Paying the Price

Paying the Price

Chapter Nine

How long had she been out? Shepard didn't know, but as consciousness returned and her limbs regained feeling, she began to realize just how badly beat up she was.

Everything ached, from her toes to her head. And as she became more aware of her surroundings, she offered a weak groan, her hands flexing instinctively as she tried to fight off the numbness that had crept into her extremities.

She noted only vaguely at her left hand was closed around something, something that gently squeezed it in response. Had she been more aware, she'd have laughed at the thought of someone holding her hand while she was passed out on the deck.

No, that didn't feel right, the deck was hard and solid, as she shifted very slightly, whatever she was laying on was soft and comfortable. She'd been moved, likely to a bed at some point.

"She's waking up!" A voice, distant and echoing made her cringe slightly, somehow she felt like she'd attained a hangover during the past few…However long she was out for. Every tiny sound made her already aching head that much worse.

"About time, I was beginning to think we'd lost her again." Another voice, this one a little clearer and unlike the first, it lacked that weird sound behind it. Her head was to screwed up to figure out what the sound was called.

Her eyes finally cracked open. Only to slam shut again a second later as she was dazzled by the blinding lights above her. Instead of trying to open them again, she decided to try speaking instead. Though she soon discovered her throat was dry and she couldn't muster anything louder then a barely audible whisper.

"Get her some water." She heard the first voice say, now that she could focus a little more, she recognized it, Garrus.

She made another attempt to open her eyes, though this time her lids proved too heavy, and refused to budge. "Stats are dropping, were losing her." Darkness swiftly crept back into her mind.

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Miranda sighed heavily as she studied Shepard. The commander had woken up, briefly, but things were not going well. Doctor Chakwas had shown the Cerberus agent the diagnostic and it hadn't been pretty.

"It's a wonder she's even still breathing." She remembered saying after scanning through the list of damages. Had it not been for all the implants and synthetics they'd had to use to rebuild her, she wouldn't have even survived half of what she'd gone through, let alone live to tell the tale.

Or rather, might, live. She corrected herself; Shepard was still in bad shape even now. It would be a miracle if se made it through the night.

Then again, if anyone would perform a miracle, it'd be Shepard, wouldn't it?

She spared a glance towards the side of the bed. Much like herself, Garrus had been given the report, and hadn't left Melina's side since he'd carried her to the med bay. Despite several people's insistence, he'd refused to leave. Miranda herself was reluctant to as well. Though after the first couple of hours she'd given up waiting and simply returned regularly to ensure she was still breathing.

Shaking her head, she decided not to bother distracting the turian, and simply left them alone.

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Garrus didn't even spare the woman a glance as she left the room. Aside from the doctor who was busy doing something at her terminal, it was just the two of them now. The surviving members of the squad had visited once or twice, but for the most part were keeping away. He couldn't blame them.

Seeing the commander in such a sorry state was, heart wrenching to say the least. Though he, like everyone else knew that if anyone would live through this, it'd be Shepard. Hell if she could come back from the dead and lead a second suicide mission with no chance of success and win, then he highly doubted a few broken bones and internal injury's would get the best of her.

"You really should get some sleep." He heard Chakwas say quietly, though he ignored her, he wouldn't leave until he was absolutely certain she'd still be there when he came back.

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A week had passed before Shepard had been deemed *safe*, her condition finally improving enough that they could confirm she was going to survive, though it would likely be a while longer before she was up and moving, let alone able to fight.

Again she was blinded by the lights as she tried to open her eyes, and offered a quiet growl that only hurt her throat as she tried to lift her hand to shield her eyes. Much like before though, she discovered her limbs were heavy and numb.

"She's awake again!" She heard Garrus call out, and the sound of someone moving closer to the bed, though she didn't pay them much heed.

"Dim the lights. I'm going blind here." She finally managed to mutter as another failed attempt to open her eyes failed. Luckily each time it was getting better.

Third times the charm it seemed as she finally managed to open her eyes a little and keep them open. Eventually she managed to blink them back into focus. "How are you feeling commander?"

Melina's gaze shifted slightly to focus on the person who spoke, after a few moments she recognized the doctor and offered a weak smile. "Like I got tackled by a krogan…" She managed to mutter.

"Well, considering what you've been through, I think that would be a more pleasant outcome." Shepard chuckled at that, though this only led to a coughing fit as her ribs reacted painfully to the action.

She only became aware of Garrus' presence when he gently squeezed her hand again, and her gaze shifted slightly to him next. "How long you been sitting there?" She asked, her voice slurring slightly as the drugs that should have been keeping her sedated began to take effect.

"About a week…" He shrugged slightly, and she couldn't help but wince at the comment even though her mind was getting foggy due to the painkillers.

"A week? How long have I been out?"

"A week" he repeated, and she groaned again.

"Great…"

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Two hours later, and Shepard had finally talked Doctor Chakwas into letting her leave the medbay. Now that she was awake, she was eager to get back to work, even if she couldn't fight, she had to see for herself that everything was running smoothly.

