A second chance

Chapter 4 (Yuan’s P.O.V)

The evening had been more eventful than I would have thought. After my encounter with Kratos, I got back to my apartment to write the report I had to give the chief in the morning. I made some simple food since I did not have the time to engage in anything complex, before sitting at my desk and typing my report. That had allowed me not to think about Kratos for a few hours. I didn’t even know why my thoughts were constantly drifting towards him. Was it because that man reminded me of my own pain at the death of my wife? It had to be… I stopped working when my headache came back with full force. I got up to find the painkillers only to find the bottle empty. I remembered taking the last ones earlier today. I left my apartment to go to the pharmacy to get a new bottle when I saw him standing still before the building. I hadn’t expected to see Kratos there so soon. But I was content of his presence. I knew he could keep the loneliness at bay, if only for a few hours. That’s why I insisted that he come inside despite his reticence.

And now we were sitting at my kitchen table, him crying silently in his hands and me respecting his privacy by looking elsewhere thoughtfully. I let my mind drift to all he told me. Kratos was a yakuza. I had to arrest him; it was my job, my duty. But I couldn’t do it… I didn’t want to. I understood full well that he wasn’t a criminal by choice, but by obligation. Because of that Yggdrasil. A shiver ran down my spine when I thought about that man. The head of the mightiest family of yakuza in all Japan. Even knowing this much, the police was unable to lay a hand on him. He was manipulating too much people, was having too many contacts to take the fall for him. All the officers that tried to arrest him died cruel and violent deaths… I realized that by promising Kratos to lend him my aid, I would have to oppose Yggdrasil, putting myself in the same mortal danger… I knew there was only one way I could take to arrest him and my chances of success would be near to null. But I had to do it. Kratos was counting on me and I would not let him down.

Leaving my thoughts, I looked at the clock and saw the late hour. The tiredness seemed to fall back on my shoulders and I remembered how much I needed to sleep. I stole a furtive glance at Kratos and saw he had stopped crying and was now looking back at me. For how long, I didn’t know. I wasn’t going to ask him what he was thinking about. I got up and couldn’t stop a yawn to pass my lips.
“It’s getting late now. I’m going to sleep. Oh, by the way, feel free to do as you please here. Seeing that it doesn’t include doing a loud racket at night, we should get along well.” I joked and saw a weak smile dawning on his lips.
His first real smile since I met him! I stood there speechless, my gaze fixed on that smile. It made him look so much younger… I surprised myself thinking he was rather handsome. I slapped myself mentally for even thinking that.
“Yuan?” I jumped when the worried voice of Kratos reached me.
I saw him get up slowly, confusion showing on his features. I realized I had been staring at him for a long moment now. I felt a blush creep its way to my cheeks with horror and I turned away from its cause before striding to my bedroom. I hurriedly took the clothes I would wear tomorrow from my wardrobe just as a pillow and a blanket. I got out of my room only to bump into Kratos who was staring at me with worried eyes.
“Are you okay, Yuan? You look…” He began to ask, trying to meet my gaze.
I laughed nervously and my reaction gave me the sudden urge to bash my head on the wall. I held back this suicidal urge and instead showed a face I hoped was neutral enough.
“Yeah, I’m fine. It’s just that I’m tired and I need to sleep.” I told him only half the truth. It was true I tended to act weird when I was lacking sleep. It certainly was not because of Kratos. Certainly not. I saw him frown.
“In that case, I’m the one who should take the couch. You would sleep better in your own bed.” Kratos proposed while looking closely at my face where dark rings were more than visible under my eyes.
I whispered and walked by him, heading towards the lounge. I turned around before going in.
“Don’t be a fool. You are my guest and it’s only natural that I offer you my bed. Anyway, I’m sure I wouldn’t sleep better in my bed.” I replied without bothering to explain my words.
He frowned again and I saw him open his mouth to speak but I interrupted him.
“I will not change my mind. Goodnight, Kratos.” I whispered in a tired voice. He gazed at me for a few seconds before wishing me goodnight and entering my bedroom. He didn’t close the door, though. I supposed he needed to know I wasn’t far from him. I pushed that thought aside and entered the lounge. I put my clothes on the floor and undressed myself until I wore nothing but my underwear. I always slept that way and I didn’t have the intention to change my habit because Kratos would live with me. I untied my hair and they fell freely on my back. I arranged my pillow and lied on the couch, covering myself with the blanket. I closed my eyes and waited to fall asleep. But I knew full well that sleep wasn’t coming before a long time. Since Martel’s death, my wife, I suffered insomnia. I was having difficulty sleeping without the heat of another human being besides me. Even now, after all these years, I often awoke panicked while seeing I was alone. But the prospect that I wasn’t alone in my apartment tonight calmed me and I relaxed slightly. I pushed away my thoughts and tried to find a much desired sleep.

