Conversation is for Heterosexuals

This is what my brain manages to produce when low on sleep and the last thing I did before going to bed was read a list of Shakespearean insults (oh yeah, you heard me) and look at the AkuRoku desktop on my computer. So yeah…please excuse the crack. And yes, I realize that I overly abuse my italicizing rights but just deal. I like the swoopy letters. So stfu already. OH and enjoy! :)

Conversation is for Heterosexuals

Larxene was a university student. To be perfectly exact, she was a very bored university student. Learning just did that to a person. So to say that she had jumped at the idea when someone offered her a bet to pass the time would have been an immense understatement. To be perfectly exact, she essentially mauled the necessary information out of said person so she could begin her fun. She was to get three couples that’d been beating around the bush for ages to hook up with each and it didn’t matter what methods she used, as long as it happened. Oh, and all the couples had to be gay. To be perfectly exact, that is.

So she settled on her chosen victims and began to put her plan into action with a relish only seen by professional eaters attempting to devour their fifty hotdogs before their opponent managed it first. She knocked said men out after taking them all to the bar under the pretense that she’d finally managed to convince her psychology teacher that Larxene really could read the poor old man’s mind. In reality, it hadn’t been very difficult to get all six men knocked out. She’d just had to handle mentioning a few well-chosen taboos and embarrassments among them and mysteriously place a drink conveniently laden with knockout drugs in front of each of them at the correct time. All in a day’s work, really…

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It was dark and very cramped. That was the first thing that registered in Roxas’s mind as he woke slowly and awkwardly from the haze his mind was in. The second thing that occurred to him was that he was in a considerable amount of pain, dull as it may be, and said pain was centered in his lower abdominal and pelvic region. Hazy minds were bad because a hazy mind meant it took Roxas a great deal longer than it normally should to figure out exactly why he was in pain.

A soundless yelp of alarm escaped him in a sharp inhale of air and the muscles in his lower body unwillingly clenched in reaction to the intrusion in his ass. Something was up his butt! Literally! Now to figure out what it was exactly. Roxas’s hands trembled slightly as they reached behind him when squirming ineptly produced no results as what he was inside was far too small to allow him more than a few inches of movement. Roxas’s entire body went into mild shock as fingers grazed what couldn’t possibly be mistaken for anything other than a human body and an insanely fit one at that. Shut up, brain! Why oh why did he have to have such a graphic imagination at a time like this? It never kicked in when he was writing an essay for his college professors but of course it would think now was an appropriate time to start fantasizing…NOT fantasizing! All right, now the only other problem to solve is who this person is exactly…shit.

There really was no good way to figure this out, especially since, while he was blessed with astoundingly good night-vision, pitch black was not something he did. That would make him a cat. And Roxas certainly was not a cat. Catty at times, yes, but not an actual cat. So what to do with situation was the question. Now Roxas was a rational person with an extremely intelligent and logical mind. Finding himself in such a situation as he’d never experienced or even dreamed of before would test even the brightest crayon in the box. So, of course, Roxas did the only thing a rational and extremely intelligent and logical individual could do when he wakes up to find himself impaled on some unknown person’s dick.

Axel managed to wake up miraculously on his own though it was easily arguable that the bloodcurdling scream of horror only a foot in front of him may have assisted in some way. Needless to say, Axel was very much awake at this point and it was at this point that he managed to register the, ahem, predicament he was currently involved in. And a predicament it was, indeed. It also didn’t calm him in the slightest that he actually recognized the screamer. In fact, the very reality that this was who it was just made everything worse.

“Shit, Roxas! Stop moving, damn it! You’re gonna break my dick off if you squirm like that!” Said blonde stopped moving momentarily as the familiar voice was identified to a very specific face in his mind and suddenly the struggling he’d been doing previously didn’t seem to be nearly enough warranting who this was.

