Their Finest Hour

"Ah, Shepard." Shepard turned as she heard Mordin's voice call to her from the mess. The Salarian doctor had a cup of warm tea in one hand and a data pad in the other while his omni-tool was illuminated at the same time. "Taking break from Vrolik's cure, wish to speak to you." His eyes glanced in the direction that Shepard had been walking in before he had called her and Shepard swore that his eyes twinkled at her. "When finished in Forward Battery, of course."

That smarmy little... "Sure, Mordin. I'll be right down." Shepard watched as Mordin smiled before quickly walking back to the elevator, wondering how in the world he could operate both a data pad and omni-tool with out spilling a drop of his tea. Shepard shook her head and continued to the Forward Battery. She didn't care that Gardener and several other crew members had heard the little exchange, she and Garrus' relationship was old hat. They were all more consumed with gossip about how Scale Itch had gotten on the Normandy and were currently taking bets as to who had carried it aboard; Grunt, Kelly or Tali. Shepard's money was on Kelly. If it was Kelly, then Zaeed would be having one hell of an awful time right now.

Shepard chuckled to herself as she waited for the doors to the Forward Battery to open, Garrus looking at her with mild curiosity. Shepard shook her head and leaned on the rail to Garrus' right, watching as the Turian finished with his calibrations. "Do you like staring at my ass, Commander Shepard?" Garrus fluttered his mandibles when Shepard's eyes slowly raked down his body then back up, quirking her brow at him. "I didn't think you came all the way down here just to enjoy the view, Commander." He gave her a broad grin. "Though I wouldn't blame you for falling for the most handsome man on this ship."

"Cocky Bastard," Shepard laughed. "I was actually going to ask you if the repairs to the main gun met with your approval."

"Oh, Shepard? Which one; The gun that EDI fires or the one you like setting off every chance you get?"

Shepard lifted her eyebrow again. "I wasn't aware that my favorite gun had to be taken in for repairs." She sauntered forward and forcefully turned Garrus so that he was facing the doors, his claws holding onto the console. "I need to inspect the workmanship for myself."

Garrus' mandibles flew as wide as his eyes as he watched Shepard slowly kneel in front of him. "Sh - Shepard?" She had her fingers at his waist, undoing the releases on his armor in record time before Garrus' mind finely caught up enough to lock the doors from his console. He couldn't take his eyes off of his Commander. "Spirits, Shepard!"

---

"You wanted to talk, Mordin?"

"Ah! Yes, Shepard. Been working on treatment for Thane. Struck by sudden idea from conversation with Miranda." The Salarian bustled about his lab as he sat out the equipment he would need. "But, first, an Analgesic." Shepard took the offered pill with a puzzled look on her face. "Skin around mouth becoming swollen. Would not recommend repeating fallacio without proper protection."

Shepard smirked and took the pill along with the offered glass of water, watching as Mordin set his equipment up. For a person who had no interest in sex he sure did know an awful lot about it. She made a face as the pill went down but she did start to feel a little less pinched in the mouth as it took effect. "Ok, what do you need me for, Mordin?"

"Hoping to develop treatment for Keprals. Was speaking to Miranda, mentioned nano-machines used in reconstruction and healing. Would like a sample."

Shepard smirked, shaking her head as she held out her arm. "How much blood you need, doc?"

"Not blood," Mordin picked up something that looked like a long syringe with a larger gauge needle. "Will need lung tissue sample." Mordin backed up a step, his eyes suddenly concerned. "Never seen human turn green. Adverse reaction to Analgesic? No, no; would have had reaction sooner. Intestinal ailment? No, showed no signs before." Mordin narrowed his eyes. "Trypanophobia? Afraid of needles, Shepard," he asked, incredulity edging into his voice.

"Where are you going to stick that thing?"

Mordin put the syringe back down on the tray and removed his hand from any where near it until Shepard stopped staring at it. "Not to worry, Shepard. Needle will be inserted between third and fourth rib, small sample taken before application of medi-gel. Will deaden area with local anesthetic if pain a problem."

Shepard gulped and reminded herself that she was doing this for a good friend. "Ok. Just be quick." She unbuttoned her shirt. "Before I change my mind."

Mordin nodded and motioned for Shepard to sit on a chair with her back toward him. "There, now lean forward." He spread a skin numbing liquid over the area he had chosen. "Exhale, slowly." He waited until she was relaxed before he pushed the needle into her skin. At first she felt nothing but as it penetrated the muscle wall of her ribs, she flinched, inhaling quickly. "I apologize for any discomfort, Shepard." Mordin continued to push the needle into her back until he met light resistance. Slowly he pulled the plunger and a tube of soft, pink tissue slid into the reservoir of the syringe.

He quickly extracted the needle and smoothed a small dollop of medi-gel onto the site, noting with some interest that the incision was already sealing itself shut. No doubt the tissue he had extracted would be replaced as well within the day. "There, all done."

Shepard sighed, straightening her back as she slid her shirt back on. "Is that what it looks like?" She looked at the tissue sample closely, a combination of curiosity and disgust on her face. "You think you can get anything useful from that?"

Mordin was already separating the sample into different vials for different tests. "Of course, Shepard. Samples should do nicely. Will let you know if I need more."

Shepard opened her mouth to protest but she decided to let the matter go. "Right. I'll let you get back to work." She waved, letting the door close behind her.

"Shepard," Kelly turned toward the lab as the doors opened. "You have a new message at your private terminal."

Shepard nodded and made her way over to the terminal on the left side of the galaxy map. The first message was short and simple; "You had better be worth the trouble." Shepard hated cryptic messages. Especially cryptic messages from Aria. What ever it was that Aria had seen in the information had her on edge enough to not trust even encrypted comm-buoy channels.

