Pit And The Legendary Ladies

 

Nature Calls

Phos and Lux snorted as they raised their magnificent heads, watching an awestruck Pit approach them with a fierce and unblinking gaze. Palutena walked at his side, curiosity and fascination shaping her features as she appraised the famed Lightning Chariot.

"I never got the chance to look at it properly", she admitted, drawing to a stop and standing close to the Lux, lifting a hand which involuntarily trembled as it tasted the electric aura of the unicorns, "such power", she breathed.

"I...but what is it doing here?" Pit asked as he approached and stood just behind Palutena's shoulder. The Centurion, who had served as messenger and alerted them to the Lightning Chariot's sudden and unexpected arrival before then serving as a guide, approached Pit with a neatly folded sheet of parchment in hand.

"A message, Boss", the Centurion told him, something at which Palutena raised an eyebrow, turning to them.

"For him?"

"Seems to be the case, my Lady", the Centurion replied, inclining his head as he showed the note to the Goddess before handing it off to Pit. Pit's name was scrawled in elegant, loopy handwriting across the front of the note.

"From who?" she asked, making to snatch it away from Pit, who jumped backwards with a look of affront on his face.

"Hey! People want to talk to me too, you know!"

"Of course they do, Pit. I'm sorry", Palutena said, lowering her hand and her eyes apologetically. Pit, not expecting an apology, opened his mouth uncertainly before deciding that he had no idea what to say in response and turning his attention back to the note.

"Yoink!"

Pit cried out again as Palutena pinched the note from his fingers, dancing out of his reach as she flipped it open.

"That's mine!" Pit said, running forward to take it from her, and she let him take it from her as she raised an eyebrow once more.

"Evidently", she said, looking across at the Lightning Chariot and its glorious steeds, "your presence is desired, it seems. Alone".

Pit took the note, his eyes narrowing as he passed them over a single line of words.

"Umm, what does it say?" he asked a moment later, growing red with embarrassment.

"'I have something for you, Pit. I'm sending the Lightning Chariot to pick you up.'"

"Okay", Pit said uncertainly, looking down at the elegant scrawl once more, "but who is it from?"

"Phosphora", Palutena replied, turning to favour him with a smile he couldn't read.

"Oh", Pit said, his face warming as he tugged at the neck of his chiton, "well, can I...?"

"Of course", Palutena said, throwing her hand casually into the air, "I don't think Phosphora will serve as a danger to you, now that the war is over. I'm sure Viridi keeps her reigned in".

"Oh, thank you", Pit said, "wait. You're actually letting me go alone?"

Palutena merely smiled as she lightly patted the side of the chariot itself.

"Run along now, Pit. It is highly improper to keep a lady waiting. Come, Centurion", she said as she turned away from the Chariot, leaving Pit looking from her to it to the note clutched in his hands, anticipation rising along with the heat that flushed his cheeks.

---

Phos and Lux easily pulled the Chariot and its awed passenger through the turbulent storm clouds perpetually drawn tight around what he immediately recognised to be the Thunder Cloud Temple. The journey had been a blur, literally. Pit had been holding onto the reigns of the Chariot's steeds more to stop himself from being thrown clear of the thing rather than to exhibit any kind of control over it. Phos and Lux clearly knew where they were going. Pit vaguely remembered Phosphora promising to look after the Chariot after he had used it to break through Palutena's barrier, and it seemed she had really held true to her words and was maintaining the steeds and their vessel rather well.

The Chariot cycled once around the Temple that had fallen into disrepair long before Phosphora had originally made it her resting place after defeating Thanatos. She had brought it back to life, so to speak, through the use of crystal-like generators, powering the Temple with her electricity. Pit then, having destroyed those generators, expected to find the Temple returned to its sad, broken state; however, as the Chariot flew lower, Pit saw the familiar glint of generators, located in several points that he didn't have the time to verify. He could be sure though that Phosphora had decided to make the Thunder Cloud Temple her permanent home.