Unfortunately for Axel, Roxas seemed to find the whole hurt-Axel-in-a-very-emasculating-type-of-way thing a very agreeable concept. If breaking Axel’s stupid…yeah, was going to get said man out of him, then he’d happily and enthusiastically do it. So rather than ceasing his struggles, he threw himself whole-heartedly into kicking his wiggling up a few gears. Had he actually heard the unmanly squeak of pain coming from the redhead, he might have felt at least a twinge of pity or guilt but as his blood was rushing in his ears…wait a second…Roxas’s mind paused while his body continued to move. What is…oooohhh! An incredibly audible moan escaped the boy and he froze all his movement. “What…”

Axel’s grim voice was laced with a bit of amusement and pain as he replied. “Obviously you’ve never been fucked by a guy before. That was your prostate. Now, you little shrimp, if you don’t want to have an erection in about ten seconds, I’d say you stop moving.”

Roxas needed absolutely no more convincing than that and began to continuously thank the almighty gods that it was dark in this box because that meant Axel didn’t know that the unfortunate little blonde already had a hard-on. Woe is him.

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Larxene stood before her three practically hermetically sealed boxes that contained her three chosen couples, all of them in the same quandary as Roxas and Axel, the first of the group to awaken, had found themselves in. She watched with perhaps a small twitch of remorse as Roxas had his typical conniption fit…wait, whom was she trying to kid here? An absolutely wicked leer appeared on her face as she savored the sound of victory that was Roxas’s scream of terror. Really now, she was only trying to help the poor, pitiful blonde get a boyfriend…and perhaps a much needed lay.

She listened with eager ears at the argument that immediately broke out between the adorable soon-to-be couple. Axel seemed to be attempting to calm the blonde enough to prevent himself from receiving any permanent damage to the family jewels while Roxas alternately threw insults in his face. The one that really made her laugh was when Axel seemed to finally grow tired of the abuse and responded to Roxas’s accusation of “Flamer!” with “Hey, I’m not the one taking it up the ass, girly boy!” Larxene snorted loudly before clapping her hand over her face to quiet herself as silence immediately descended on the pair in the box.

“…Is there someone out there?” Roxas’s voice came out tentatively, as though he was worried that if he said it with too much anticipation, his hopes for rescue would be crushed. Granted, even though she was there, Larxene had absolutely no inclination to rescue him anyway so he could beg all he wanted. He’d soon realize he’d be begging to the wrong person.

“Hello boys.” Larxene drawled languidly and she heard twin sputters of indignation from within.

“Larxene?” Axel’s voice said incredulously. “What the fuck are you doing here?” He yelped in pain as Roxas seemed to have hit him rather hard.

“Don’t swear at her, you asshole! She can get us out of here!” Roxas now addressed Larxene. “Larxene, can you see a way to get us out of this…whatever it is? It seems to be stuck from here.” Larxene smirked at the innocent demeanor and shook her head in mock despair.

“I’m afraid the box you’re in has a lock on it that needs the key in my pocket. That’s probably why you can’t open it from the inside.” Silence greeted her for a brief moment.

“Wait…if you have the key, why aren’t you letting us out?” Roxas’s voice seemed to waver slightly and he seemed unsure of himself.

Larxene clucked her tongue disapprovingly and replied, “Now why would I do that when I was the one who put the two of you in there in the first place?”

“You did what?” Axel roared and Larxene’s eyes widened as the entire box practically lifted off the floor and scooted towards her. Her surprise faded into amusement though as she heard a staggered moan coming from Roxas at Axel’s sudden movement.

“I locked the two of you in that little box together for a little bet. There are four more guys in this room in the same position as you so don’t think you’re special or anything.” Larxene tapped sardonically on the top of the box. “You should be pleased. I did all the work for you so that you could skip right over the foreplay and get straight to the good, hard buttsex.”

