Thousand Miles From Nowhere

Sort of sad, but sweet.

RVB still ain't mine, and neither is the song (Dwight Yoakam's "Thousand Miles From Nowhere")
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Church walked the path alone - the same path he'd walked a million times before. He paid little attention to his surroundings (thus defeating the purpose of his patrol, but he cared none), focusing inward on all the wounds Tex had inflicted on his heart and ego.

I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
Time don't matter to me
'Cause I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
And there's no place I wanna be

He'd lost track of how long he had been wandering, in some sort of autonomous haze. What did it matter? He and Tex had fought, and he'd lost. Plain and simple.

I got heartaches in my pocket
I got echoes in my head
And all that I keep hearing
Are the cruel, cruel things that you said

As he walked, slowly plotting a course back to the base, all the insults and accusations she'd flung at him rattled around in his brain - words that had once been terms of endearment between them were now used in anger, to hurt.

I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
Time don't matter to me
'Cause I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
And there's no place I wanna be

Within the confines of her room, Tex was processing the nasty fight she'd had with Church. She hadn't meant to hurt him, she really hadn't. But, the words she had chosen were the only way to get through to him, to make him see what their constant arguing was doing to her. Honey, I'm so sorry...how can I make it up to you? she wondered.

Oh, I....

I got bruises on my memory
I got tear stains on my hands
And in the mirror there's a vision
Of what used to be a man

Emerging from the shower, Church stood before the mirror, staring almost unseeing at his own reflection. What's the use? She'd probably never take me back anyway. Not even if I begged. Shaking his head, as if to clear his mind of the thoughts, he finished drying off, and trudged off to his room.

I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
Time don't matter to me
'Cause I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
And there's no place I wanna be

Church and Tex lay in their respective bunks, thinking almost identical thoughts: We belong together. I should go apologize right now, and maybe we can end this fight. Oh, who am I kidding? That wouldn't work. Or maybe it's crazy enough that it just MIGHT work... Church rolled off his bunk, opened his door, and started making his way down the hall, in the general direction of Tex's room. Rounding the corner, he almost ran headlong into Tex, her eyes damp and cheeks flushed from crying. Both of them started speaking at once:

"I was just coming to-" Church began.
"I was on my way to-" Tex stammered.

"You first," they said, in unison.

Being a gentleman (and slightly nervous) Church allowed Tex to proceed first. Crossing her arms to hide the fact that her hands were shaking, she hesitantly began explaining what was on her mind. "I know we've been arguing an awful lot lately, and that this one was by far the worst we've had. But, the reason it was so bad was that I couldn't seem to make you see what all our arguing was doing to me. It hurts, so much. I got frustrated, and lashed out at you, trying to make you see how much it hurts, the last way I knew how to get through to you. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have done that. I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me."

Church stood in almost stunned silence for a moment, allowing the reality of what Tex had just said to sink in. Tex's tension grew as she waited for his reply, and was instantly relieved when he said, "I'm sorry, too. I shouldn't have provoked an argument. Hell, I shouldn't EVER have argued with you. We should have talked about things. I shouldn't have stormed out like that. I really should be thanking you for the kick in the ass you gave me - you got me to see things clearly. I forgive you...can you forgive me?"

"All's forgiven," Tex said, wrapping her arms around Church, pulling him close for a soft, sweet kiss. They held each other tightly for a moment, happy to be back in each other's arms.

I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
Time don't matter to me
'Cause I'm a thousand miles from nowhere
And there's no place I wanna be...

Laying together, legs intertwined, arms around each other, Church and Tex hovered on the edge of sleep, thoroughly exhausted from their standard practice of "making up". Church thought drowsily to himself Damn, that was good. It's just too bad it took all that fighting to get it. Hmm...I'll bet we can make it that good again sometime, only without the fighting... As Tex fell asleep next to him, he whispered to her, "There's nowhere else I'd rather be than here with you. I love you." Closing his eyes, the image of Tex fresh in his mind, he fell asleep.