The Chariot drew to a stop just outside the original entrance of the Temple that Pit remembered having entered with, shortly afterwards almost electrocuting himself on the charged barriers Phosphora had erected along his path. Stepping off the Chariot somewhat shakily, Pit turned to Phos and Lux, not sure whether or not he should thank them, or wait around until someone came to retrieve them. Glancing behind him towards the Temple, however, it seemed as though no one was home. All was quiet, save for the snorts of the unicorns and the scraping of their hooves upon the ground. Pit shrugged after a moment, hoping nothing ill would befall the Chariot if he simply left it where it was.

Turning, Pit started the journey towards the Temple itself.

---

"Hello?" Pit called as he entered the large circular space that had briefly served as an arena for his battle with Phosphora, serving afterwards as something a little less...conventional. The memory of it returned eagerly to the forefront of his mind, along with the bitter frustration he'd felt when they were prematurely interrupted. He had wondered if he would ever be able to meet her again, but he knew of no way he could contact her. In fact, surely his mere desire to do so would have aroused Palutena's suspicions, though it seemed she already had them the moment she had read the note. He hoped she had only thought this to be an innocent meeting of two servants of sorts.

"Hello?" Pit called again, turning as he walked to take in the room and perhaps catch Phosphora attempting to sneak up on him, "is anyone there?"

His voice echoed off the high, curved walls and ceiling, answering his call with his own words. Pit looked down, certain that there had to be someone besides him here and wondering how elaborate of an appearance they planned to make.

"Hello?" Pit shouted, "Phosphora, are you there?"

"No, Pit, she isn't", came a reply at last, and it most definitely did not come from Phosphora. Pit turned quickly on his feet, spinning in a full circle eventually to find that he alone still dwelt in the room. The origin of the voice was unknown to him, though he recognised it after initial surprise made way for recognition.

"Viridi...?" he said uncertainly.

It was as though her name evoked a spell within the room, for barely had it escaped his lips did Nature suddenly invade the space around him. Pit jumped, startled as tiles were suddenly pulled apart, thick vines slithering up from the dark unknown and winding their way across the ground. Vines met and intertwined, swiftly forming around Pit an unmistakeable vista of nature as leaves began to sprout from the vines. He looked down as he felt blades of grass tickling the sides of his feet, having absolutely no idea how grass had come to be in such a place, though after a moment, he began to fill the softness of earth beneath his sandals. Behind him, a maturing tree cast its shadow over him, branches hanging heavy with ripe, vibrant fruit that actually grew before his astonished eyes. He yelped a moment later, however, when an apple dropped right onto his head.

"Ow", Pit muttered as he turned his eyes up towards the offending branch. Looking around himself, he saw that a indescribably beautiful garden had literally grown right in the middle of the Thunder Cloud Temple. His astonishment left him speechless and slack-jawed.

"Pit, we meet at last", came the voice of Viridi, and this time he was able to pinpoint it, turning just as she emerged from behind the tree. It was a very strange moment when she did appear, firstly because Pit had never seen her outside of her astral form, which to say it loomed over him was an understatement. Secondly, he immediately noticed that she was exactly his height. He had lived a life in which he had become accustomed to looking up to people, both figuratively and literally. In the flesh, so to speak, Phosphora had been at least a head taller than him, and Palutena was a little taller still. But now, finding himself able to meet Viridi at his own eye level, he felt a little more comfortable.

Her dress was partitioned into three different colours: purple, red and burgundy, and each section was patterned with woven vines, a vibrant flower sitting at her chest with a bed of leaves ringing it. It was difficult to tell whether she wore long, fingerless gloves that extended beyond her elbows, or her arms were painted with intricate patterns. Her light blonde hair was long, reaching almost to the back of her knees even though it was tied up at the side of her head in a ponytail of sorts. Yet another flower was attached to the thick twist of vine that bound her hair, though several small thorn branches ringed it, sitting atop a bed of leaves. Her young face was brightened by large, brown eyes and a small, cute nose, but her lips were held ramrod straight as she glared at Pit.