“Larxene, you sick, sadistic bitch!” Axel cursed and Roxas grunted uncomfortably as the movement from Axel’s outburst moved the redhead’s shaft within him once again. He formed curses of his own to cover up for the fact that he couldn’t completely deny that it sort of, maybe felt good…to an extent. You know, when he wasn’t thinking about the fact that there was a cock up his ass! And he wasn’t even anywhere near in a relationship with the lanky man! Hell, they were barely even friends, probably more like acquaintances. And despite Roxas’s monster crush on the man, Axel’s dick had absolutely no right to be where it currently was!

“I’m going to kill you, you dankish, hugger-mugging flax-wench!” Now, in all fairness, Roxas would like to argue that having something the size of an enormous, astronomically large cucumber shoved up deep inside of him temporarily put is brain on deep-fry and sizzle. So the fact that his words were greeted by nothing but utter silence—even the crickets had stopped chirping at that statement—didn’t really come as too great of a surprise. But still…a little credit where credit was due, please? His Shakespeare teacher would have been proud of that one.

Then, Larxene started laughing hysterically at the comment and Roxas didn’t have to turn around—not that he even would have been able to if he’d tried—to know that Axel was now staring at him like he’d just waltzed on stage at Carnegie Hall in a neon green tutu. No, that much was obvious and not what was suddenly unsettling him. The problem was the minute groan and tiny yelp of surprise that came from somewhere outside of his cramped little box.

“Marluxia! What the hell do you think you’re doing? Get away from me, you freakish, pink-haired sex-addict!” That…was definitely Vexen’s voice. And much to Roxas’s horror, he was soon greeted with a reminder of how his own “awakening” had gone. An exactly word for word reminder, too.

“Shit, Vexen! Stop moving, damn it! You’re gonna break my dick off if you squirm like that!” Marluxia was in pain by the tone of his voice and there was the sound of a small scuffle before a huffed grunt of acquiescence sounded that more than likely came from the longhaired blonde. Annoyed chatter that was clearly arguing between the two men and Larxene ensued and Roxas’s panicked mind soon blocked it out.

Roxas paled visibly, his stomach turning over in foreboding knots of nausea, and he could feel Axel stiffen beneath him, and certainly not in the good way. Wait… Roxas abruptly slapped himself in the face, much to Axel’s surprise, before beginning to berate himself mentally. Bad Roxas! What the fuck is wrong with you? There is no good way!

“Axel, you jackoff! Get out of me!” Roxas restrained a wince from the utter and complete wrongness of that entire statement before renewing his struggles to get away from the groaning redhead. Roxas moved forward as far as possible but Larxene had done a job on this box or cage or whatever they were in because as far as he leaned, even plastering himself to the side wall wasn’t far enough for him to remove himself from Axel.

He jerked and Axel gave a loud yelp of pain before large hands clamped tightly on Roxas’s hips and pulled him back down into Axel’s lap roughly. Roxas’s eyes widened and he released an involuntary cry of pleasure as Axel’s action brought the head of his erection slamming right into his prostate that had already been stimulated by all of their previous movement. Roxas’s fingers twitched spasmodically, as did the muscles in his butt, and he reached forward to claw desperately for some sort of handhold to control his body.

Roxas could just feel the beginning of the sting of tears at the corner of his eyes and before he could prevent it, a tiny drop had fallen from his cheek to land on one of Axel’s splayed legs. Roxas clenched his eyelids tightly shut and swore to himself. Damn it…he didn’t want this! Not like this!

Hell, if it got him out of this situation, Roxas was willing to admit that he’d been attracted to Axel in an extremely non-platonic manner since he’d first laid eyes on the man. Sure, his wet dreams for the past two or so years had been filled with visions of pale skin, fire-engine red hair, and brilliant viridian eyes, but that didn’t mean he wanted this sort of thing! Ok, well scratch that, he did want this, just not in the way it was happening. He wanted the time to get to know Axel first, gradually becoming something more than a friend. God, he was being such a girl!

