Devil Mail

By: Aryun

folder +A through F › Devil May Cry

Rating: Adult +

Chapters: 1

Views: 1,994

Reviews: 1

Recommended: 0

Currently Reading: 0

Category: +A through F › Devil May Cry

Rating: Adult +

Chapters: 1

Views: 1,994

Reviews: 1

Recommended: 0

Currently Reading: 0

Disclaimer: I do not own the Devil May Cry game series, nor any of the characters from it. I do not make any money from the writing of this story.

Devil Mail

Title: Devil Mail

Author: Me AKA Cat

Summary: Total Randomness on my part

Rating: PG

Pairing(s): None really

Characters: Dante

Disclaimer: I don't own DMC or anything else you recognize, nor will I ever. I did this purely for fun and to pass time. I make no money from this. The only person I own is the OC and the plot!

Author's Notes: Well, this is just some little stupid thing that I wrote
because it just got in my head and wouldn't go away. =P Muses can be a pain in
your butt.

Anyway, this is Dante writing an email to one of his devil huntin' pals. I
dunno why, or even who, but it was funny at the time...

Then again, everything's a little funny when you get home at 3 AM
sometimes...

~ Cat

Subj: Chillin' in a harem...

To: DNC@DNC.com

From: DevilTriggered_Dante@DNC.com

Yo' babe!

So I'm stuck in this harem thing, and I can't seem to get my ass
outta it. Funny, you think there'd be chicks all over the place.. but
this is a guy harem... most freaky.

The few chicks that are here are pains in my ass. I mean, it's
not every day that I get shot down by a pretty lady... Man, they're
bitches... 'specially that little blonde chick that runs the place...
Although I like her musical tastes... she's too hung up on that one
guy... wassisname... Beddy... Birdy... Naw, that ain't it...

I dunno... it could be worse. Hell, I mean a lot worse. I
could be stuck under Mundus... Now that would seriously suck to be his
bed buddy...

Eh, might as well make the best of it... That other silver haired
guy's pretty cool... we mosh sometimes and it can get ugly, but he's
cool. He's the chick's babe... or so it seems. He'll put his head in her
lap and just lay there as she pets him...

God, seems like he's treated like a dog, not a man...

If he likes it, then I guess I'm cool. I mean, he told me that chick
will warm up with time. She's just annoyed at the moment because things
keep going wrong...

Evidently she founded this harem for the sole purpose of helping
people like him... Ya'know, abused by fangirls, and guys even... He's
been here since she founded this place...

He said he had walked in hell and lived... after being around him, I
kinda believe it...

Anyway, babe, I ought to go... Seems the chick wants to talk to me.
'bout what I've no clue. I've been good since I got here... well, as
good as a handsome devil like me can be...

Um... And by the way, never pinch her ass... you might get punched
across the room.

Happy Axing!

Dante Sparda

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