"Uh, hello again", Pit said, his coming out a little more high pitched than usual, "you're not Phosphora..."

"Your intelligence knows no bounds", she told him callously.

"Sooo, um, is she here?" Pit asked, looking around hopefully.

"She is...tied up, at the moment", Viridi said, the corner of her lips twitching.

"You mean she's busy, right?"

"Pit", Viridi said, leaning back against the trunk of the tree with her arms folded, "do you realise how long I've been waiting?"

"Um, but I came on the Lightning Chariot..." Pit trailed off as he pointed in the general direction of where he assumed the main entrance to be. Viridi merely glared at him, lifting her foot a moment later and kicking into the tree. Keeping her eyes fixed on him, she held her hand out and caught the apple that fell, taking a large, hungry bite from it. Clear juice trickled from the corner of her lip as she chewed rather angrily.

"You - er, you're drib - "

"I've been watching and waiting patiently, Pit", Viridi cut across him, her voice muffled as she took another bite of the apple, "but you seemed to forget about little old Viridi, huh?"

"I...I don't think I know what you're talking - " Pit stumbled over his words, trying to indicate that the Goddess had a trail of apple juice slithering towards her neck.

"Don't play dumb with me, Pit!" Viridi suddenly shouting and accompanying said shout by flinging the apple core at him, "you thought you would just get jiggy with all the ladies and forget about me?"

"Get...jiggy?"

"Shut up!"

Pit flinched, actually holding his hands up before him as though to shield himself. Viridi stood slightly hunched over, her arms taut at her sides while her hands curled into trembling fists. Her eyes were wide with outrage and her nostrils flared as she breathed rather heavily. Pit was reminded of a human child throwing a temper tantrum.

"Well", he began, "you do seem, um, rather...young".

"What?"

"I don't want to get into trouble", Pit said quickly.

"What trouble?"

"I really don't think this would be legal", Pit said, shaking his head.

"Do you even know what you look like?"

"Why", Pit said, stretching his arms before him and curling the left a little, "rather manly and handsome - "

"You look like a boy who's barely hit puberty", Viridi mercilessly shot him down, "and I'm more than ten times your age!" she added furiously.

"Well, you know", Pit said, shrugging, "books and covers".

"So, loverboy, what made Phosphora any different?" Viridi demanded, stalking over to stand in front of him and folding her arms. He shrunk away as she glared daggers into him.

"Umm, she looks...legal...barely?" Pit tentatively uttered the last word, lifting his hands as makeshift shields. Steam practically shot from Viridi's ears as a roaring fire leapt up into her eyes. Her arm shot straight through Pit's feeble defence, her hand wrapping itself tightly in the fabric of his chiton and pulling him towards her with a yelp.

"Pit, I could do things to you that would have you clutching the 'sacred stones', limping back to Palutena in tears and begging for a lawyer", Viridi threatened. She lifted her other hand and his eyes turned to it as thick, bulging vines crept up into the air behind her, "I would be quite happy to sit here and watch my vines treat you in a rather illegal manner".

"I don't think I'd like that", Pit whispered, shaking his head as the vines loomed over him.

"I didn't think so", Viridi almost growled. "Do you remember when you destroyed my Reset Bomb factory, Pit, and I was like 'oh, drat. That was my only Reset Bomb factory!'?"

"Um, yeah. Actually, that was a pretty fun mission - mnph!"

Viridi clamped her hand over his mouth and forcibly turned his face to one side. Where it had emerged from, he had no idea, but there sitting on a thick bed of flowers and leaves sat the weapon Viridi had wiped out an entire battlefield with, pulsing gently in a façade of harmless innocence. She gave him a moment to take in the truth of it before turning his face back to her.

"You wouldn't", Pit said the moment Viridi removed her hand from his mouth, "you couldn't!"

The Goddess raised a thin eyebrow. "Care to try me, Pit? Do you want you bet thousands and millions of lives on that gamble? I assume you haven't forgotten that Idespise humans?"

"Ah".