Roxas hadn’t realized his tears had been coming in faster torrents until he was suddenly surrounded by thin, yet unsurprisingly strong arms. “Roxy, it’s all right. Look, I’m so sorry. I never wanted for this to happen like this.” Axel’s voice washed over him warmly and as much as he didn’t want to admit it, it was soothing and he relaxed back slightly into the embrace. Unfortunately, Axel shifted to accommodate him more easily and that brought Roxas’s mind zipping speedily back to the feeling of the man inside of him.

“Look, can’t you just…remove yourself or something?” Roxas asked weakly, unable to put in any further effort as all of his frustrations had worn him out. Axel seemed hesitant and Roxas tensed up as he felt a small kiss placed on the back of his neck.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t without really hurting myself. I’m too big.” Axel paused before chuckling nervously. “That…was probably one of the most awkward things I’ve ever done. Apologizing for the size of my dick. Insane.” He was muttering to himself and Roxas felt an oddly hysterical giggle bubbling up. Fuck…guys did not giggle!

It disappeared in a snap though as loud groans were suddenly heard and Roxas and Axel focused in on them. Roxas nearly died a little death when he caught some of the breathlessly moaned words.

“Aah…Ah! Zexion! Oh God, yes! Nnngh! Zexion!” They weren’t so much moans at this point as they were full out declarations of pleasure. Much to Roxas’s horror, the increasingly familiar voice was answered by none other than Zexion himself who seemed to be continuously groaning out the word ‘Demyx’ like it was his new mantra.

“That fucking bastard!” Roxas screamed though his voice did nothing to stop the sounds of the two men’s lovemaking. He was going to kill Zexion! At least once he figured out how to get out of this damn box!

“Roxas, chill! You’re going to make this worse than it already is!” Axel’s frantic voice greeted him and Roxas twisted his head over his shoulder to glare at the redhead who was quickly becoming a literal pain in his ass.

“That fucker is fucking my fucking brother! Don’t tell me to fucking chill! And why are you still up my ass? I told you to get out!” Axel rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to respond caustically when the entirely amused voice of Larxene addressed them.

“Boys, if you want to know the name of this game, all you have to do is follow Demyx and Zexion’s path.” Silence greeted her yet it was a contemplative one and a wicked smirk spread across her lips. “Basically, you want to get out of the box, you both have to cum.”

“WHAT?!” The enraged snarls of both Vexen and Roxas echoed out in sync, not nearly loud enough to cover the sudden pleasure-ridden moan that ripped from Demyx’s mouth as he no doubt came, followed by a lower, much softer groan from Zexion as he did the same. Digging a hand in her pocket to pull out the key, Larxene successfully ignored the irate death threats and strode over to the locked box that contained the two satiated males.

Clicking the key in place and unlocking the trapdoor, she stepped back and said, “You guys can get out now. Thankfully, you two are smart enough to notice the perfect opportunity when it hits you. Nicely done. So you can either leave now or wait for the rest of the entertainment to come to their own realizations. What’ll it be?”

Zexion appeared to be adamantly ignoring her but a lecherous grin had found it’s way onto Demyx’s face, contradicting his furious blush, and he replied, “Definitely staying. I want to see what happens next.” The men clambered out of the box with a bit of difficulty before Larxene passed them their clothes and a couple damp towels. They quickly dressed after cleaning up as best as possible before glancing over to the other lockboxes.

“Soooo…who’s over there?” Demyx asked curiously, having previously been so involved in Zexion that he hadn’t taken the time to attempt to identify the voices that had been screaming earlier. The boxes were oddly quiet now, as though the people inside were listening intently to what was going on on the outside.

Larxene grinned. “A few people who should finally get it through their thick skulls that they belong together. Marluxia and Vexen are in the one on the right and Axel and Roxas are in the left box.” It was Zexion’s turn to speak at last.

“I have 50 munny that says Marluxia and Vexen manage to get out first before Axel and Roxas.” Demyx stared at his new boyfriend incredulously while Larxene simply laughed.

