Talk to Me

AN: And we’re sprinting, yes sprinting through another chapter! Boy, I really had no idea I’d get to like this story so much. Thanks again to the loyal reviewers! I love reading all your comments! You guys are great, really.

Jester: You know you da man! Thanks for the lines (and laughs!)

VeryNaughtyOttsel: Let’s hope so. I’m thinkin’ next time probably won’t be an accident…

Sej: I’d like to see where this fic is going, too. So far it’s been off and running on its own and I’ve just been trying to keep up and keep it at least semi-structured. Oh well, it obviously has its own destination in mind, so I’ll just keep updating until it decides it’s finished.

Disclaimer: Lemme check... no, no, still not owning or profiting off anything. If I was you’d know it, as the next Jak game would be a spin-off of one of those Japanese dating sims. Then everybody could try their hand at making Jak fall in love with them! Would that be fun or what? Somebody should bring that up to Naughty Dog…

-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

Jak’s morning began abruptly with a high velocity ottsel to the face.

“Up an’ at ‘em, Jakkie-boy!” Daxter crowed, bouncing on his friend’s chest and tugging at his ears. “The sun is shinin’, the birds are singin’, and it’s a beautiful day full’a fresh new opportunities!”

It was barely dawn. The racer blinked hazily up at his furry companion, fighting down a yawn so large it threatened to split his face in half. “You’ve been drinking coffee again, haven’t you.”

“Don’t worry, big guy, I’m way ahead of ya! I saved ya a mug an’ it’s got milk in it just like ya like it.” The ottsel had the audacity to pinch Jak’s cheeks before bounding off in the direction of the kitchen. “Course the milk’s a little sour, but it should be okay. Can ya believe we forgot ta get more milk?”

Jak watched him go, then rolled over and pulled the blankets over his rumpled head. This made two mornings in a row that Dax had managed to be awake before him. That was possibly a new record. He wondered blearily which was worse: the sleepy, grouchy Dax who had to be forcibly extracted from his blanket nest or the perky, hyper-caffeinated Dax who consumed an entire pot of coffee minus one cup and was ready to take on the universe with a flyswatter.

“I take it you didn’t sleep well?” he called from under the covers.

“Not a wink.” Daxter’s reply was sinfully cheery as he scampered back into the bedroom, Jak’s coffee in hand. “Here ya go, buddy, bedside delivery! Careful, it’s hot.”

“Thanks. I didn’t snore last night, did I?”

“Not exactly.”

Jak finally sat up to take the mug. He watched his friend pace the length of the bed and back again, unable to keep still. Yep, the ottsel was wired. “Shouldn’t you have at least gone back to normal to drink all that? I thought we talked about how a whole pot is way too much stimulation for that tiny body to handle.”

Daxter airily waved it off. “Eh, it’s fine. These’re special circumstances. B’sides, me normal might be too much stimulation fer *your* body ta handle.”

Coffee sprayed everywhere as Jak choked and coughed, staring at him in absolute horror. “What?!”

The ottsel merely laughed, aiming a grin and a pointer finger at him. “Gotcha!”

Jak attempted a weak laugh in return, brushing at what was rapidly becoming a coffee stain on the sheets. He didn’t like that joke, not at *all.* It hit too disturbingly close to home. “Uh, ha-ha! Yeah, you got me. Good one, Dax. You’re such a kidder...”

//Please Precursors, let him be kidding.//

Daxter rolled off the bed, squirmed under it, shot out the other side and shimmied up the dresser. In seconds he had wrestled the top drawer open and was throwing random articles of clothing at his friend. “Better get a move on, pal, we’ve got lots ta do today.”

“Such as?” Jak ducked as a wrinkled shirt went flying by. Dax was acting very strange this morning, and somehow he couldn’t contribute it entirely to the influx of caffeine. He didn’t know quite why, but he had a bad feeling about this.

“You gotta report back ta command central before Ashe kicks yer ass inside out. An’ more importantly, I gotta go talk ta Tessy-kins.”

Jak was about to comment on Daxter’s priorities when a small triangle of delicate, lacy fabric landed on the tip of his ear and hung. Slowly he pulled it off, staring down at it incredulously. “Are these panties?”