Viridi merely smirked at him, watching the battle ongoing behind his eyes.

"I...but - !"

"You are going to ravish me, Pit", she told him plainly, "and you are going to like it".

She drew him forward into a kiss before he realised what was happening. Their mouths bumped together clumsily, teeth clashing when they opened their lips as Viridi kissed him with annoyance and anger at the reigns of her body and Pit gave way without even a hint of resistance, fearful. He pulled away after a few uncomfortable moments.

"Wait - wait!" Pit shouted, holding up his hands as Viridi's eyes burst into flame and the vines at her back towered over him menacingly.

"If we're going to do this", he said, slowly lifting a hand to her wrist, "let's at least do it properly, okay?"

She eyed him suspiciously even as she allowed him to gently prise her closed fist at his neck open. Her eyes cooled gradually, the vines sinking down until they were out of sight behind her. Pit took her hand in his as she finally released his chiton, without pause lifting his other to her cheek as he returned his lips to hers.

Her mouth was warm and sweet - oh so sweet, her tongue alive with the rich flavour of the apple she had eaten. A hunger was woken within Pit as they kissed long and slow, and he refused to break the kiss, suddenly addicted her taste. She broke it in the end - even Goddesses needed to breathe - and this time, when she looked at him, the fire in her eyes was one born of desire and her gaze was heavy upon him. Her lips parted and she leaned forward. Pit met her eagerly, his tongue quivering with anticipation as they joined lips. The hand at her cheek slid around to the back of her head, and he caught long and silky locks between his fingers as he went. Their joined hands squeezed one another as their kiss deepened, both of them tilting their heads as tongues probed and pushed into each other's mouths.

Viridi resurfaced, drawing air into her lungs as she lifted a hand and curled her fingers tightly in Pit's hair, tilting her head back as his lips and tongue followed the path of juice that had stained her chin.

"Pit", she sighed his name as she rocked on her heels, leaning back precariously. The vines sprang up to support her as she pulled Pit to the ground, lowering them gently onto a bed of grass overshadowed by the heavy, burdened arms of the tree behind them. Pit stood over her on his hands and knees, hungry. Viridi thumped a fist to the ground, the next moment turning up her palm to catch yet another apple as it fell. Gazing up at it Pit with hooded eyes and curved lips, she took a small bite from the sweet fruit.

They kissed, and he groaned as the rich taste of her graced his tongue. His hands moved seemingly of their own accord, lifting the hem of Viridi's dress and pushing it up to her waist before drawing himself out into the open air. She spread her legs for him, her knees pointed up towards the tree behind her. Pit paused as he looked down and took in the beautiful pink of her moist centre, crowned by a mound of hair whose colour matched the curtains, but as he moved, Viridi lowered a hand to cover herself.

"Nuh uh", she told him, shaking a finger at him, "not there. I'm a celestial maiden, and I'd like to remain so".

Pit wrinkled his brow, puzzled. "Then where?"

Viridi pointed with the same hand she prohibited him entrance with. Pit looked blankly in the direction she indicated for a full second.

"Nuh uh", he echoed her, shaking his head, "that's where - "

"Pit", Viridi interrupted him, rolling her eyes, "if I lay before any man in this provocative manner and offered him my anus, he would - "

" - be promptly arrested", Pit muttered.

" - probably explode", Viridi said, "and then die from shock. You haven't exploded yet. I'm impressed. Now, hold still", she told him.

"I don't think I like where this is going", Pit said as Viridi pressed her palm to the ground for a long moment, lifting it slowly and seemingly nurturing the growth of a strange flower as she did so. It nuzzles its head against her skin like a pet, and she smiled warmly. As she lifted her hand away, the pale blue flower bloomed, its smoothly rounded petals opening gradually to reveal a long, thick greyish style with a rounded stigma.

"What is that?" Pit asked warily as Viridi milked the flower, pinching her thumb and forefinger at the base of the style and drawing her hand up to just below the stigma several times, a clear, runny liquid pooling into her palm. She glanced at him.