“Deal.” Zexion and Larxene shook on it before Demyx turned and shouted to the remaining people.

“Come on, guys! You heard Larxene! Now get it on!” There was obvious disgruntled silence from Marluxia and Vexen who seemed to simply be thinking while an outraged yell of betrayal came from Roxas.

“Demyx, you traitor! How could you? You’re my brother! It doesn’t bother you that I’m practically being ass-raped against my will here?” A squeak followed the words as something in the box shifted.

“Against your will, Roxy? I think that massive hard-on you’re sporting begs to differ.” Axel’s words virtually reeked of his leering smile and an incoherent sputtering came from the short blonde and Demyx just grinned.

“He’s totally right, Roxy.” Demyx practically purred the nickname. “You should stop trying to lie to yourself. Don’t think I haven’t seen those sketches of Axel in your art book. They couldn’t possibly be so detailed if you didn’t spend minutes upon hours of every day staring at the guy.”

“Sh—Shut up! Shut up, you jerk!” Demyx could just see the mortified blush that was currently gracing his little brother’s face. It more than likely went all the way down his neck because, you know, it probably wasn’t terribly justified for Demyx to inadvertently reveal Roxas’s crush to the world when said crush currently held his straight-laced little brother within his clutches in every way possible.

“Zexion, come here a second.” Vexen’s breathless voice sounded above Roxas’s ranting and the slate-haired man moved towards it.

“You need something, Vex?” Zexion stopped in front of the container and attempted to picture Vexen so he had a face to talk to rather than seemingly making a fool of himself by talking to a box.

“You got out of the box by…cumming?” Zexion, though contrary to his nature, couldn’t help the tiny smirk that came upon him as he listened to Vexen struggle to say the word. Oh god, this was so amusing. He’d have to thank Larxene later.

“That would be correct.” There was a pause in his speech before a downright spiteful streak came over him. “Vexen, I don’t really see how this is a bad deal for you. You told me you’ve been in love with the freak for ages and I always tried to be understanding whenever you turned him away but really, can you honestly come out of this without dating each other?” Zexion mentally licked a finger and tallied the air, awarding himself a point as he heard Marluxia’s sharp intake of breath and Vexen’s significant silence.

“You…are an asshole, Zexion. Fuck you.” Vexen replied stiffly.

“No, I think you’re confused. That would be Marluxia doing that for you.” His smug grin was audible in his tone but he was soon ignored as a conversation began from within the contraption.

“Wait…you’ve actually liked me this entire time?” Marluxia’s disbelief was obvious and he practically whined, “Then why have you always turned me down?” When Vexen ignored the question, Zexion answered for him.

“He was afraid you only wanted him for his body while he wanted more. He is so very pretty, after all. He’s actually quite the girl about some things when he wants to be.” Zexion snickered evilly and his lips turned up into an even wider smirk than before.

“Again. Asshole.” Vexen growled darkly before movement in the box created a short yelp of surprise from the longhaired blonde.

“Wait, let me get this straight first.” Marluxia said in confusion, trying to adjust himself into a more comfortable upright position. “You’ve liked me this entire time and the only reason you always turned me down was because you were scared?” A pause of uncomfortable silence and then, “That’s the biggest load of bullshit ever! I wouldn’t ask you out as a steady boyfriend if I wasn’t in it for the long haul!”

“You know what, Marluxia? Just shut up and fuck me so we can get out of here. We can talk later.” Vexen gritted out through his teeth.

“Fine, I can deal with that but we are definitely talking later. You’re not getting off so easily this time.” Marluxia said in a slightly chastising manner as he pushed his hips upward experimentally.

Vexen released a soft moan at the feeling and couldn’t stop himself from replying back, “I certainly hope you don’t make it easy.” Marluxia’s movements paused for a second before he chuckled.

“If that’s what you want, I’m more than happy to comply. Just remember, you asked for it.”