The ottsel froze, ears and tail flicking upright. “Uh...”

“Daxter, is this or is this not women’s underwear?” Prompted by some unknown force, Jak gingerly glanced at the little tag. A tiny “K” had been carefully stitched into the label. “Oh sweet Creators, it’s Keira’s! She’s gonna kill me! Dax, what the hell were you thinking?!”

It wasn’t clear whether Daxter fell off the dresser on purpose or as a side effect of his hilarity. Jak leaped from the bed and chased him from the room before dashing over to rifle through the open drawer.

“Dammit, Daxter!”

- // - // - // - // -

“Look at it this way, Jak. Ya can let me keep my hard-earned booty or ya can take ‘em back yerself an’ explain ta the girls why ya have their lingerie.”

Dax was enjoying himself immensely, stationed as usual on Jak’s shoulder as they walked through town toward the Naughty Ottsel. This time, however, the most adorably incriminating blush faintly stained the racer’s cheeks, and Dax was at the perfect level to see and comment on it.

“Alright, Dax, Tess’s underwear I can accept. That’s fine. That’s perfectly normal.” Jak held up a hand and began ticking off fingers. “But to have a pair of Tess’s, Keira’s, Ashelin’s, Rayne’s, *and* a pair from almost every female racer we’ve faced in the past two months is absolutely not—”

Daxter sighed. “Would it make ya feel better if I threw a pair of yer tightie-whities in there, too?”

Jak sputtered indignantly. “No it wouldn’t!”

Chuckling lightly, the ottsel patted his friend’s hot cheek. If Jakkie-boy was flustered now, Dax couldn’t wait to see his reaction to the fun that was in store. For, whether he knew it or not, the oblivious green-blonde had opened a floodgate, and the wave was bearing down fast.

//It’s all or nothin’, big guy,// he thought, unconsciously aiming a nip at Jak’s slightly pink ear tip as it darted past his face. //Hope yer ready ta swim.//

“You’ve got fifteen minutes,” Jak growled, depositing his passenger on a bench at the back of the bar. “I’m going to go over to Keira’s place and see if she’ll let us have that zoomer.”

Daxter grinned. “What, don’t tell me ya don’t wanna walk all that way again just ta possibly get thrown out two days runnin’?”

“Us getting thrown out yesterday was your fault, if I remember correctly.” Jak raised a brow at the slightly disturbing memory. “But if Ashelin doesn’t get this over with today it’s not going to happen. Want your clothes?”

“Nah, babe, Orange Lightning’s got this one covered.”

Jak nodded, ruffled his friend’s fur, and was gone.

Dax watched him walk away. He debated for a moment about telling the racer there was a pair of polka dot panties hanging out of his sleeve, then went inside. Jak was a smart guy. Surely he’d figure it out before he reached the garage.

“Oh, Tessy-kins!”

“Daxxie!” Tess squealed as the ottsel leaped into her arms. Squeezing him tightly, she planted a big kiss right behind his goggles. “What brings you in this morning? I thought for sure you boys would stay the night at the palace.”

Daxter rolled his eyes. “Pfft, so Torn an’ Ashelin were gettin’ freaky in a closet an’ I just so happened ta catch ‘em in the act, big whoop. No reason fer Ashe ta get her bra in a knot an’ toss us out.”

The blonde’s own eyes widened considerably. “Oooh... I always knew those two would get together! Do tell!”

“Sorry, baby, not today. I don’t got a lotta time an’ there’s somethin’ else I wanna talk about.”

The old saloon was quiet save for the echoes of voices and passing vehicles outside. Tess made it a point to never open before noon, so for a while they had the place to themselves. Daxter hopped down onto a stool as the blonde drifted back behind the counter.

“Can I get you something to drink?”

“Coffee’d be good. I drank what we had at our place.”

Tess took one look at her little sweetie’s enlarged pupils and frizzed fur and placed a small cup before him. “Here’s some nice fresh juice. So tell me, what did you want to talk about? It wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain ruggedly handsome racer, would it?”

“Yeah, that’s it exactly!” Daxter slurped the juice, strictly on the grounds that it contained natural sugars. “Tessy, how do I make myself think Jak’s handsome?”