The alarm of my watch stirred me awake, telling me it was already time to get up. I groaned and opened my eyes and the sight of my lounge made me remember the events of yesterday. I sat up quickly and saw with surprise that a second blanket had been thrown on my shoulders. Kratos must have given it to me. I got up and covered myself with one of the blankets. I walked to my bedroom and threw a glance inside. Disappointment filled me when I saw the room was empty. The bed sheets were ruffled, making me believe Kratos had slept, or at least tried to. I could only imagine the nightmares he must had experienced. I turned away and entered the kitchen only to saw it empty. I sadly realized that Kratos was gone. I then noticed a small note on the counter. I took it and read what was written on it.

Yuan, I’m sorry to have left without telling you, but you were sleeping soundly and I didn’t want to wake you. I’ve returned to work. I can’t let Yggdrasil know of what I’m plotting, so I must do like there’s nothing wrong. I will come back tonight while being careful I’m not followed.
P.S: I woke up in the night and saw that you were shivering so I got you another blanket. I also prepared a breakfast for you. It’s in the fridge.

Kratos

I read several times the note written by Kratos. I felt an inexplicable happiness knowing that he had the intention of coming back again. But why was I acting like that!? I barely knew him… Has the loneliness made me so dependent that I was willing to become attached to anyone? No, I was sure it wasn’t that. Kratos wasn’t giving me the impression that he was a stranger. I had a facility to talk to him that I didn’t have with the people closest to me. I looked at the time and cursed myself. I had only twenty minutes left before having to go to the police station. I had lost too much time. I took a quick shower and put on my uniform. I wrapped up and printed the report I had to give to Bryant. I opened the fridge and saw the breakfast Kratos made for me. A plate of sashimi with salmon, wrapped up in a box ready to take away. Incredible. It was like Kratos knew I wouldn’t have the time to eat before going to work! By all means, I was more than happy to not having to prepare a breakfast for once. I took it with me and a realization hit me just before I left my home. Kratos didn’t have a key. If I came back later than him today, he wouldn’t be able to come in… I took the doubles of the key with me. Maybe I could meet him before the end of the day… if my plan would work. I left my apartment and took off towards the police station.