"You know, I think it's better you remain ignorant", she told him, patting the flower as she apparently finished milking it, "just trust me. Come here".

She leaned forward and grabbed hold of him before he could protest. It didn't matter though, for the next second he had absolutely no desire to protest anyway. The liquid was cool and incredibly slick as Viridi applied it generously to him, laughing out loud as she looked up at him with a heavy gaze and her lip caught seductively in her teeth, stroking slowly from base to tip and drawing a gasp from his throat as he grabbed her wrist in surprise at the intensity of the sensation.

"Well, loverboy, time to taste the forbidden fruit", Viridi said after applying the liquid to herself with two fingers, "carefully, now", she warned him with a sudden and brief glare. Pit swallowed, tentatively taking a hold of himself and, guided by Viridi, pushed his tip against the taut muscle of her lower entrance.

Her lips parted and a sigh escaped them as his head slid into her. He could feel her tightening around him and winced at the brief but powerful clench of her muscles.

"Oooh", she moaned softly, a slight flush rising to her cheeks, "it's been a while. Just a moment, Pit..."

Her muscles relaxed and he pushed himself further in when she spoke to him. Comprehension regarding the purpose of the slick liquid dawned on him when he had slipped in to the hilt and a deep groan was drawn from their throats.

"Mmmm", Viridi moaned appreciatively, tossing her head back and closing her eyes, "feels good?"

"So...tight...hnngh!"

Viridi chuckled softly, lowering a hand to her centre once more and slipping a finger between her lower lips. She fixed him with the sexiest, lustiest look he had ever seen and he had never known he had possessed such willpower until that moment. His body thrummed powerfully and he fought through a heady rush of blood to hold himself back. She smiled, watching him.

"You saved the best till last, Pit. Now, ravish me".

The rest was a blur, a rush of colour and sound and scent and taste that he barely comprehended. All he knew was that an immense pressure was building within him and he felt like he was literally going to burst. He was faintly aware of his hands gripping flesh hard beneath them as his hips moved at a pace he didn't know they were capable of. He heard his name shouted by sweet lips that he crushed into his own. And then it came. A peak like no other, so much so that it blasted reality utterly to pieces. His shout mingled with her scream, and the world faded to white before his eyes.

Fin.

...

...

...

"Phew", Pit said, blowing out air, "man, that was exhausting! I'm glad it's all over...Wait. Why am I still talking? And why is everything dark?"

"It's not over yet, little Pit", came the distinctive tones of the former Queen of the Underworld, floating through the darkness. Pit's head snapped to the side as Medusa melted into reality, pushing aside the darkness and seeming to bend it to her will as she stepped forward. Pit flinched - or at least tried to. His arms and legs wouldn't move, and as Medusa loomed over him, he realised that he was lying flat, chained to some manner of surface.

"What's happening?" Pit demanded in a panicked voice.

"Shh, Pit", came the familiar voice of the Goddess of Light, "there's still one more scene".

She appeared at Medusa's side, and Pit's eyes immediately brightened at her presence and his lips were already forming her name. But then he noticed that she was standing beside her arch enemy and giving absolutely no sign that she was doing so. There was no revulsion on her face, or the gleam of the promise of justice in her eye. Pit's own eyes then widened painfully in shock when the Goddesses turned to each other, lifting hands to each other's cheek before drawing the other to their lips.

He felt a hand at the side of his head, and hissed in pain as it pulled his face towards the other side of his body. When he looked, however, there was no one there, not until another form melted into reality. Pandora. She occupied a chair, though she sat rather unconventionally, her right leg sitting on the chair's raised arm as she trailed her hands along the curvature of her body. Her lips formed an 'O' as she reached between her thighs, winking at him before she touched herself and her chest rose sharply as she drew in breath.

"Pit..."

Phosphora's voice floated towards him and he turned his head, looking directly down between his own feet. Pit's loins tightened further still as he watched Viridi's head bob up and down between her commander's toned legs, Phosphora threw her head back and her lips parted to release a long, full moan as she kneaded her breasts.