“Uh...” For once in her career as a professional barkeep and amateur relationship counselor, Tess didn’t know what to say. “W-why would you want to do that?”

Knowing that she was possibly the only person he could be completely open with on the subject, Daxter began to talk. “See baby, it’s like this. I think yer right, an’ Jak’s in love with me. I’m cool with that. An’ last night I decided I’m gonna see what we can do with it. I mean, sure I love Jakkie-boy as my best buddy already, but any relationship we try ain’t goin’ *nowhere* unless I can make myself think he’s hot. Ya see?”

Tess blinked, elbow propped on the bar and chin on her palm. “Let me get this straight. In less than twenty four hours you’ve agreed to and coped with the fact that your best friend, who is also a man, loves you romantically and wants to jump your bones.”

“He digs the Orange Lightning in the hot an’ sweaty way, ya catch me?” Dax agreed, tail swishing behind him. They were making progress.

“And now you want to pursue a relationship with this friend, but you need to determine if there’s anything in it for you by seeing whether or not the guy can turn you on, am I right?”

“I always said ya were perceptive.” Doubting that she would be giving him any more juice, Daxter pushed his glass to the side. “I haven’t said anything ta the big guy yet. So Tessy, now that ya know what’s what, any suggestions? Amazingly adept thing that I am, I’m sorta in the dark on this one.”

“Hmm...” The blonde tapped her chin thoughtfully. She wanted to help her little sweetie ever so much, but she had never been confronted with a problem quite as unique as this one before. “Maybe... if you picture him in a dress...”

They stared at one another.

“Bwa-hahahaha!” Dax howled with laughter, nearly slipping off his stool. “Oh Precursors, that’s great!”

Tess was giggling helplessly, red face buried in her hands. “That’s so bad! With the sideburns and the—heehee!—the little goatee—!”

“No, no, wait!” Daxter pounded weakly on the counter with a limp hand, tears of mirth tracking furrows through the fur on his cheeks. “Skanky nurse’s outfit!”

Tess shrieked, slumping over the bar to laugh hysterically into her folded arms. Daxter fought his unstable way up onto the counter next to her, collapsing across her shaking shoulders.

“Yeah, with a short skirt an’ heels an’ —hahaha!—lacy garters an’ a cute lil' nurse’s cap—!”

Luckily, the front door crashed open before either of the merrymakers could suffocate themselves with laughter. Jak stomped in, an absolutely furious look on his blood-red face. “Daxter!”

“Eeek!” Tess cowered as Jak grabbed up the still laughing ottsel by the scruff of the neck and shook him in midair.

“Why didn’t you tell me, huh? Why didn’t you tell me?!”

“Tell ya—haha-ouch!—tell ya what, big guy?”

“That I had a damn pair of pink underwear hanging out of my jacket!” The racer’s face looked hot enough to fry an egg on. “I got to the garage and Keira kept looking at me funny. You know what she said when she finally handed me the keys?”

“I suppose ‘no’ isn’t the answer yer goin’ for?”

“She said, ‘That’s a cute way to try and get my attention, Jak, but I really don’t have time for a boyfriend right now.’ I’ve never been so embarrassed in my life, you furry little ass!”

“So...” Daxter looked up at his friend as seriously as he could from his hanging position. “I’m guessin’ it’s safe ta say she took the goods back.”

“I should squeeze you,” Jak snarled menacingly, “like a fuzzy orange fruit.”

Dax winced. He really should think before dropping stupid remarks. Oh, well. There was only one way out of the deep shit he was in now: act cute. He gave Jak his most winning smile. “Nah, babe, ya don’t squeeze us ottsels, ya cuddle us nice an’ gentle like! C'mon, you know that. After all, it’s what ya do every night.”

There was no readable change of expression from the racer as Daxter playfully tickled at the underside of the arm that held him captive. However, he did concede to lower the miscreant slowly back to the bar. “We’re going. You have two minutes to wrap things up.”

“Whatever you say, big guy.” Daxter offered a mock salute as his friend stalked out, letting the door slam behind him. As per the norm, it had all worked out in the end. Jak didn’t smash him for his little oversight, and he didn’t rag Jak for losing one of the centerpieces of his panty collection. It was all good.