“You did WHAT!?” Bryant screamed at me, his cheeks red with anger.
I hadn’t seen him in that state in a long time. I shrank unconsciously in my chair under his furious gaze.
“You heard me well; I told him he could stay at my place. He’s got no home now! I defended my actions while knowing I had violated the established rules.
“I know that, but it wasn’t your place to do so!! Your task is to interrogate him on what happened there!” Bryant fumed while casting me a murderous glance.
“But I did. I mean, he confided in me. He told me of his doubts on a potential criminal, or rather on the one who hired the responsible. » I replied immediately, trying to quell his anger if only a little.
Bryant leaned over the desk and joined his hands. A nasty gleam was still shining in his eyes. I was sure he had gotten out of bed on the wrong side. He was rarely in a foul mood like that…
“Enlighten me.”
“According to him, it’s Mithos Yggdrasil.” I conceded and waited for Bryant’s reaction.
It didn’t take time to come. He looked at me with surprise and I swore I saw him turn paler. My fingers began to drum on my thighs out of nervousness under the strange gaze of my boss.
“… It must be a joke!? Why would a yakuza such as him waste time on killing a miserable family?” He muttered for himself since I almost didn’t hear him. I saw him got out a cigarette and didn’t think of protesting this time. It really was not the time. Rather I thought about his question and sought an answer. Kratos hadn’t told me the reason, but I could easily guess it.
“I suppose he did it to teach him a lesson. Kratos is his highest subordinate. He must have disobeyed him and he punished him by killing his family.” I surprised myself with the neutrality of my voice while saying such a horrible thing, but that seemed so true…
“So you mean to tell me you took in a criminal!?” Bryant hissed between his teeth, never leaving my gaze.
Shit. I had forgotten this little detail… I had to defend Kratos! I promised him I would protect him, not that I would sell him to the police. I looked Bryant in the face.
“Listen to me, please. Kratos never intended to serve him. True, he committed crimes, but never on his own free will. Is it just to condemn him for that!?” I tried to get him to understand my point of view.
I grimaced when I saw his eyes darken and his hand mashing violently his cigarette in the ashtray. Great. He was really irritated.
“So if I follow your logic, half of Japan’s criminals could go freely under the pretext someone had forced their hand. How many times must I tell you to not let your personal feelings hinder your judgment!?” Bryant fumed and furiously took his head between his hands.
I felt bad to put him in such a state. I knew he was right, but I had gotten the habit to do as I thought best. In that case, helping Kratos to break free of his situation. But that didn’t excuse the situation in which I was putting the man sitting in front of me. That man who did so much for me these last years. I dropped my gaze shamefully.
“I’m… I’m sorry, but I can’t help it.” I apologized without being able to look him in the eye.
“I know. I’ve known you for a long time. And you trust his words?” Bryant asked me seriously, regaining some composure. I lifted my gaze and looked at him, determined.
“Yes. My intuition tells me he’s telling the truth and it never failed me.” I told him firmly.
I hadn’t doubt Kratos even one second when he told me about Yggdrasil. A voice inside of my head had told me to trust him and that’s what I did. That voice had never let me down in the past. Bryant folded his arms and closed his eyes for a short time. When he opened them, not an ounce of hesitation was left in them.
“And you know I trust you. Okay. You can offer him your protection, but only for the time the investigation will last. He will still have to answer his crimes afterwards.”
I received his words like a punch in the face. It wasn’t what I promised! I told Kratos he would not go to jail! At this rate, I would have to go back on my words and it was out of the question. I got up halfway and frowned deeply.
“But…” I began to protest against this decision, but Bryant interrupted me.
“Do not push me, Yuan.” He warned me in a low voice and I dared not to push the subject further. For the time being, anyway.
“Pardon me, commissioner.” I muttered halfheartedly.
Bryant didn’t pay it mind. He placed a hand under his chin and looked pensively at the ashtray.
“Mithos Yggdrasil, huh… It will be a problem. A big problem. We were unable to put our hands on him for years now. He always put the blame on his men and all his crimes were left unpunished. To take him head on would be suicide, I hope you know it?”
“Yes. That’s why I thought of another way, but I need your approbation.” I prepared myself to expose the idea that had bloomed in my head since my conversation with Kratos yesterday.
“I think I know what you got in mind.” Bryant told me to continue, his face dead serious.
I decided to get on with it and I hoped he would accept my suggestion.
“I must infiltrate his organization. It’s the only way I could think of to gather enough evidence to lock him up.” I revealed my strategy while never leaving his gaze. Bryant didn’t seem surprised, but his features darkened slightly.
“I feared we would get down to this. But I will not stop you. After all, I’m the one who put you on this investigation. I hope you know in what dangers that will put you, at least?”
Deep inside, I feared what would await me when I would be working undercover, but I was keeping that fear far away. It would only be a nuisance. I nodded my head with conviction.
“Yes. I’m well aware of it and it will not stop me.”
“I know. You’re too stubborn for your own good! And how are you planning to infiltrate Yggdrasil’s organization? You will need a serious cover…”
I had already thought about it and the name of one of my dear friends had come to my mind.
“I will ask for Botta’s help. His false identity as the leader of an important family of yakuza will surely be of some help. I heard he often deals with Yggdrasil and that he has obtained his trust.”
Bryant rubbed at his temples and closed the folder containing the report I had given him.
“It’s probably the best option. Contact him as soon as you can. I want you to give me a regular report on this investigation.” He ordered me in a tone that wouldn’t accept to be upset.
“I got it. I thank you to trust me with this, commissioner.” I got up and bowed respectfully before my superior. I was relieved to see he was letting me do as I please.
“Don’t think too much of it. You never gave me a reason not to trust you, Yuan. I only ask of you to be careful.” I felt the worry in his voice. I answered back with a half confident smile.
“I will do my best.”