The sender of the next message brought a smile to Shepard's face, though when she read it, she had to resist the urge to slam her head against the wall. This news would make all their lives much harder. And they just left Illium, too.

"Kelly," Shepard turned to her secretary, forgetting all about wagers and STD's. "Get everyone in the mess in ten minutes, Joker included. I think the first piece of shit just hit the fan."

"Of course, Commander." Kelly watched as Shepard got into the elevator, worry wrinkling the skin between her brows.

---

Shepard waited in the mess, leaning on Gardeners table, staring down at the floor as every member of the crew piled in, each taking a seat. Kelly came in last trailed by Joker as he hobbled over to an open seat next to Dr. Chakwas and Grunt. The crew looked rested and refreshed after their month of shore leave and Shepard felt a twinge of guilt at the information she was about to give them.

"Sup, Commander," Joker piped up as Shepard got lost in her thoughts again. "You look like someone pissed in your coffee."

Chakwas spluttered, wipping coffee from her chin with the back of her hand. "Needlessly graphic, yet oddly appropriate," Thane mused, leaning against the bulkhead.

"Urinating in coffee," Mordin stroked his chin. "Meant as disrespect? Would be deadly if Hanar urine used."

"Shit," Joker pulled his cap off of his head and hid his face with it. "I'm gonna shut up now."

"Please, do," Tali shook her head, looking over her shoulder with annoyance as Grunt laughed at Joker's embarrassment.

"You walked right into that one, Joker," Shepard laughed, shaking her head. "But, I called you all here for a different reason." The banter died down as all of their attention was focused on their Commander. "As you have probably figured out by now, we pissed off The Illusive Man."

"He deserved it, Shepard," Donnelly piped up. "He's lucky Miranda didn't hack his location and send Grunt to stick his dick in his eye."

"You're such a poet," Gabby covered her eyes. "Geez, now I can't get that image out of my head."

Grunt sneered. "You Humans are weird."

"So says the man with four testicles," Donnelly shot back.

Grunt actually laughed. "Yea, and all of 'em's got a female chasing after it."

"Great," Garrus put his hand over his eyes. "Now I'll be trying to scrub that image out of my head for the next week."

"Heh! Your welcome, Vakarian."

"Don't mention it. Ever." Garrus turned to Shepard. "When are we going to release him on Tuchanka? We keep him around here and he's likely going to start humping the first thing that can't get away. Which will probably be the entire ship."

"Damn, I would almost pay to see that!" Joker leaned away from Grunt as the young Krogan narrowed his eyes dangerously. "If he does that, I designate Miranda as the ship's flotation device."

Shepard coughed as she tried to get her laughter under her control. Oh, how she loved them all right now. "Ok, ok. Miranda, no killing Joker yet. We might need him."

"You 'might' need me?"

"But to get back to why I called you all here." Shepard cleared her throat. "I just got a message from Councilor Anderson. It seems Cerberus has put out a bounty on the Normandy."

"What?" The entire mess exploded as nearly everyone shot up from their chairs.

"He's mad!" Miranda pounded her fist on the table. "He knows the Reapers are coming! He knows what we're all up against! What could he possibly gain by hindering our efforts?"

Shepard shrugged one shoulder. "The only thing I can come up with is either leverage or a PR stunt."

"Well," Joker scratched his head. "could be he wants the entire galaxy to pay attention to what we're doing? More eyes watching the skies and all."

Shepard crossed her arms and leaned back. "That's as good a reason as any, Joker. But I still don't trust him. What ever his reasons, he's going to make our lives difficult for the time being. The bounty isn't all that large for a ship this size, but he's accused me, Garrus, Grunt, Joker and Tali of stealing Cerberus intelligence, technology and property."

"So what's the Council going to do," Jacob asked, folding his arms over his chest as he leaned back and put his feet on the table. "They gonna send another Spectre after you?"

Shepard shook her head. "Not yet. Anderson assured me that right now, all they want to do is stay as far away from me politically as possible. From what he wrote me it almost seemed like they were proud." She chuckled. "But right now, it's a Cerberus affair. If the Alliance wants to get involved, they can," Shepard shrugged. "However, I need to make sure that you're all still in." The crew glanced at each other. "We're still close enough to Illium to dock and let anyone off who doesn't want any part of this."

"Are you trying to get rid of us, Shepard?" Gabby seemed absolutely flabbergasted.

Donnelly made his decision known by staying right in his chair, arms crossed over his chest. "You're going to have to shove us out the air lock, Shepard."

Garrus stepped up beside Shepard and put his arm around her waist, his forehead touching hers. "And you're going to need Wrex and Grunt both to pry me from your side."

"Na, life would be too boring without you throwing us into impossible situations." Joker grinned. "Were gonna follow you where ever you go, Shepard. We're kind of like a fart that way."

"Humans are weird," Grunt repeated, shaking his head. "But, yea, what the scrawny pilot said."

Shepard looked around at her crew, her eyes settling on Gardener. "Well... someone's got to feed all these hungry people. Can't expect you to cook for yourselves and not blow the whole damn ship up."

"Is this how you all feel?" Shepard smiled as she got a resounding "Yes!" from them all. She seemed to soften for a moment, her arm slipping around Garrus' waist as she settled her head on his shoulder. "Then I guess you had all better get back to your stations." She smiled. "Next stop; sunny Tuchanka."

"YES!" Grunt pumped his fist in the air as he headed for the elevator.

Joker snickered. "Save some of that for the females, Grunt. Lord knows we don't need it all over the walls."

Shepard laughed, truly laughed for the first time in two years.