Tess managed a wobbly smile, slowly straightening up from her hiding place behind the bar. “Boy, he’s a little scary when he’s mad!”

Dax smoothed down his ruffled back fur as best he could. Rotating his shoulders to ease the sting from being picked up so irreverently, he pushed back images of shocking white hair, dead black eyes, horns, claws, and fangs. “You have no idea.”

“So what are you going to do, Daxxie?” she pressed, collecting the dirty glass from where it had rolled. “You’re not going to try anything while he’s so mad at you, are you?”

“Sure, baby. What better cover could I ask for? I can pretend I’m just bein’ chummy, like I’m tryin’ ta butter him up an’ make him forgive me. Then, when I’ve thrown him off guard…” Dax smirked, rubbing his hands together deviously. “Initiate phase one of mission: ‘Jak as a Lurv Object!’ B’sides, he’ll probably forget all about this by then.”

Outside, a zoomer gave a warning rev.

“Whoops, looks like time’s up. See ya later, Tessy-kins!”

Tess waved as he ran for the exit. “Good luck sweetie! Let me know how it turns out!”

- // - // - // - // -

Jak was pouting and he knew it. If there was one thing he absolutely hated, it was being made a fool of. He hated it when Torn put him down for his age, he hated it when Sig treated him like an inexperienced rookie, and he hated it when girls got the wrong idea about him.

//Since I’m not even interested in them anyway,// he thought mutinously. //Oh no, I can’t just be simple and normal and actually try to flirt with the girls. I’ve gotta go for the furry nitwit who keeps getting me into these situations in the first place. That’s smart, Jak, really smart.//

In all actuality, it would probably take very little encouragement to get Keira to date him. Hell, Ashelin might even be persuaded if a certain covert kiss was anything to go by. So why go for the one he would never be able to have?

//Because I love him,// he acknowledged, moodily drumming gloved fingers on his knee. //And if that doesn’t make me a real fool, nothing does.//

He was still pouting when the bundle of energy in question flew down the steps and landed on the back of the borrowed zoomer. “Orange Lightning reportin’ an’ ready fer action! Let’s hit the road, Jak!”

The racer snorted and cranked the sleek machine, resisting the impulse to smack Daxter off into the dirt. Alright, the whole underwear ordeal had been an honest accident. His embarrassment was in the past. Time to move on and get back to business… and pointedly ignore the way Daxter was squirming around positioning himself on the leather seat between his legs.

“Hey, you’re gonna fall off if you stay there.”

“Not if ya don’t take the curves like there’s a killer metal head behind us.” Either completely missing or completely ignoring Jak’s halfhearted effort to get him to move, Daxter nestled in with his back to the racer’s stomach. “B’sides, it’s better than bein’ flapped around like a flag on yer shoulder.”

“Alright, but don’t count on me to grab you if we wreck or flip or something,” Jak muttered. Fighting the urge to keep a protective hand around Daxter despite his indifferent words, he turned them toward the palace. Chalk up another day that was starting out crap. He could only pray that this much-lauded meeting went smoothly and they weren’t going to ask him to do something stupid.

- // - // - // - // -

“It’s the stupidest damn thing I’ve ever heard!”

Daxter jumped a mile, landing on all fours with hackles raised and teeth bared as Jak slammed the door of the guest suite he had been napping in. “Dammit, Jak, ya tryin’ ta give me a heart attack?!”

An inarticulate grunt was all the answer he got.

Daxter sighed, ears slanting back in annoyance.

This was just perfect. He had waited all day and most of the evening for the racer to return, and when he did he was in an even worse mood than before. The ottsel watched as Jak began to pace the large, ornately decorated room, warily settling back down on the pillow he had claimed as his own. Obviously the little powwow hadn’t gone well.

Finally, after throwing off his gloves and jacket and viciously kicking a random footstool, Jak heaved a deep sigh and dropped down on the big bed next to Daxter. A rough hand plowed through disheveled green-blonde. “Sorry.”

“Uh-huh.” Leaving the pillow, this time at a more leisurely pace, Dax flopped down across his best friend’s knee. “So are ya gonna tell me what’s stupid, or do I hafta guess?”