I left the station several hours later, after dealing with some important paperwork. I was more than happy having obtained my boss’ permission for the investigation. The only thing left was to persuade Botta! Once outside, I took my cell phone and dialed my old friend’s number, hoping he would answer. At the third ringing, he picked up the phone.
“Hello, here’s Anji Yabuki. I’m listening.” I recognized my friend’s voice despite his false name.
He seemed preoccupied. He was probably not alone. I decided not to reveal my name in case someone was listening to the conversation.
“My old friend! How are you doing?” I talked in a cheerful voice and hoped Botta would recognize me even thought we hadn’t seen each other in a few weeks.
I knew it had worked when Botta was silent for a long moment. I heard at the other side some clothes being ruffled and the voice of my friend speaking to someone else.
“If you’ll excuse me.”
A long time passed by without him talking and the sound of a door being closed got to me. I leaned back nonchalantly against my car, waiting for him to speak.
“Yuan!? Why are you suddenly calling me?” Botta asked me in a hurried and irritated voice.
“Are you free at noon? I need to talk to you. In private.” I got to the point.
I would have the time to tell him the reason for my call when in private. There was too much risk to be overheard here. Botta took some time before answering me.
“It’s that urgent?” He insisted in a worried tone this time.
“Yes.” I replied simply. It was pure truth. I heard him sigh.
“Okay, I got it. Wait for me at the Gionzushi restaurant at 12h30. I’ll meet you there.”
“Perfect, but come alone.” I warned him and he sighed again. I felt bad for disrupting him so. He seemed to be on edge.
“If you insist…” He hung up and I did the same. I looked at my watch and saw I had one hour left before having to meet him at the restaurant. I knew what I had to do before going there. It was time for a little shopping.

