I Prefer Plan B

I've been busy with work, but I thought I'd share this. It was supposed to be a funny, completely cracked out fic for Valentines Day, so you've been warned that the logic makes no sense and it would never happen. Hence the AU. But that's what PWPs are for!

The quote that embodies this story: "I have a really bad idea!"

I Prefer Plan B

Cliff sighed in aggravation; he had thought he had avoided Elicoor’s primitive jail cells for the rest of his life, but he had apparently been wrong. They were as cold as he remembered them being, except this cell didn’t have frigid water dripping down his neck from icicles. Maybe Kirlsa prison cells were a bit better. And this time he had a cellmate that he didn’t mind being locked up with. Not that Fayt was bad company, but sometimes the man craved adult company. He glanced at the captain sitting next to him on the cell bench.

Albel glanced back with a scowl. “Stop staring at me and think of a plan to get us free.”

“Why don’t you think of something, this is your stomping ground, isn’t it?”

The young man’s cheeks flared red; he did not like being reminded of the fact that he was currently a prisoner in his own prison. Before he could snap back, a voice from the cell next to them called out. Cliff got up and tried to peer around the bars.

“Fayt?” He called.

“Do you guys have a plan?” The boy asked, trying to crane around the bars and separating wall.

“Not yet, do you?”

“Sophia thinks she can use her symbology to break the lock and get us out of here, but there are a few problems.”

“What’s that?” Cliff asked, excited that the kid had come up with an escape plan.

“Well…we can’t all get out, we’d need someone to stay behind and serve as a distraction while the rest of us go out to the arena and turn off the Vendeeni transporter. Otherwise, we’d have all the guards after us and be sitting ducks.”

The excitement the man had felt died quickly. He didn’t like the idea of leaving someone behind. Maria came up to her own cell bars and joined in with the planning. They whispered to each other for a long time, careful not to catch the eye of the guard at the end of the hall.

When Cliff turned to look at him, Albel noted the devious grin and sparkle in his eyes.

“What are you grinning about, worm?”

The man approached. “Looks like you and I need to make a big distraction to get the attention of all the guards on the floor.”

“And how do you propose we do that?”

Cliff grinned wider. “How do you feel about voyeurism?”

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The guard at the end of the hall came to attention when he heard a commotion where the prisoners were being held. He glanced down at the cells, curious and annoyed; he did not need any problems during his watch. Some of the prisoners were standing by the bars, but they appeared to be quiet and looking into another cell. The unusual behavior and sounds intrigued him enough to leave his post by the hall entrance and go investigate.

When he passed the cell that the blue haired boy was in, the kid yelled, “Can you please get them out of here?!”

The guard ignored him and went up to the bars of one of the opposite cells. When he peered in, he dropped his gun in shock. In the back of the cell, he saw one of the prisoners in the middle of ravaging the other. The odd noises he had heard were the sounds of the two sloppily exchanging saliva.

“Hey! Stop that!”

The two prisoners glanced up at him then went back to necking. The guard continued to yell and when the two didn’t stop, he unlocked the door and stepped in.

Cliff was in the middle of running his tongue along the side of Albel’s jaw when the tip of a gun was shoved in his face. His tongue retreated into his mouth and he glared up at the guard.

“Do you mind? We are in the middle of something.”

“I can see that!” The guard said, shoving his gun closer, threateningly. “Now get off him or I’ll shoot you both.”

Cliff grumbled unhappily, pulling his hand out from under Albel’s shirt, and sat at the end of the cot. “What’s it matter to you anyway if we get a little cozy?”

The guard started to scream insults at him and while the man ranted, Cliff glanced at Albel. The captain nodded once before surging forward and slamming the guard onto the floor. Once the man was down, the two of them darted out of the cell and down the hall. It didn’t take long for the guard to get back to his feet and proceed to chase the two escaped prisoners. He called for the rest of the guards to help him track them and soon there was a massive manhunt underway.

The rest of the prisoners waited until they heard the tromping of boots in the hall die down before beginning their escape plan. The easy part was unlocking the doors with Sophia’s symbology, the longer, trickier part would be evading the few guards left to patrol the hallways and then destroying the transporter. Their future depended on how good of a distraction Cliff and Albel made. As they scurried down halls and ducked into rooms, Maria prayed the two men would distract the Vendeeni long enough to buy their lives.

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Albel paused on the landing to the second floor. He panted for a moment before listening for the sounds of following footsteps.

“Did we lose them?” Cliff asked, worriedly.