Jak groaned, falling backwards across the mattress with hands over his head. Dax took the move as an open invitation and immediately made himself at home on the racer’s chest. It was sure to be an interesting story if it had Jak pissed off that bad, and he wanted the best seat in the house for it.

“Okay, shoot.”

Staring morosely at the high ceiling, Jak cut right to the chase. “They proposed that I pretend to turn traitor on you guys and try to join Mizo’s team.”

There was silence.

“Huh?”

“That’s what I said. Apparently they think that I’ll be able to gather information on the opposition’s tactics and strategies that I can secretly report back for our benefit. Then I slip out on them and rejoin our team. You know... like a spy or something.”

Daxter considered, chin braced on furry knuckles. “May I be frank, Jak?”

“Sure.”

“That’s the stupidest damn thing I ever heard!” The ottsel was suitably disgusted. “What’s wrong with what we’ve been doin’, I ask ya? Ya know… racin’ ‘em, beatin’ ‘em, an’ rubbin’ it in their faces?”

The racer sighed, reaching out to pet frizzed orange fur. “You got me. I thought we were doing pretty good.”

“We’ve been doin’ *damn* good! We ain’t lost a race yet! Whose lame-ass idea was this, anyways?”

Jak had to smile. “I didn’t ask until after it pissed me off. Then they wouldn’t tell me.”

“Yeah, that means Tattooed Wonder cooked it up.” Daxter huffed, finally allowing the petting to calm him somewhat. “Ah, well. It ain’t nothin’ ta get mad about. Even if it is totally pointless, this’ll be a walk in the park. And hey, if ya need help convincin’ the other side that we really bailed out I’ll just tell ‘em exactly what I think of Torn! We’ve been on missions a million times worse than that, right buddy?”

Jak coughed awkwardly, avoiding eye contact. “Um. About the ‘we’.”

“Jak?” At once sensing that something unpleasant was afoot, the ottsel immediately went on full alert. “What about the ‘we’?”

“They don’t want you to go with me, Dax.”

“What?!”

“Ashelin thinks it’ll be easier for Mizo to believe I’ve deserted you guys if I leave you behind,” the racer spit out all in a rush. “Everyone knows we’re inseparable. What better way to prove that I’ve severed all ties with my former team than to abandon my ‘pet’ with them? If you went along with me they’d only be suspicious that you were carrying messages back and forth, and they’d probably be right. It’d be too dangerous for you, Dax.”

Daxter was understandably livid. These were their supposed “friends” who had voted for letting Jak wander off into the middle of the enemy base, alone, for what sounded like an extended period of time. Yeesh, the things these people came up with when he wasn’t there to keep them in line! That was the last time he would skip out on one of their meetings, no matter how boring he found most of them.

“Dangerous my furry orange ass! If ya went in there by yerself Razer would rape ya! Ya told our fearless leaders they’re cracked, right, an’ they can forget it? That’s what ya told ‘em, right Jak?”

“They told me to calm down and sleep on it.” Jak’s mood was not improving. “I mostly just wanted to see what you thought before I told them to... you know...”

“Screw off?” Dax supplied helpfully.

“Yeah, that’s it.”

Daxter slowly relaxed again.

Well, of course he had nothing to worry about. Jak wouldn’t leave him. Not for a week, not for an hour if it wasn’t a deadly necessity. He would go back into that conference room tomorrow at Jak’s side and tell the whole team as much himself. If there was one thing the Demolition Duo had, it was solidarity.

Well, solidarity until the explosions started. Then half the duo enhanced that closeness even more by going down the other half’s shirt for the duration of the fight. Just to, you know, provide as much support as possible.

The ottsel smiled and shook himself off, trying to banish the bad vibes along with a slight case of static cling brought on by quick, rough stroking of the fur. “Well then, that’s settled. Their plan’s a definite no-go. We don’t need any inside info on those losers, we just need ta keep handin’ ‘em their own asses on the track!”

“Yeah...”