I sat in a quiet corner of the restaurant, waiting for my friend to show up. I felt uncomfortable in my new clothes, but I had to get accustomed to them. If all was going well, after today, I would have to live under a second identity. I couldn’t afford to wear my police uniform. So I had gone to buy a new wardrobe. I was wearing a pair of black low waist pants with a spiked belt, a designer black shirt and a long beige coat. I had fastened my long hair in a braid and I was wearing a pair of sunglasses. I really wasn’t feeling like myself at the moment. I saw Botta enter the restaurant. I took off my glasses and I motioned him to join me. He was wearing a simple black suit. Really high-class for the head of a family of yakuza… I saw surprise on his face when he took notice of me. He rejoigned me, but didn’t sit down, too occupied by looking over me.
“Anji! I’m glad you were able to come.” I used his false name, in case someone was listening to us. I smiled at him and motioned to the chair in front of me.
“Care to explain why you’re dressed like that?” Botta asked me while sitting down and folded his arms, his gaze burning a hole in my head.
“You don’t like it? I got tired of my old style.” I joked while smiling at my friend and he soon smiled back at me.
“Glad to see you too.” He answered me and relaxed slightly in his chair.
The waitress came to take our orders and I waited until she was far from us before I leaned over the table.
“You think there’s a chance you got followed?” I whispered while casting side glances.
“What’s with this question? Of course not. Nobody would think of following me.” Botta frowned and stared at me strangely.
I sighed in relief but didn’t lean back.
“Good. Our discussion must not be heard by anyone.” I confided while still whispering.
Botta scratched the beard at his chin and lifted a single eyebrow.
“Now you got me curious. I haven’t seen you in weeks and now that you decide to speak to me, it is something of utmost confidentiality?” A mocking smile made his way on his lips. I stared back at him and my face got even more serious.
“Please Botta, don’t play with me. I was on a difficult investigation and I didn’t get much time off in two months. I’m really sorry for having… ignored you.” I apologized, it being the only thing I could do. It was true I hadn’t had time to do anything else. Botta sniggered.
“Don’t worry about it, I was only joking. So, what is it you need to talk about?” He asked me, at last serious.
I was going to answer, but the waitress came back with our drinks and I waited until she was gone before talking.
“I need you to do me a favor.”
“Go on…” Botta seemed to become skeptical.
“As I’ve heard, you know well Mithos Yggdrasil?” I decided to play all my cards. It wouldn’t serve me to hide him anything.
“Yeah… And what of it?” His tone was still prudent, like he knew where I was going. I took a deep breath.
“I need you to help me infiltrate his organization.” I confessed and waited for the explosion of anger. I wasn’t far from the truth. A look of utter horror made his way on my friend’s face.
“What!? Are… Are you mad!?” He hissed between his teeth, cautious to not be heard by anyone.
“I beg of you, your organization often deals with his, right? You could surely help me! You’re the only one I can ask such a thing from.” I begged him, hoping the despair in my voice would let him know of the importance of my request.
He shook his head and closed his eyes.
“You don’t know who you are dealing with. Mithos Yggdrasil is Japan’s most dangerous man! If he discovers your identity…”
“I know all that. But I’m on an important investigation and I don’t intend to drop it. And Bryant already gave me his permission.” I tried to convince my friend.
Botta sighed and took a long gulp of sake.
“It’s crazy… If I decided to help you infiltrate, I said if, you will not only risk your life, but mine also!!” He got worked up and glanced behind him.
“I will not let them catch me.” I affirmed without being sure of it myself.
Botta opened his mouth to answer back, but our plates arrived and he had to wait until we were alone again. He stared at me severely.
