Lara Croft

and the Curse of the Jade Kitten

Story Codes:
Self-Insertion
Mind Control
Nudity

"The majority of all archaeology is done in the library." Lara grunted, rubbing her temples, piles of ancient texts spread out in front of her. "That doesn't make the research any easier." She craned her neck from side to side, popping the vertebrae to get the kinks out. "So far I've had to learn four new languages on this search, and I'm still no closer to finding the Jade Kitten." She noticed the arrival of an American, dressed in a red T-shirt with the words "thrill seeker" printed on the front, a black leather jacket, blue jeans, white sneakers, and sunglasses, with unkempt red hair and fair, freckled skin, carrying what looked like a painting under one arm. He noticed her noticing him, and smiled, approaching her table.

"Lady Lara Croft, I presume?" the American asked, extending a hand. "My friends call me D.W. I believe we're both looking for the Jade Kitten."

"And how did you come to that conclusion?" Lara asked. D.W. gently tapped an illuminated manuscript before her, clearly showing the Kitten.

"You look tired." D.W. said. "Would you like to combine our efforts?"

"No, thanks." Lara replied. "I'm doing just fine on my own."

"Suit yourself." D.W. replied, leaving her table and heading for the window. Lara, prodded by her curiosity, followed.

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"I thought you didn't want my help?"

"Just satisfying my curiosity." Lara replied.

"Well, you do recall that this library is a converted church, yes?" D.W. asked, priming his surprise.

"I gathered that much in my research." Lara said.

"Well, the church was built on some ancient burial chambers which, over the centuries, changed hands between various Pagan tribes. The bishops disguised the entrance to the catacombs to hide it from curious members of their congregation, but awaited the Pope's order to destroy the catacombs--thankfully, it's an order which never came."

"You're saying the clue we're looking for is under the library?" Lara asked.

"You sure you don't want to team up?" D.W. asked.

"A woman's perogative is to change her mind." Lara replied. D.W. laughed, removing the cover from the painting he'd brought.

"I bought this a few days ago." he said, holding it up beside the stained-glass window.

"It's the same window!" Lara exclaimed.

"Bingo." D.W. said. "Now let's see..." He pointed to a pair of numerals on the painting, then matching numerals on either side of the window. "One and two..." he said. He pointed out a numeral on the opposite wall. "Three...I guess we connect the dots then?" Lara noticed something on the floor. "What's the highest number on that painting?"

"Ten, why?" D.W. asked, following her gaze. "Oh." he said, when he saw the Roman numeral ten, in the form of a giant red X between the reference desk and the classical literature section. "Damn, I can NOT believe I missed that!"

"I would have missed it too if I hadn't seen Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade six times." Lara replied. "Of course, all work and no play can do that to a person." She pulled her guns from their holdsters and shot out the center of the X, leaving a gaping hole.

"Feeling better?" D.W. asked.

"Much." Lara replied, sliding down into the hole until she dangled by her hands, and then letting go. D.W. followed, leaving the painting behind. Lara shone her flashlight down a long corridor curtained with spider webs. Parting them with her hands before proceeding, she headed down the corridor until it forked. "Hmmm...the markings on this side are most definitely Christian." she said, running her fingers over the right side of the catacombs. "They're far more recent too. The ones on the left are Pagan runes."

"Look here." D.W. said, shining his light into a small burial chamber. "The wall's not solid like the others. I wonder if..." He kicked at the wall until it gave, but it only gave enough to get his foot stuck. He blushed, while Lara laughed at his predicament. It felt good to laugh after all her hard work. She slammed her shoulder into the wall and tumbled down an inclined tunnel which dumped her unceremoniously into a large empty chamber. Her sunglasses were broken, but it didn't matter. She could see better without them anyway. Stepping slowly forward, she found that the floor was littered with little triggers hidden under ancient rat skins. The little holes in the sides of the chamber indicated the kind of traps they were connected to. The room was illuminated by a thin shaft of light that crossed just over the altar, where a small, green object sat regally like an idol.

"The Jade Kitten!" Lara exclaimed. She crept carefully over the boobytrapped floor, and ascended the steps via the stone border rather than the stairs themselves, fearing more traps hidden in the stone tiles. The top of the altar was a solid slab of marble, and Lara carefully lifted the Kitten from its resting place, sighing in relief that there was no pressure-switch. She raised the Kitten further, pausing to admire its adorable lines.

"Lara, no!" D.W. exclaimed. The Jade Kitten refracted the beams of the little shaft of light, shining them into Lara's eyes and dazzling her. "Lara, the Kitten..." D.W. began, but stopped when he noticed the traps in the floor.

"Lara...the Kitten." Lara repeated, dazzled by the beams shining in her eyes. "Lara the Kitten." she purred happily. D.W. hopped over the trap switches and ran up the side of the steps.

"Lara. The Kitten. Give me the Kitten." D.W. said. "Do as I say!"

"Do as you say...give...kitten...Lara the Kitten...give...Lara the Kitten...to you." Lara mumbled, her mind still entrapped by the spell of the Jade Kitten. D.W. grabbed the jewel from Lara's relaxing hands and pocketed it. Blinking her eyes, Lara lay down on her back and curled up, purring happily.

"Lara, get up!" D.W. said. Obediently, Lara sat up kitten-style. D.W. got down on his knees and touched the side of her face. She nuzzled him affectionately, purring softly.

"Lara the Kitten...give Lara the Kitten to you...Do as you say..." she muttered. "Give myself to you. Do as you say." she repeated these two sentences over and over, like a mantra. D.W. smiled.

A few hours later, D.W. and Lara were in an American hotel room. Lara lay on the floor completely naked, batting playfully at a piece of string D.W. dangled above her.

"I went to Europe expecting to find a rare jewel." D.W. said, reflecting. "I never expected to get a loving pet in the process. Say my name again, kitten."

"Master." Lara purred.

"I never get tired of hearing that." D.W. said with a grin.

End.