“No, they’re coming.”

“Good. Now where do we run to?”

The Elicoorian turned to sneer at him. “Why are you asking me? This was your plan, wasn’t it?”

“Yeah, but this is your building. You know it better than anyone.”

Albel snorted. “Obviously, we lead them to the door. They’ll be so far from Leingod, they wouldn’t be able to stop him even if they did realize we’re just decoys.”

“Good plan!” Cliff said, smacking the younger man on the back. He received a glare for that. Then the man thought harder. “But…”

“But what? What are you thinking, worm?”

“I’m thinking that time is going to be an issue. If we get to the door, the guards may just give up on us. Fayt’s the real objective, who cares if we got away? By the time we come back with reinforcements, they’ll be gone. And if we get recaptured they’ll immediately take us back to the cell and see that Fayt and the others are gone. They won’t have enough time to destroy the transporter.”

The captain glowered at him, his mood souring when he realized that what Cliff said was true. “So what do you propose we do to keep them distracted?”

Cliff turned and grinned at him. “You remember what I first asked you, up in the cell?”

Albel scowled. “You asked how I felt bout voyeurism. Are you implying you want to have sex with me in order to distract the enemy?”

“Wouldn’t you be distracted if you found two of your prisoners going at it in the middle of the hallway?”

“No, I would kill them.”

“Well, the Vendeeni obviously want us alive for some reason, bartering maybe, but what matters is they didn’t outright kill us, so we shouldn’t have to worry about them killing us now. And even if they did want to kill us, they’d be too shocked when they saw us. And it’s just plain rude to kill someone during sex.”

Albel’s fist shook as the urge to strike the man possessed him. “Somehow I doubt the legitimacy of what you’re saying, fool!”

The sound of multiple pairs of boots thundering down the stairs cut off the tirade the captain was about to release on his fellow escapee. The two men turned to look at the stairs.

“Well, tough luck, Albel, we’re doing it my way!”

Cliff took hold of the Elicoorian’s slim wrist and pulled him down the hall when the first group of men stepped onto the landing. An order was shouted at them to stop, which they naturally ignored. They ran down many corridors, Cliff explaining the plan as they went. When they crashed down the stairs to the first floor, the two stopped running. In the next hallway by the door, in plain sight should the men follow, Cliff pushed the captain into the wall and started to kiss him.

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The first soldier down the steps looked for less than five seconds before spotting the escaped prisoners. He stood still, watching to make sure he was seeing what he thought he was. The rest of the men stalled by his side, following his gaze. Their two prisoners were in the middle of making out.

Albel growled in his throat as the man’s tongue pushed past his lips and forced his teeth apart. He did not want to be kissing the gigantic ox, nor did he want to be doing such a thing in front of an audience, but, he was sad to admit, the man’s plan was working. The soldiers were staring at them in disbelief, none of them making a move to split he and Cliff up or return to the upper levels. In that case, the captain decided, he had to play along and make a show.

When Albel pushed forward, throwing his slim body into the man’s arms, Cliff stumbled a step backwards. He had expected to meet with resistance each step of the way, but suddenly the Elicoorian’s tongue was venturing into his mouth, tasting him. He glanced out of the corner of his eye to look at the Vendeeni. They were riveted. It was time for the show to start then.

He pushed Albel back against the wall. “That’s it, baby, just like that.”

The captain growled in response, but forced a knee between Cliff’s legs. He ran his claws down the man’s back, intentionally tearing fabric, while his hand tugged at Cliff’s thick, blonde hair. The Klausian wasn’t a bad kisser, all things considered. Albel wondered how well the man was in other, more intimate areas. And since they needed to be distracting…

Cliff faltered in his kissing when he felt the slim Elicoorian buck his hips forward. If he wasn’t mistaken…Albel was getting hard. And, to the man’s astonishment, that turned him on. Funny, Cliff thought to himself as he pulled the captain’s hips closer, he had never considered Albel good sex material. Skinny brats just weren’t his style, but this one time he would make an exception. As they kissed, he reached to Albel’s waist and pulled at his sarong. It only took two strong tugs before the garment ripped and he tossed it to the floor. Albel gasped and glared at him, but Cliff grinned and grabbed him by the waist.

The guards watched in rapt fascination as the large prisoner dragged the other one to the ground and continued their…intimate encounter. One of them leaned towards another.

“Should we stop them?”

Before the other man could respond, he was cut off by a loud groan.

