue my journey, climb through the hole into the secret passageway and pass the gate which was closed for our party. And there I halt a moment and sigh until the trip trap of rat feets let make me nervous again and I climb on a boulder so I can oversee the room I am in. Dirt and gravel and there is the rat, searching for food and sniffing but has not yet recognized me.
I cower on the crumbled wall, watch the rat and muse if I should attack it. I am not sure, why should i..it is just a rat even if it is so big, one could use them as farm animals.
So I spare me a fight and jump from boulders to the next wall and skitter in the next hallway. No, I do not want to attack it, what use is a rat to me?
I surely do not want to butcher it for the flesh, who knows what illnesses I could get from it? Maybe I already got one from the rat I had needed to kill. Man, really have to stop this thoughts and concentrate on my task because here is the entrance to the canalisation.


And the stench makes me stumble back and cough. Awful, even with my numbed nose from the holiday in the cell.
Blinking I try to stop my eyes tearing up, fighting down my coughing fit. No need to attract more enemys with the noises I already make. That´s worse than the stench of the blubbering ponds in black marsh, still trying to breath deeply I hear faint clicking noises, taking a turn in the direction of an approaching crab.

I can somehow understand that rats live here, but crabs..in this liquid? I can not bring myself to call it water because that’s obviously not water anymore.
I hastily jump over onto a bridge which leads over the duct and that really was a mistake because of the slimy surface.
Unmanly squeeking again I flay arms, legs and tail to stable me, sliping over the bridge, floor and banging full face into the wall in front of me
“Fucking.. shitty… awful.. stupid” I growl senseless under my breath, wiping the grime from my face, rubbing my snout over the cloth which covers my arms and then I howl, jumping and banging my head on the low ceiling because that crab dared to try and crop me.
Dizzy and enraged I stomp and jump on the crabs shell, growl and kick the offending creature in the sewer where it came from, not bothering to look if it is death.
Huffing and still swearing I stomp through the next door, finding an empty room, only with some more or less intact wooden boxes in a corner which I open and triumphantly take an iron inforced club with me..seems good to me against these crabs.
“Ooooh…shiny…” who said that only Khajit like shiny things? I stuff the two slightly dull gems in my poach together with the coins I found and attach some more pieces of armor on leather strings over my back..more stuff to sell, wonderful..that is if I can find a way out of here.
-Nice stuff one can find down here..hopefully there is no owner going to meet me on my way out…-
A bit more cheery I make my way up on the slightly slippers stairs, using more of my brain and therefor my claws to get a better grip.
Somehow it seems to me that I can taste the clean water, feel the warm sun out there soon and my steps become faster
But the gods seem to hate me,or at least have a strange sense of humor and the smile falls out of my face, leaving a pained grimace
“Nooo” I whine unhappily..that’s so unfair..another gate and there is only one way for me,one fucking way directly through the sewage, a small tunnel, barely enough space so I have not to dive through the … proverbially…shit.

There is no way to spare me this…and also no way to save the armour and other stuff I collected from getting dirty. The first thing I will buy after getting clean is a spell or at least a waterproof bag for my belongings. Not that I plan on taking a swim through the sewers regularly but..better safe than sorry.
Warily taking the first step in the –Gaaa- water, shuddering from the unwaterly consistence and the false warmth.
I forgot the foul smell? No, not really but..it is no longer the most bothering fact.
As fast as possible I half walk, half swim through the water, wary of the creatures that my wait under the surface, ready to attack. I really hate always beeing this nervous, watching for attackers, listening to every small noise..horrible, I want to get out of here.
When I am through the tunnel, climbing out of the water I free me from pouch, backbag, armor and shake like a dog to get most of the slimy dirt from my body.

I am no way of clean, but no longer dripping, so I ignore my protesting senses, fasten my belongings back and hobble down the next tunnel. Oh what a delight… smashing the next attacking crab with the club and watching how the body is devoured by it´s fellows when I walk away.
Grinning a bit sickly, maybe the fumes have wacked my brain, I climb an iron ladder..another tunnel and down the next ladder again.
I am still on edge, even if I have now a good weapon against the crabs and the rats…that I killed an asassin is also not soothing my worries what will happen if I meet bandits down here.

Can it be?
Sunshine…glorious sunshine is coming from the one tunnel in front of me.
Not the strange blue shine which shone down on me when I was in the castle or church halls or whatever hidden building I had to get through to reach the canalisation..and not the light of torches…really sunlight, beautiful sunlight.
I nearly stumble and fall again so desperate in reaching the fresh air, the way out of here.

And then…the gate squeals in protest, the hinges old and rusty.
Everything else seems forgotten as I wobble out of the tunnel, trip and stumble as I am nearly blinded by the midday sunlight which is now way too bright like the first time I opened my eyes in the cell.
Backpack, armour, clothes…everything is carelessly thrown on the grass after I am some feet away from the tunnel, stumbling like drunken, drunken from the fresh air and the sun and …the water…the water is the best part of all.
I stumble, struggling with the trousers, tripping in the end and diving a bit awkward under the surface but soon swimming just like I am supposed to, diving in loops, frolicing and just enjoying what seemed forever lost to me only some hours ago.
Sighing with a smile, bobing up and down on the surface, facing the sky I just float there..yeah that’s a small part of heaven to me. Utter bliss after the canalisation and I wish I could spend some more time here. But I need to clean my stuff or I can forget ever selling it.

Feeling some stones heavier now I drag myself back to where my belongings lay and dump them in the water so they can soak to get the grime away easier.

The flasks are safely closed, nothing goes out, nothing in, so I put them soon aside and scrub my clothes over the stones in the shallow water. The leather of my armour and the other leathery things I want to sell will hate the soaking and the lacking care. But I have not the patience, nor the time and no oil to care for it properly.
And when the leather items are hung over the twigs of a tree and drie in the sun they turn uncomfortably hard, unflexible..but nothing that some care can not reverse, so I can sell them still.
With the stench of the sewer I never could have sold anything.

I look up the hill where I see the shiny white city walls..and chuckle a bit.
It looks so clean but I know how dirty it is underneath all the shiny white marble, shaking my head to concentrate again on what to do. I wriggle back in my wet clothes, fasten the armour and getting everything else stored ..more or less safely.
The way up to the city needs time, very much time.
And why not? I am tired, my strenght seems to be drained and..the sun shines and everything looks so peacefull.
Also I find some plants to eat. No hunch what these plants are, but as an Argonian I have some inner sense about toxic and eatable plants…and I also can eat some toxic stuff the soft skinner can not.
Yeah..only logical if you think about where we come from.
A jungle with toxic plants, poisonous animals..unfriendly..and we have adapted to that.
Half way up the hill I rest a bit, lay down and doze off..i have earned it.
But soon I am up again, jogging the rest and then stopping when I see the great gate and the stable near.

Curious I stroll to the stables, watch the horses for a while. Maybe sometime I will have enough money to rent one, or even buy one…that would be nice even if I have no real clue how to ride, but one can learn it, or not?
Petting one of the meek souls who seem to be so content behind the fence, scratching the funny coloured horse behind the ears and earning a soft whine I say my good bye to them.
It also earns me a strange look from one of the softskinners who cares for the horses, but why should it bother me?
Yawning I walk through the small door in the big gate which is used by the foot walkers..and then I am a bit lost with the big city.

Yes it is like the jungle…in some way or the other..big and loud and on the first look harmless but with hidden dangers.
I think I will find my way here… and there my search beginns for a merchant whom I can sell the stuff I found…and a safe place to rest.