Weight

A/N This is bugging me. I wrote it, decided I hated it, edited it, decided it was better but not great, edited it some more and now I just don’t know. If anyone has any ideas about how to make this better or wants to adopt it then be my guest because quite frankly it’s getting on my tits!

Enjoy!

Weight.

Standing awkwardly outside the door Cloud hesitated. He had been gone for weeks and he looked like shit and for a moment he doubted himself. Would Leon be pleased to see him? Deciding that he didn’t care even though he knew that was bullshit he opened the door and quickly stepped inside.

Leon turned to face him, towel in hand as he dried his ruffled hair, his upper body bare and slightly glistening from where he hadn’t dried himself properly from his shower. His uniform leather trousers were on but his feet were bare leaving hot sweat patches on the wooden floor leading all the way from the adjoining bathroom. Upon seeing Cloud stood just inside the room he lowered the towel, throwing it on to the bed.

“Nice of you to show up.” He said levelling his gaze at the younger man.

“Don’t start.” Cloud replied just as coolly as he stepped further into the room wanting desperately to just sit down and not feel so exhausted. Cloud felt the tension in the air melt a little as Leon’s shoulders slumped. Cloud didn’t know it, but Leon had promised a long time ago not to be an ass when it came to Cloud and his ‘disappearances’ and Leon was nothing if not a man of his word.

Leon sighed and sat down on the bed, inviting Cloud along with him.

Cloud wasted no time in unbuckling his harness, trying to lift it from his shoulders.

“Here, let me help.” Leon said softly as he lifted the lumbering sword from his lovers back.

Cloud felt the weight lift immediately, his body feeling light and like it wasn’t his own. He let out a small but unmistakable groan of appreciation and turned to face Leon.

Leon was sat gazing at him for some time before he spoke. His eyes were filled with a kind of emotion that Cloud had a name for, but rarely any experience. He knew all of these things by name, but so often he let these things pass him by, inexperienced.

“You look terrible.” Leon said softly, wondering where he had been, what he had witnessed and what if any problems he had resolved this time. His hand reached out for Cloud’s gloved one and grasping it tightly he tugged a little. Cloud inched closer until he was stood in between Leon’s long slender legs, his sable haired lover’s face just inches from his own abdomen.

A little of Cloud’s awkwardness melted and he allowed himself a fleeting curve of the lips before he lifted his other hand and dared to run it through Leon’s hair, smoothing out all of the kinks and tangles that the towel had left. He thought in his mind how good Leon looked, how utterly fucking desirable, and he registered the coiling of heat in his belly, but there was where it all stayed; inside.

“One week.” Cloud all but whispered, like he was having a second conversation with someone else.

But the look on Leon’s face said it all.

Nothing had changed, not a single movement or facial twitch, but somehow Leon’s face said it all. Like the fighter that he was Leon pushed it all down, his feelings, his little speech that he had prepared, his utter disappointment. Cloud would never know any of them.

Letting his eyes slide shut he hooked his arms around Cloud’s waist, tugging gently on him to bring him closer. Leon could feel the heat radiating from his young lover as he rested his cheek against his taut abdomen inhaling deeply the scents that he knew well and craved the most.

Leon couldn’t help it, in this room at that moment, he couldn’t help but feel utterly lost and yet somehow he felt like this was the moment that he should be the most honest. His feelings of vulnerability nothing compared to the regret he would feel if he just let the moment pass.

“Don’t go.”

“You know I have to.”

“No you don’t.”

Cloud chuckled at this. He couldn’t help it, Leon sounded like a child and it made his heart swell with uncomfortable emotions. Hidden away under tangled bangs and the crook of his elbow, Leon smiled too.

The troubled swordsman relented as he let his lover pull him down and lay him on the bed, and he put up no fight as he let his companion help him with his gloves and straps, his buckles and shoes until finally Cloud shrugged his way out of his blue sweater and lay back on the bed. Leon followed and just laid there, head propped up so that conversation, no matter how limited would be easier.

“I missed you.” Leon offered in a quiet feathery voice, not caring if it sounded pathetic. He really should be over all that by now he told himself.

Cloud’s eyes were shut but he smiled anyway and that was as much of a response as Leon figured he was going to get. But it didn’t matter anyway.

They lay like that for a while, in companionable silence and for the first time in weeks Cloud felt the uncomfortable feelings of expectation and responsibility lift. Although it was coupled with the knowledge that in a weeks’ time he would have to shoulder them all again, he really couldn’t bring himself to care.

“I missed you too.” He allowed himself to whisper.

Leon wouldn’t let on his surprise, nor would he tell anyone how those four little words affected him with things that he didn’t even have words for. Bringing Cloud’s scarred knuckled to his lips he quietly and gently pressed kisses to them, loving the feeling of contentment and peace, his burdens of worry and fear lifted now that Cloud was back again, safe and sound. For a while at least.