Albel arched his back off the hard floor as the man’s fingers tugged at his panties, pulling them down his thighs. He did not know why, but his body was responding to the large man’s attentions. It had been awhile since he had had a bedmate; he would chalk it up to desperation and nothing more.

Seeing the skinny captain so obviously aroused pleased Cliff greatly. It was a boost to his libido. He wrapped a hand around the young man’s cock and began to stroke it until it was leaking wetness, rubbing his thumb across the head and then stroking down the shaft. Albel growled and pushed himself further into the man’s hand.

“You know, for a skinny brat, you’re kind of sexy.”

The captain snorted and dug his claws into the man’s back, tearing through Cliff’s shirt and drawing blood from the skin underneath. Cliff hissed in pain, then removed his hand from the young man’s body. Without thinking it through—this plan required that they keep the thinking at a minimum level—he unzipped his pants without unbuckling his belt, and pulled his stiff cock out.

Albel’s eyebrows shot up in surprise; the man was larger than any other bedmate he had had, the captain thought. He wanted to take advantage of that. A grin spread across the young man’s lips as he reached out and touched Cliff’s cock. The man jerked at the feel of soft flesh against his heated skin.

“Why don’t you put your mouth on me, brat?”

“Never in a million years.” Albel replied, giving Cliff a squeeze.

“You better plan on doing more than touch me or I might have to use force.”

The young man made a strange purring sound low in his throat, slowing his strokes to teasing, light touches. “I might like that.”

The façade broke for a moment and Cliff paused, looking into the lustful eyes of the Elicoorian braced beneath him. The plan was either working so well that Cliff was getting fooled also, or Albel was enjoying the encounter. That fact, to the man’s astonishment, made him want to have sex with the skinny captain even more.

Albel dragged his fingertips across the heated head of the man’s cock then brushed his thumb across the slit. He rubbed the drops of pre-cum across the sensitive skin and then wrapped his fingers around the shaft and gave an experimental pump. When he felt Cliff jerk forward into his closed fist, the young man laughed.

Cliff watched the captain pump his cock playfully then those sexy eyes turned to him once more. The fingers loosened around his cock and the man let out a sound of exasperation, or perhaps it was desperation to be touched again.

“What are you doing?”

He did not receive a response. Albel locked eyes with him, then slid the hand that had previously been wrapped around Cliff’s cock down his own stomach. He waited for the man’s pupils to dilate and to see him swallow before opening his legs and slipping his hand between his thighs.

Cliff blinked then leaned forward to whisper, “What are you doing? This isn’t part of the plan! We get our cocks out and play, that’s it! No penetration! That takes too much time!”

The Elicoorian fixed him with a dangerous grin. “I’m changing the plans.”

Before he could respond, Albel reached out and grabbed the man’s cock. Cliff made a strangled noise in his throat and bucked forward involuntarily.

“You better stop that, or else I might go along with your new plan. And if that happens you’ll never—”

Albel squeezed him again. The debate ended there, without much argument.

From a distance, the two prisoners looked like they were wrestling with each other, but the guards quickly became aware of the fact that the two were trying to copulate. At first they had merely been stroking each other’s cocks and did not seem to have any real intention of having sex, but that quickly changed. The large one was grappling with the skinny one’s limbs. They were unsure what he was trying to do, but soon enough the man had hoisted the other one’s legs onto his shoulders. From their vantage point, they could see the blonde’s erection standing stiff and proud, and they did not doubt that, regardless of guns pointed at them, the two would fuck right on the spot.

The guards exchanged nervous glances.

It seemed like it had been a long time since he had been bent in the middle, looking down his body, waiting to be filled. Albel looked intently at the man holding his legs. This was the stupidest plan he had heard of, much less participated in. But, he himself had changed it to a much more intimate encounter. If they were going to have their cocks out, they should just fuck and enjoy themselves. And at that point, Leingod and his crew had to be at the arena, calling reinforcements. A quick romp would keep the guards’ attention for the rest of the time the group needed.

Cliff kept a good grip on the captain’s legs, resting them on his shoulders so as not to strain the young man’s muscles. Fuck the plan; he wanted to screw some tight Elicoorian ass. The presence of the guards had become meaningless. Naturally, he would keep an eye out to make sure they all stayed and didn’t cause a problem for Fayt, but he no longer cared if they watched.

There was no handy lubricant around, so he had to spend a few minutes working a saliva covered finger in and out of the captain’s tight passage. He was worried about how tight the young man’s body squeezed him, but the hisses of pained pleasure that Albel let out were reassuring. It would be a tight fit and if the captain enjoyed a bit of pain then there would be no problem.