Of course it hadn't been easy to convince the doctor she was alright to move. And in the end she'd been forced to agree to taking Garrus with her, and he'd been given the order that if she so much as coughed, he had to bring her back and not let her leave until further notice.

Shepard didn't protest though, she was greatful for the worry, but at the same time she couldn't deny the fact that she hated being confined to her bed. Even if it meant suffering a bad limp and having her left arm in a cast for the next three days at best.

Apparently the implants she'd been given enhanced her healing somewhat, and she'd make a full recovery soon enough. She was glad to hear it, though still had issues with the news.

Sure she'd survived and would be fighting fit soon enough. But what about Tali, Jacob, Mordin and Thane? They hadn't been so lucky, and as she carefully wandered the ship, stopping to greet each crew member, she realized just how…Empty the ship felt now.

The lab was devoid of life, the terminal Tali always worked at was unmanned and lifeless…

Yeah, she survived, but it cost her more dearly then she wanted to admit.

Zaeed, stubborn as ever had made a full recovery, his wounds not even being remotely as bad as her own. And Legion, despite having parts of his armour melted and a large portion of circuits fried by the EMP from the nuke, was still functioning and had salvaged some spare equipment to fix himself with.

And everyone else had only received minor injury's and had been treated.

It still wasn't enough though; she'd lost friends, people that had trusted her with their lives. And she'd failed them. She kept her thoughts to herself however, knowing if she told anyone they'd either assure her it wasn't her fault, or try to get her mind off the subject.

Much like with Ashley, she'd deal with the problems on her own.

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"Shepard, the Illusive Man wants to see you in the debriefing room." Shepard's head jolted up from her desk, blood shot and unfocused eyes spanning towards the intercom.

After a moment she cleared her throat and tapped the button to respond. "Alright. Be there in five." She clicked it off again a few moments later, before shifting back in her seat, a hand moving to rub the back of her neck.

As she stood she spared the clock on her Omni-tool a glance and sighed quietly, she'd been asleep for about two hours, not nearly enough. And before that she'd been drowning her sorrows in a bottle of some potent drink that she was regretting even now.

Staggering to her feet, she swiftly made her way to the elevator and punched the button for the correct deck.

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"Shepard, good to see you're still in one piece." Melina barely hid a cringe as the briefing room transformed into the Illusive Man's office, as per usual he was busy smoking something or other and while she thankfully couldn't smell it, she still felt the familiar disgust at the thought alone.

She really hated smoking, and normally she tolerated people who did, they all had their vices after all, she really didn't like him either, so when combined together, she always hated these meetings.

"Thanks to the doctor. Can't say I feel like I'm in one piece though." Even hours later she still had aches and pains across her body and standing here wasn't helping. She needed to lie down and sleep for a while.

"I'm glad you decided not to destroy the collector base." He simply ignored her response and continued. "The data we can recover from it will prove quite useful in defeating the reapers."

Melina twitched slightly at that. "What exactly do you hope to learn? The only thing I saw in there was the reaper production line. Unless you're hoping to find out how they built them and come up with a weakness form that, I doubt you'll find much."

"I'm sure we'll find some valuable data regardless of what the base is designed to do." Again Shepard felt her hands twitch. Despite his calm and almost dismissive attitude, she couldn't help but feel that had been a stab at her conerns, she was really not in the mood.

"You'd better. I lost a lot of good people trying to take that base. So the last thing I want to hear was that it's worthless."

"Yes, I'm sorry about you're comrades, but their sacrifices will not be in vain, nor will they be forgotten." Melina hesitated for a long moment, and somehow tuned out the rest of his words as he continued. She wasn't paying attention anymore.

Finally she cut him off; her arms crossing as she abruptly spoke. "Remembered? By who exactly? They died to save the damn galaxy, to stop the collectors and delay the reapers. But who is going to remember that? Who's going to know what they accomplished? The alliance doesn't care; the council will just brush it aside like they did with Saren…"

She paused for a moment, before shaking her head. "They died to save the damned galaxy…And no one but us is every going to fucking know…Or care."

The rest of the meeting went by rather swiftly. Must of it being nothing more then his incessant claims of the base assuring human dominance and the like. Everything she'd heard before. Shepard had heard it all before.

Finally she spun on her heel and began to walk away. "Shepard, one last thing." And halted, her hands slowly clenching into fists.

Twisting her upper body, she focused on the Illusive Man once again. "What?"

"I'm sending you the coordinates for one of our research facilities. We've lost contact with it, and I need someone to investigate." Shepard growled quietly before turning fully to face him.

"And why me? I'm barely on my feet as it is. And the Normandy still needs repairs."

"Quite frankly, It's classified, and you're the only one I think can handle the situation if is as bad as I suspect."

Shepard opened her mouth to respond, hesitated for a moment, before snapping it shut and nodding.

"Fine, I'll look into it as soon as the Normandy's repaired."