Zexion took a stumbling couple of steps away from the box towards the stunned Larxene and Demyx as a loud shout of pleasure erupted from Vexen. “Oh god, yes. Just like that!”

Demyx turned to Zexion and gulped slightly, eyeing his new boyfriend’s form with growing need. “That’s…just...” Zexion didn’t need another second and Larxene gaped as the men practically attacked her. It was the hottest thing she’d ever seen, Demyx and Zexion making out heatedly with Marluxia and Vexen’s sounds as the background.

Meanwhile, Roxas was shivering with anger and unwanted pleasure. The sounds and conversations were finally getting to him and his inner walls clenched a few times over Axel’s length. Axel groaned softly, trying to will himself to not just take Roxas hard. It would finally get them out of the box and let him have some much needed release.

A few minutes later, Roxas moaned at the sound of Vexen and Marluxia climaxing together. Never had he thought he’d be so aroused simply by the sounds of sex. Unconsciously, he wriggled back against the redhead who ground up at him in reflex. The movement made Roxas pause. God, he wanted it, he really did, but it didn’t seem right.

“All right, boys. Everyone is out except for you two so either get it on or plan for a very long stay. I do have to go to classes some time, you know.” Larxene grinned around her words and the rest of the group echoed her sentiments. Roxas stiffened slightly as Axel’s arms tightened about his waste and the redhead’s lips rested against his head.

“Roxy, how about we give the perverts a show? And when all this shit is over, I’ll take you out for dinner.” Axel muttered quietly into Roxas’s ear, lipping at the earlobe gently. “We’ll call it a date and we can always do it again.”

Roxas shifted slightly to stare at Axel in surprise. “You’re…serious? You’d date me?” Axel’s grin was all telling and Roxas couldn’t help the happy grin of his own that formed. He bent slightly further over his shoulder and pressed his lips firmly against the redhead’s who all too willing responded.

Axel rolled his hips upward into Roxas’s tight heat and finally allowed himself to enjoy the sensation. His tongue dipped between the boy’s lips and he ran it teasingly along the pallet of Roxas’s mouth, earning a delicious shiver from the blonde that transferred directly down to his groin, making him go even harder. He released Roxas’s mouth in preference for sucking on the blonde’s pulse point and hearing his moans of ecstasy.

Roxas found himself in heaven now that he was suddenly a willing participant in this twisted game and he pushed back against Axel’s rhythmic, upward thrusts. He whined when Axel’s erection rubbed against his prostate and out of the blue, Roxas realized he couldn’t seem to get enough of the feeling. He drove himself back harder and Axel groaned along with Roxas’s satisfied hum.

“A—Axel…so good. Oh my god…harder.” Roxas pleaded with the redhead and he was too far gone to even notice the quintet of sharp gasps outside. He slammed himself back in unison with Axel’s pounding and the taller man’s large hands held onto his hips to guide him back into just the right place to give both of them maximum pleasure.

Axel hissed quietly as he concentrated on the feel of his shaft being rubbed consistently and the recurring clenching of Roxas’s pelvic muscles brought out even more satisfaction. He could feel the tightening in his balls and he reached down to wrap his sweat-slicked fingers around Roxas’s weeping erection.

Roxas threw his head back against Axel’s shoulder and both of his hands came up to grip tightly onto haphazard spikes. A silent scream surface on his lips when Axel stroked him and the dual feelings of Axel’s hand and cock were too much for him as he came with a loud cry of rapture exploding from his mouth, his cum hitting the side of the box and running down Axel’s hand at the same time.

Axel grunted in surprise at the unbelievably harsh wave of spasms in Roxas’s lower body and he fastened his lips to the blonde who continued to cry out into his mouth as the redhead came hard, Roxas’s muscles milking him for all he was worth.

Both young men broke apart when they’d somewhat come down from their high and Axel trailed soft kisses up Roxas’s exposed neck, the blonde’s head lolled backwards on his shoulder, limp and compliant. “That…” Roxas breathed wearily, unable to finish his sentence. Axel smirked against his skin.