After the man had worked two fingers into the slim body beneath him, Albel grabbed his arm with his claws and growled,

“Put your dick in me already, before I change my mind.”

The Klausian laughed, pulling his fingers out and immediately placing the tip of his cock at the young man’s entrance. “Ask and you shall receive, brat.”

Without warning, Albel moved his claws from the man’s arm and curled them in Cliff’s hair, pulling his head close and mashing their lips together. While the man struggled to gain composure, the Elicoorian bucked forward and used his other hand to pull the Klausian’s cock into his body. Cliff made a startled sound then growled into the kiss and thrust forward.

“That’s how you want it to be? I’m game.”

Albel’s action set their pace. It was not a soft and slow coupling; they knew their time was limited and neither of them were of a mind to be particularly gentle to the other. Cliff pressed his body closer to the Elicoorian, pinning him to the floor as he thrust into the young man, slow and powerful strokes that rocked Albel against the hard stone floor. If he felt any pain, Albel did not let on. He bared his teeth in an animalistic snarl and moved his legs to wrap around the Klausian’s waist.

“Gods, you’re a fucking mammoth. You better fuck like an ox as well as look like one, or I will be greatly disappointed.”

The man slammed into Albel. “Keep talking, little freak.”

When Albel arched his back suddenly, letting out a howl of what could have been pain or pleasure, the guards cocked their guns. They waited a moment and when they saw that the captain was not being attacked, they slowly lowered the barrels of their weapons.

“I don’t think we should be watching this.” One of them said.

The others nodded, but all of them were engrossed in watching the couple on the ground. The large one was pounding into the smaller one and he did not seem to be holding any enthusiasm back. Albel was arching violently, mouth opened wide and letting out strangled noises. Any outsider would have thought he was being violent abused.

Albel did not feel violently abused though. He dug nails and claws into the man’s back and used the strength of his legs to pull the Klausian in deeper. When the man slammed against the spot inside of him that made his toes curl, the captain let out a hoarse yell and commanded that Cliff do that again.

Despite the grave importance this distraction plan played, Cliff somehow forgot about the kids trying to jam the transporter and became solely focused on plowing into the exotic creature beneath him. It was not the easiest thing to do with all of his clothes still on, but they more than managed. Albel had been laid out before him, his lower body nude and waiting, and they had both wanted it. So, Cliff took the opportunity. It had been awhile since he had bedded another male, boobs were sort of his thing, but Albel had a perfect body and the captain’s impossibly tight passage drove him mad from his first thrust inside.

They could not afford a truly gratifying sexual experience, unfortunately. Albel bucked forward eagerly, angling his hips so the man’s cock brushed up against the sensitive spot inside of him. As he watched the captain force himself down upon the cock in his body, Cliff wondered what the feisty Elicoorian would act like if they had ample time to go about getting off. Would he enjoy foreplay? Would he like his nipples teased and pinched? Maybe the captain had a fetish for vibrators. Perhaps he would try to find out. Later. At the moment, the man kept up his fast and powerful pace. Their bodies moved together, flesh striking and making a wet, crisp sound. It was the closest thing to ‘working together’ that the two of them had ever done.

Cliff was the first to climax, losing himself after the captain clenched his muscles and pushed down on the man’s cock. He grit his teeth and sucked in a breath as he came, spurting hot semen deep inside the young man’s body. Albel made a low keening sound at the sensation, body tingling at the feel of the man’s seed coating his inner walls. Even though his cock was getting softer, Cliff refused to pull out. He shifted his weight onto his arms, off of the captain, and then sat up and pulled Albel into his arms. His cock was still buried inside of Albel and the young man continued to grind down on him.

As his sex heightened senses slowly returned to normal, the Klausian had enough presence of mind to remember why they were having sex on the training facility’s floor in the first place. He leaned forward and whispered into the young man’s ear,

“Sorry, but I have to get you off quickly. Fayt and Maria should have gotten reinforcements by now and I doubt they’d wanna see us doing it on the floor.”

Albel pulled back temporarily to look at the man, eyes flashing. “Don’t mention their names and ruin this. Do what you must, but I WILL come by the end of this.”

The man grinned. “I wouldn’t dream of leaving you unsatisfied.”

Without another word, Cliff slipped his hand between them to wrap around the captain’s cock. Albel jerked, but then let out a pleased growl and continued to buck against the man. Having the Klausian stroking him while he thrust down on the man’s semi-hard cock was more pleasurable for the captain, for the moment at least. He savored the feel of strong, callused fingers wrapped around him, pumping him with a tight, yet oddly soft grip.