“Always so sure of yourself, huh? And I suppose you will not change your mind?”
“Absolutely not.” I stared back at him with an ardor he knew well.
Botta was silent for a long time, looking at his full plate. He finally lifted his head.
“I see. I will accept at only one condition.” His firm voice told me he wouldn’t go back on this. At least, I realized he intended to help me. I took a bite of my food before asking him what would be his condition.
“And what is it?”
“I want to know why you so want to arrest him.”
I chew nervously on my bottom lip. I didn’t want to tell him the reason, but I hadn’t much choice, did I? I spit it out, but hide some details for now. Hopefully I wouldn’t have to tell them.
“He sent someone to assassinate the family of one of his men. Innocents who didn’t have anything to do with all this…” I whispered in a broken voice, remembering Kratos’ expression.
“I see. But it’s not the only reason, is it? You already let other criminals who did as much go freely without thinking much about it…”
I wanted to curse Botta right now. He knew me too well to know I was hiding part of the truth. I didn’t dare looking him in the eye and I heard him getting impatient.
“I’m listening…” He pushed me to speak.
“Okay. It’s… it’s that man. His name is Kratos. I met him. I promised him I would help avenge his family.” I continued and hoped he would be satisfied. I cursed him again when he spoke.
“And? I don’t see anything new.”
I groaned in annoyance. I couldn’t hide anything from him, could I? But on second thought, he deserved to know. After all, he was going to put his life on the line for me. If Yggdrasil would discover my true identity, Botta certainly would not escape unharmed.
“It’s because I… I saw myself in him, Botta. The same suffering, the same emptiness, the same lack of understanding… I know too well what he’s feeling. I saw it in his eyes… That gaze is haunting me! I don’t want to see such sadness on his face ever again…” I whispered in a broken voice, remembering yesterday evening.
“But you know like me that vengeance doesn’t bring anything! He will only be more broken in the end…” Botta replied sadly. I knew he was right, but I couldn’t bring myself to accept it…
“I know. But if it can make him feel better for a time…”
Botta sighed and looked me in the eye.
“Okay. I’ll help you. But you know, you asking me now came at the right time.” Botta said and I looked confused.
“What do you mean?”
“That one of Yggdrasil’s informants got killed yesterday. He contacted me and asked me to provide him another one or I could say goodbye to my business with him.” My friend groaned and I saw that this perspective wasn’t too charming for him. He didn’t seem to like Yggdrasil much, but he couldn’t refuse his request. I imagined that having ties with the most influent yakuza’s family was a great asset for undercover investigations.
“So I assume I will take his place?” I asked in a neutral voice.
“Exactly. It will be the most effective mean for your investigation, but also the most dangerous. You will have to infiltrate other families and clans for his sake. It will be difficult, I don’t hide it.”
“I don’t fear death.” I confessed with a certainty that seemed to destabilize him. What could I say? It was the truth. Nothing in this world was worth it. I had nothing left. If I had to die for justice, so be it. I would accept it. Botta smiled sadly at me. I think he understood my feelings.
“I see. Listen, Yggdrasil asked that I meet him today with the new informant. You think you’ll be ready by then?”
“No problem.” I nodded with conviction.
“Then meet me at two this afternoon at my headquarters. We will go to Yggdrasil shortly after.”
“Perfect. I’ll see you later.” I told him before leaving the bill on the table. I got up and heard Botta’s voice behind me.
“Yuan! I hope you know what you’re doing…” He whispered and I smiled before saying him goodbye.
No, I didn’t know what I was doing. Any sane man that cared for his life would avoid confronting Yggdrasil like I was about to do. But I wasn’t a sane man. I would do anything to make him pay for his crimes, no matter what I would have to sacrifice in the process…

