Nothing Between Us

"The 25th anniversary of V-Day will see the largest reunion of Normandy SR-1 and SR-2 crewmembers ever.  Even members of the Urdnot clan, including their leader Urdnot Wrex will attend as the peace talks on Tuchanka have been put on hold to allow the Conservative Forces to mull over the latest offer.  Admiral Tali'Zorah vas Rannoch has already arrived on the Citadel, a week ahead of the celebration.  The only name that's in question is the mercurial thief Kasumi Goto.  Oddly, Commander Shepard has insisted a place be reserved for Garrus Vakarian.  Most see this as a tribute to honor a fallen comrade as Garrus Vakarian was killed fourteen years ago while attempting to rescue hostages from Hegemony rebels.  Some however believe he will show up, alluding to a connection between his disappearance and the rumored reappearance of the Omega vigilante known as Archangel..."

It was at that point Len's attention strayed from the screen mounted on the wall and he turned around to look out at the presidium, leaning lazily on the railing.  Commander Shepard was the only name he had recognized for the past ten minutes, he probably should have paid more attention in school or to his parents, both of whom fought for the Alliance during the war.  There were more important things on his mind anyway; like why his girlfriend, Kaddi, had left him a hasty message to meet her by Apollo's Cafe in an hour.  Fearing the worst, getting dumped, he rushed over as soon as possible then ended up having to wait for forty minutes and counting. 

At around the forty-five minute mark there was a tap on his shoulder then, "Sorry for keeping you waiting."

The young man glanced at his omni-tool as he turned around, "Actually you're five minutes early.  I'm the asshole who rushed over here too quickly."

 "You rushed right over?" the petite quarian dressed in brown asked while reaching for a hug.

Once he was holding her he bashfully replied, "Well, your message made me nervous."

"Sorry," Kaddi apologized again as they parted.  "I guess my message was rather vague and sudden.  I just wanted to tell you in person."

"It's nothing bad, is it?"

"No," she said firmly, almost forcefully.  "There is absolutely nothing bad about what I'm about to tell you."

"Okay," after a beat he added, "Still sounds like something bad is about to happen."

Nervously she mumbled, "I hope not."

"This game isn't much fun.  Why don't you just tell me?"

"Of course."  Her hands were tightly bound in front of her.  "I told you a few months ago about the experimentally treatments that the Sirta Foundation was working on to help quarians with their immune systems.  Well, I sent in an application and a genetic sample and I've been chosen to receive them."

"You mean you'll be able to get out of your suit?"

"Yes," was all Kaddi got out before her boyfriend's arms wrapped her up and lifted her off her feet, giving her a momentary fit of giggles.

"That's great.  I'm so happy for you.  When are you getting it?"

Her laughter immediately died, "I'm leaving tomorrow."

He slowly put her back down, "Tomorrow?"

"It's either leave tomorrow or wait two years."  Feeling eye contact was important she stepped out of his grasp, but kept hold of his hands.

"How long will you be gone?"

"Up to two months, depending on whether any complications arise."  Her heart was beating against the inside of her suit like a drum.

 "So that's why we had to meet so quickly; could have at least thrown an 'I have great news' or 'don't worry, no one died' or something into your message."

"Yeah," she barely acknowledged what he said as she was bracing for what she had to say next, "There is something else I have to tell you.  Something I didn't think would ever really come up or really even matter, but I think I should tell you now.  Using human terminology, I am a trans woman."

It was hard for Kaddi to read his expression, quarians weren't very good at it in general, but she doubted an elcor could decipher the weird look on his face.  Though, she did remember seeing him in a similar state before, the one and only time she ever asked him to help her study for an exam.  Whatever was going through his brain, she was steadily growing less afraid of what it might be.  She trusted him and loved him, but still there had been a small nagging voice in the back of her head whispering to her all the worst possible outcomes.  None of those were going to come true, she could tell, not because of his face but because of his hands.  He didn't let go of hers, he even tightened his grip when she wobbled a tad and seemed to be taking a step away from him.

"So," he finally spoke after less than a minute, though it felt much longer.  "Does that mean you were born a boy?"

"Sort of, but during my adolescence I realized I was a woman.  My parents were very supportive and for my first fitting they gave me a female suit, with a few modifications.  I then underwent hormone and gene therapy when I got older."

"Do you have a penis?"

"Yes."

"Are you going to have it removed or changed or whatever they do?"

"No, I like my body how it is."

"Oh!" fear flashed across his face and he tightened his grip.  "I wasn't saying you should or anything.  I'm sorry.  That isn't what I meant, not at all.  That was awful.  Everything I said was awful.  Shit.  I'm sorry.  Sorry about the dumb questions."

With a smile she replied, "It's alright, I'm used to your dumb questions."

"I don't really know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything.  I just wanted to tell you before I left so you can think about it while I'm gone."

"We can still message and call each other though, right?"

She was quick to respond, "Of course."

"Good, you were making it sound like we couldn't talk at all while you're gone."

"I wasn't sure you'd want to."

"Of course I do.  I wouldn't let such a small thing get between us."

She absentmindedly glanced down, "I guess it is kind of small."

"What?"  His eyes followed hers to her crotch. "No not that.  I don't mean that or maybe I do.  That kind of is the only difference isn't it?"

"Pretty much."

Len quieted for a moment before saying, "I'm not going to lie, I do have some things to mull over.  I'm not completely sure what those things are, but I'll figure out what they are then mull them.  Anyway, I love you and wish you the best of luck with your treatments."

Tears in her eyes she wrapped her arms around his neck and whispered, "Thank you."

He returned the hug, "I'll see you when you get back."

"Yes."  Kaddi tightened her grip, "I love you too."