“That…is something we will definitely be doing again, preferably soon.” Roxas gave him a small, indulgent smile and nodded, sparkling blue eyes closing sleepily. Axel was perfectly content to let him, too, until light spilled in on them both, alerting them to their audience. Both of them glared up at a surprisingly pale Larxene.

“Uh…well, I suppose you guys are good now. Hey, Roxas, your brother passed out from a massive nosebleed listening to you. Anything special we should do?” Larxene asked carefully, watching the look of revelation appear on the blonde’s face.

Roxas planted his feet on the ground carefully and lifted himself to a standing position, both him and Axel moaning and closing their eyes slightly as Axel was finally removed from Roxas like they’d originally wanted. Roxas’s gaze flickered over to the rest of the group. Zexion was on the ground, gently fanning his brother and Vexen was at least making a half-hearted attempt to appear as though he was turning down Marluxia’s horny advances.

Roxas tried to lift a foot to step out but a sharp pain shot up his spine and he stumbled against the side of it. Long arms wrapped around his waist before his face could meet the floor and he rested his hands against Axel’s, wincing slightly as the pain dulled when he was taken slightly off of his feet. “Thanks.” He muttered in meek embarrassment. Axel shrugged.

“Hey, it was your first time. Even if you aren’t a girl, it’s gonna hurt some and that usually happens afterwards. You’ll get used to it.” Roxas nodded and gripped Axel’s arms tighter as the tall man bodily lifted his much shorter frame from the box before stepping out behind him, still supporting the majority of his weight.

“So now that we’re all out and have the freedom of movement, I say we maim Larxene.” Vexen stated calmly, though his eyes glinted with something decidedly malicious. Larxene rolled her eyes.

“Oh, come on. Have a sense of humor!” She sniggered, earning disbelieving stares from everyone.

“A sense of humor?” Demyx, who’d finally come out of his blood loss-instilled stupor, shouted incredulously. “You locked us in tiny boxes and forced us to have sex with each other just to escape all because of a stupid bet and you have the nerve to tell us that we should have a sense of humor! What the hell is wrong with you?”

“I’m the matchmaker to top all matchmakers. My word is law. If a bet has me saying I’d get you all together, then I’d do it.” Larxene eyed them all with a lascivious grin and stated, “Besides, you can’t possibly tell me you didn’t enjoy that. You all sounded like you were positively in ecstasy.”

All of the blondes flushed in embarrassment while Marluxia cocked an eyebrow at the woman. “Well, that’s all good but what was in this for you? I mean, other than hearing six men get off on each other. I know about your Yaoi fetish.”

Larxene smiled wickedly and twirled her finger in midair pointlessly. “Not much really. Well, aside from the fact that I got the opportunity to manhandle all of you punkasses in order to get you in the boxes.” Silence greeted her words and she did a triumphant little countdown in her head. 3…2…1…

“Shit! I completely didn’t even think about that!” Demyx yelped and Roxas fell back limply against Axel’s chest, unable to think through his humiliation. The redhead scowled darkly at Larxene while Vexen and Zexion held their blushing faces in their hands.

“You really are sick and twisted, you know that, Larxene?” Axel spat.

“Why, thank you.” She purred with a tainted smile. “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“That still doesn’t excuse what you did to us, Larxene.” Vexen grumbled, finally assenting to Marluxia’s arms around his torso. “Most of us normal people like to get to know each other before that sort of thing happens.”

Larxene snorted at his statement before waving her hand in dismissal. “Whatever, you enjoyed yourself.”

A loud bark of laughter sounded from Roxas and every looked at the short blonde. He leaned back happily into Axel’s embrace, blue eyes glittering blissfully as he said, “Oh please, Vexen. Try to be serious here. Larxene is totally right.”

“I am?” She stared at him in confusion and he grinned at her and nodded.

“Mhm. After all, conversation is for heterosexuals.”

—Owari—