When I came to see Botta at his work, time passed too rapidly for my own taste. He gave me a false name and built me an identity inside his family. After that, we went to the building that sheltered the most dangerous criminal in all Japan… I felt myself becoming nervous as we got out of Botta’s car and I looked at the gloomy building. Here was the place where Kratos was working… I didn’t know how he could stay sane while spending so many hours inside that place… Botta tapped my shoulder and smiled at me. I smiled back and shrugged my discomfort away. I prepared myself mentally for my meeting with Mithos Yggdrasil.

When we got in, we were guided to the audience chamber by a young man with an arrogant face and orange hair. At the first glance, I didn’t like him one bit. His way of walking, like the place was his own, was getting on my nerves. I tried my best to not let it show. I had to keep my mask on. He opened the door to the room and nodded his head towards it, beckoning us to come in. I followed Botta and bowed respectively before Yggdrasil. When I lifted my head back, I could take in my environment. I was currently in a large room with the same dull colors than the rest of the hallways and the only furniture it contained was three chairs. In the most sumptuous was sitting a man with long golden hair and with strange white clothes. Mithos Yggdrasil. It couldn’t be anyone other than him. My gaze came to rest on the man that was sitting at his right. Kratos. I met his eyes and saw surprise in his dark pupils. Along with something else. Anger? Maybe. I forced my gaze away to avoid having my mask broken. I wouldn’t have a second chance. I saw the young arrogant man coming to sit at Yggdrasil’s left. I looked carefully at Yggdrasil’s cruel and malicious face. That man who was the cause of so many people’s death… I understood, with only one glance, why Kratos dreaded him so. His presence only made me swallow harshly, but I refused to look away. If I wanted him to accept me in his organization, I had to show him I didn’t fear him. I gazed at his prying eyes and let Botta introduce me. He made me go forward and I kneeled before Yggdrasil, never leaving his gaze.
“Yggdrasil, I present to you Sano Nagano. He’s one of my best informants. He has never let me down. He should be more than enough to replace Magnius.” Botta announced in a neutral and equal voice.
“I’m at your service, Yggdrasil.” I replied and hoped my voice didn’t show my nervousness.
I humbly lowered my head and waited in silence. I heard a cold and calculated voice and shivers ran down my back. I didn’t need to look up to know who had laughed. I heard someone getting up and soon saw a pair of white shoes in my vision. A hand gripped my chin and lifted my face roughly. My gaze met blue eyes as cold as ice. I did my best to support that gaze piercing deep into my soul. I managed to keep my mask in place and calmed the beating of my heart. Soon, I saw his lips curl into a nasty smile.
“I love that look. So much determination! Anji, you brought me a faithful dog this time! He seems so much better than Magnius.” Yggdrasil seemed amused while turning his head to look at Botta who nodded his head.
I managed to contain my anger and indignation as I was treated like an animal. One glance at Kratos told me he also had problems retaining his anger. His eyes darkened and his fists clenched painfully on his tights. Suddenly, Mithos released his hold on me and sat back on his chair. He looked at Botta in a disinterested way like he wasn’t worth his time anymore.
“I’m keeping him with me. You’re lucky this time again, Anji. You better never disappoint me.” His last words were pronounced threateningly.
I saw my friend turn paler and he nodded sharply. I understood now why that man was known to be dangerous… He was unpredictable and could throw away anyone as long as they weren’t useful anymore. I realized I was going to play in a game way more dangerous than I first thought. I tried to keep my head cool.
“You can leave now. I’ll contact you later to tell you if your precious subordinate is as good as you claim it.” I felt his gaze burning me and I got up without showing any emotions.
Botta bowed respectfully and turned back to leave without a word. He passed besides me and brushed my shoulder in a movement unnoticeable to the others in the room. It gave me more courage. I stood still and waited for Yggdrasil to tell me what to do. He threw me a glance before turning towards Kratos.
“Kratos, how about showing to your new “brother” the place where he will have to work from now on?” He asked him in a honeyed tone that sent me new shivers. Really, that man was dangerously unpredictable… Kratos nodded and got up.
“As you wish, Mithos.” He answered in a dead voice unrecognizable to me.