After only a small number of strokes, the Elicoorian tensed, his body arching, and came into Cliff’s hand. He held still for a moment, letting the pleasure wash over him, then slowly let his muscles relax. When he had composed himself, the man grinned and lifted the hand up so Albel could see.

“Wow. I guess despite everything you say you really do like me.”

The captain snorted softly and then leaned forward to take one of Cliff’s fingers in his mouth, sucking it clean. “Get me a rag, ox. I need to be cleaned.”

There was a stunned silence from both Cliff and the guards. Once he gathered enough coherency to register the request, Cliff pulled an old, threadbare handkerchief from his back pocket. Albel took it and pushed away from him, turning his back to their audience and cleaning the semen from between his legs and his stomach after his own release.

The handkerchief was wadded up and thrown back at the man. Cliff picked it up and shoved it back into his pocket then watched as Albel pulled the little pair of purple panties up his legs and retried his sarong. They shared a look that communicated both of their confusion over the significance of their coupling, but they were quickly interrupted when half a dozen guns were cocked at them. They turned to look at the guards.

“Quite a show you put on,” one man said, leveling his barrel at Cliff’s chest, “I hope you enjoyed it because that’s the last time you’ll ever have sex.”

The Elicoorian snorted. The man sounded unbelievably stupid, but that hardly mattered. His sensitive hearing could already pick up the sound of footsteps running towards them. They were not the heavy fall of boots, as the guards had, but softer soled shoes, like the children had.

Cliff could hear it as well. He smirked and put a hand on his hip. “I’m glad you enjoyed the show, because I know I certainly enjoyed starring in it.” He glanced at Albel. “I’m going to be fucking that ass of yours again real soon, brat.”

Albel laughed loudly. “Don’t count on it, maggot. I only lowered myself to be touched by you because of the plan, nothing more.”

That caught the soldiers’ attention. “What plan?”

They did not have to answer. Seconds after the question had been uttered, the hall filled with Quark soldiers, all bearing guns. The Vendeeni tried to form a combative stance, but it was clear they were outnumbered and had no chance. No shots need to be fired.

Once the soldiers had been rounded up and shackled, Maria came over to speak to Cliff. She glanced at Albel, who was standing close by, and said,

“I don’t know what you two did, but you kept them occupied long enough for us to get reinforcements and clear the way. We owe you.”

Cliff shrugged. “It was no big deal. Those guys were easily entertained anyways.”

“Entertained?” The girl raised her eyebrow.

When the man laughed, Albel made a disgusted noise and stalked off. Cliff allowed him to leave without hindrance, but when they were all filing into the arena, ready to transport back to the Diplo, he caught the captain by the shoulder. Albel looked at him in distaste.

“I meant what I said. I’m going to be fucking you in a short amount of time.”

“You have to be on the planet to fuck me, fool.”

“Or you can come with us.” Cliff countered. “We still have a lot of business to attend to. Fayt’s dad got shot, so we have no idea how to stop these enforcers. It would be a whole new adventure for you to take part in.”

“And would you be able to return me when it was over?”

“The ship’s navigation system can log Elicoor’s location; it shouldn’t be a problem.”

There was a brief silence. Albel blinked several times then said, “A new mission, hmm? And Elicoor has been getting boring lately. Very well. I’ll accompany you. But don’t think this little plan of yours will allow you to effortlessly slip into my bed anytime you want. You’re little more than a writhing maggot to me and I don’t bed insects.”

The man rolled his eyes. “You’re such a brat. Even if you think that, I’m still going to try to get into your bed, so be prepared.”

“I consider myself warned.”

Albel turned and went back into the facility and jotted a quick note, which he nailed to the front door. He explained the new mission and his whereabouts and with some luck, he hoped one of his idiot subordinates would actually obey his command to inform the king. When he returned to the arena, Cliff grinned at him. Albel resisted the temptation to claw the man’s eyes out and instead walked past to the other group members. His behavior did not chill the man’s desire. Cliff had only gotten a taste of what a sexy, eager, feisty Elicoorian lover was like and he was determined to have more. Luckily, he had time before this mission was over and he was confident that, with his skills in wooing, he would be in the captain’s bed again in a matter of days. If Albel was agreeable. Until then, he still had that wadded up handkerchief with Albel’s scent on it.

~END

Cliff logic…I can’t follow it.