"What...what on earth is going on?"

Suddenly, a laugh he never thought he would hear ever again joined with the moans and sighs of the women around him. Pit strained his eyes as he looked up. The God of the Underworld stood at his head, leering down at him.

"Oh, Pitty, isn't this delightful?"

"Hades", Pit said with gritted teeth.

"Charmed to meet you yet again", Hades said, waving his hand in exuberant fashion as he gave a small, mocking bow. Pit then noticed the book and ink-tipped quill held in his hands.

"Is this your doing?" he demanded of Hades, pulling at his bonds and filling the dark space with the clinking of chains. He called to his Goddess, but to no avail.

"The quill is mightier than the blade, Pitty", Hades said as he moved away, approaching the self-pleasuring form of Pandora, "but the quill is merely a slave to the imagination", he finished, flashing Pit a brilliant white smile as he scrawled onto the pages of the book. Pandora seemed to react, her body writhing beneath her own administrations and filling the air with a shout.

"What are you doing, Hades?" Pit yelled as the God glided over to Phosphora and Viridi, gazing down at them with a wide grin. They seemed to take no notice of him, or of Pit when he called desperately to them.

"I am crafting art", Hades said, scrawling once more into the book and finishing with a flourish as he swept the quill from the page into the air. Viridi suddenly adjusted herself, lifting a hand from Phosphora's thighs and seeming to push it between them to join the work of her tongue. Phosphora groaned, lifting her legs and locking them around the Goddess' head, begging Viridi to drive her over the edge.

"Wait", Pit said, blushing at Phosphora's choice of words as she punctuated her moans of pleasure, "are you...controlling them?"

"Controlling them?" Hades said as he practically danced over to Medusa and Palutena, resting his chin on the shoulder of the former and hissing back at the snakes atop her scalp, "perhaps", Hades allowed, "I am merely giving the people what they want to see, Pitty".

Medusa's hand slid down towards Palutena's chest, drawing a sigh from the Goddess as she squeezed. Their kiss deepened as Palutena's hand travelled further south, finding a split in Medusa's garb and slipping through. Medusa moaned appreciatively a few moments later, drawing away from their kiss and favouring Palutena with a heated gaze and lopsided smile.

"Oh, aren't we eager...?"

Pit found it very, very difficult to look away.

"Giving the people what they...want..." Pit echoed Hades before trailing off, "wait...Just wait one moment".

"Yes, Pitty?" Hades said, returning to stand by his head.

"You...did you make...everything else happen, too?"

"Everything else...happen?"

"Have you been writing this whole thing? You made me...and them...do...things with each other?"

"Things?" Hades repeated, "come now, Pit, we're all adults here", he said before leaning down and leering at him, "oh wait".

"Stop this, right now!" Pit shouted as the women around him began to reach their own crescendo and his loins tightened painfully, trying and failing to keep his eyes from wondering.

"Oh, but there's one more surprise", Hades said, already scrawling in the book, "I just couldn't let this little story finish without acknowledging the swooning fangirls out there. And fanboys, probably".

"Wha - ?"

"Hello, Pit", said a rather familiar voice from a rather uncomfortably close proximity. Pit turned his head once more and saw Pittoo standing beside him. His dark twin sparkled, literally. His eyes and hair and chiton and skin dazzled Pit, and his wings fluttered gently at his back.

"Pittoo?"

"We'll always be one, you and I", Pittoo said, smiling warmly at him.

"Umm, Pittoo?"

"I can't wait to hear you call my name, Pit, all night long..."

Pit yelped and tried to pull himself away as Pittoo closed his eyes and began to lean in towards him.

"Hades!" Pit shouted up at him.

"Ha ha, there's no use in resisting it, Pitty!" Hades returned, scrawling furiously onto the pages of the book as he favoured Pit with a gleaming grin, Pittoo drawing in ever closer.

"Why couldn't I be a normal angeeeeeeel!" Pit cried out into the darkness.

Fin.