Kratos told me to follow him and I did with apprehension. I had read in his eyes that something was off. He turned the corner of the hallway without a word. Wasn’t he supposed to make me visit the headquarters I was going to spend time in for the next months? I frowned before his silence. We walked like this for several minutes and I felt myself being lost in a labyrinth where all looked the same. We were passing by a room with the door opened when Kratos slowed down. I was going to ask him what he was doing when a strong hand grabbed the hem of my coat and pushed me forcibly inside the bedroom. Irritated, I turned back to face Kratos and was going to ask him what was his problem, but he didn’t let me. Kratos threw me brutally against the wall, pressing his forearm against my neck and I found myself almost unable to breathe. He closed the door with a strong kick and threw me a murderous glance.
“Would you care telling me what the fuck you’re doing here, in the name of God!?” He asked me warningly and I couldn’t help the shivers than ran through my body.
I gripped his forearm, trying to dislodge him so I could breathe. I was almost suffocating. But he didn’t budge; instead he only pressed his body closer to mine. I groaned in annoyance.
“I could explain…if you would just… let me breathe…” I panted, unable to articulate clearly under the pressure of his arm.
I felt him release his hold a little, enough to make sure I wouldn’t die from suffocation, but he didn’t let go. His gaze was piercing through me as intensely as before.
“And exactly why would I do that?” He replied harshly.
“Because you… care…” I managed to answer the first thing that came to mind.
It seemed to suffice him. He quickly released me and started to pace furiously around the room. I rubbed my sore throat and regained my breathing, watching him all the while. He seemed highly annoyed. I was too. Who in their right mind would not be after being treated like that?
“What’s gotten into you, Kratos!?” I seethed furiously.
His reaction came rather quickly. He turned rapidly to face me and his gaze threw daggers at me. I was stunned and couldn’t turn away from his dark and threatening eyes.
“What do you mean, what’s gotten into me!? I should be the one to ask you that! How could you possibly have the idea to come here? It’s suicide!!” Kratos exploded and paced around the room once more.
“You know as well as I do that it’s my only option to arrest him.” I replied more coldly than I would have liked. Seeing him angering against me as I was trying to help him was irritating me.
My words angered him even more. He walked furiously to me and his hand hit brutally the wall beside my head. I jumped before his surge of violence and his face came close to mine.
“If that’s the case, you should just drop the investigation!! I didn’t reveal you all these secrets so you could go trying to throw your life away like that!” His body was so close to mine that I felt him tremble in anger.
“I don’t fear danger.” I whispered with conviction.
Kratos put his free hand on the other side of my head. I was literally trapped between him and the wall. I stared at him while he continued to vent his anger on me. Not like I blamed him. I understood his reaction, even if I didn’t approve it.
“You don’t know who you are dealing with!! If he discovers your true identity, you’ll not get away with only a broken member or two… He will kill you with the cruelest and slowest mean he can muster, I can assure you.” He warned me seriously, closing his eyes. I’m sure he was imagining the scene right now.
This time I had enough. I was fed up with people telling me what to do, trying to make me change my mind. I pushed Kratos away roughly and glared at him.
“Stop telling me what to do! I won’t change my mind!! I decided to help you and that’s what I’m going to do, whatever the mean!” I seethed against him.
I knew he didn’t deserve me yelling at him, but my frustration had risen up during the day and I had more than enough. I waited for him to argue, but he only lowered his head and came to sit on the bed. He took his head in his hands and his hair hid his face from my view. I couldn’t see his expression.
“Why are you acting like this? You don’t trust me? Maybe you don’t think I can defend myself?” I asked him, awaiting a truthful answer.
Kratos had to trust me. If he didn’t, how could we possibly work together to stop Yggdrasil? He slowly shook his head.
“It’s not that. This world is a lot more brutal than you can imagine, Yuan.” He whispered in a downcast voice.
My feet guided me towards the bed and I sat next to him. I tried to see his face.
“I know it, but I must do it, no matter what I have to endure to stop the murderer of your family.” I replied in a firm tone, but softer than before.
Kratos lifted his head and I saw that look again. The same expression I swore myself never to see again. I avoided his eyes. I couldn’t bear to see it…
“Yuan, please understand… I don’t want anyone else to die because of me.”
I looked at him again. He believed he was responsible for the death of his family and that he would also be responsible for my death if it happened… What an idiot. I had taken alone the decision to put myself in such a danger.
“And I don’t want that bastard to get away after what he did to your family.” I replied in a tone that wouldn’t give him place to argue anymore.
He sighed and a sad smile dawned on his lips.
“You’re too stubborn, you know that?” He observed with a touch of humor.
I smiled and laughed softly.
“I’m often told that, in fact.” I thought of Bryant, who had said the same thing this morning.
Kratos regained his seriousness and squeezed my shoulder, obtaining my attention.
“But I’m serious, you know. If you ever come to die because of me, I…” His voice wavered and I cut him short. I placed my hand on the one that was on my shoulder and held it tight.
“It will not happen. I will not let the situation degenerate to that extent. I beg you, trust me. Anyway, I can’t go back now.” I tried to convince him with strong words and it proved to be difficult since I didn’t believe them myself.
“I really hope you are right… really.” He said weakly.
Silence came over us and I got conscious that my hand was still on his. Kratos seemed to notice it too and stared at our hands. I swiftly removed my hand and diverted my gaze. Kratos also took back his hand and I felt his gaze burning me. I didn’t know what had gotten into me. I was overly nervous. He was the only one that was able to bring me in that state. I tried to find something to say to break this embarrassing silence. I then thought about something I had promised to give to Kratos.
“Oh! I almost forgot. Here.” I searched in my pocket and dig out the key to my apartment.
I presented it to him and Kratos stared at it.
“It’s…” He began hesitantly.
“The key to my apartment. You will be able to come as you please.”
“Thanks…” He took the key and put it in the pocket of his jacket.
I got up and reached for the door before turning to face Kratos.
“How about you really make me visit the place now, instead of throwing me into a wall?” I teased him while thinking back at the brutal way he had treated me.
I saw him scowl before getting up.
“It’s not a game, you know.” He scolded me like a parent would do his child. Really now. He thought I was treating this situation like a game? It was perfectly the contrary.
“I know that, but imagine one second that I get lost because you haven’t made me visit like Yggdrasil asked you to do? He will become suspicious.” I remarked.
Kratos seemed to accept my answer. He got passed me and opened the door. He threw a glance in the hallway to see if there was anyone passing by.
“Here’s hoping he isn’t already…” He muttered and motioned me to follow him.
I agreed with him. We had to avoid arousing his suspicion. This kind of man was ready to use whatever the mean to uncover a plot against him, I was sure of it. I was already dreading my next meeting with Yggdrasil. I only hoped not to be left alone with him. That man was scaring me more than I would ever admit...

A/N :
Littlerosebud : And now with this chapter, the investigation began. How will it go for Yuan and Kratos? And what will be the first mission Yggdrasil will give to Yuan? Find out in the next chapter!!

Chapter 5 will surely come out soon, since my dear friend Saenda has just finished school and will have more time now. Keep a lookout for it!!

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