Dax could literally feel Jak unwinding. Hmm, maybe the thought of being separated from his loudmouthed shoulder ornament had shaken the green-blonde up more than he let on. Soothingly the ottsel patted his friend’s chest. “That’s right, big guy, ease up. It was just a stupid idea; they can’t make ya do anythin’ ya don’t wanna do.”

Jak groaned, rubbing at his tired eyes before pulling Daxter’s napping pillow over his face. “Dammit, Dax, I feel like a jerk. My face hurts from scowling all the time. If I’m not asleep I’m on edge and knotted up, and I’m sick of it!”

Ears drooping sympathetically Daxter slid off Jak’s chest, ready to do a supportive cheek nuzzle if need be. “Anythin’ I can do ta make ya feel better? B’sides make the goofy animal noise? Which I know ya really get a kick outta that, pal, but it just does nothin’ fer me.”

Jak managed to smile slightly, pulling the pillow away and tossing it back toward the head of the bed. “Thanks, Dax, but no thanks. Last time you tried to cheer me up I had to listen to your theory of why Razer and Erol would make a good couple.”

Dax grinned. He remembered that as one of his better comedic scenarios, though it probably still came back once in a while to thoroughly freak his friend out. “Oh, yeah. Well, if ya wanna escape traumatic mental images fer the night I can always tell ya some Krew fat jokes instead.”

“Yeah, I really don’t think so.” To Daxter’s credit, Jak was smiling in earnest as he shoved himself upright and got off the bed. “I think I’ll just go take a hot bath, or something. That’s supposed to be relaxing, right?”

Dax’s ears perked, swiveling like twin periscopes. He had forgotten that their borrowed room had a bath! Tonight he wouldn’t have to settle for two inches maximum of lukewarm water to roll in if he felt like getting good and soaked. “Oh, yeah! Right behind ya, buddy!”

“You always have loved water, haven’t you?” Jak chuckled, effortlessly balancing on one foot to remove a boot. Daxter, poised to leap from the bed and beat his friend to the bathroom, froze.

This was it. The perfect chance to start his experiment.

Jak was undressing right in front of him. And, not that it hadn’t happened countless times before, this time he had a reason to watch. Slowly, eyes never leaving the oblivious racer, Dax sank back to the mattress.

//That’s it, Jakkie-boy, strip fer papa.// He watched avidly as the second boot hit the floor and Jak moved on, unfastening myriad buckles and slinking out of his tight leather racing chaps like a tree snake shedding its skin. //Pardon the pun, but we’ll get ta the bottom of this in no time.//

It was time to think appreciative thoughts. Now, what about Jak could be considered physically attractive? Daxter never really had been one to actively admire much of anything that wasn’t nicely endowed and female or full and a container of liquor, but he did his best.

How could a torso that looked as if it had been chiseled out of solid rock be comfortable enough to curl up and doze off on? he wondered absently as Jak’s shirt was peeled up and off. Flawless abs and perfectly sculpted pectoral muscles taunted the ottsel somewhat. Arms that could pick up and toss bulky racer parts and effortlessly wield guns almost as tall as Jak himself made him slightly envious.

//The big guy’s got a bod, that’s fer sure,// he sighed a bit moodily. //Good thing I’m not the jealous type. Okay, concentrate! This is supposed ta be turnin’ ya on, here. There’s gotta be somethin’. Anything.//

Unconcernedly, Jak strolled across the room with unbuttoned pants riding low on sinfully narrow hips. Still unaware that he was being watched so closely, he sought out the rucksack that had been dropped carelessly in a corner.

“Watcha lookin’ for?” Daxter asked nonchalantly. It wouldn’t do for Jak to become suspicious of his long stretch of silence. He could still look while they chatted.

“Eh, just my brush. I thought I threw it in here... here it is.” Pulling a few loose green and yellow hairs from the bristles, Jak began to tease out the knots and snags that a long day on the go left behind. “Think I’ll have Keira cut it for me again soon. It just gets too tangled when it's this long.”

Dax grinned. “Maybe it wouldn’t get tangled at all if ya wouldn’t pull it in rage an’ frustration.”

“I doubt that. Anyway, you know me, always have to change up the style. Come on, don’t tell me you don’t think the length and the sideburns together are too much?”

“I’d whack off the cheek hedges before I’d touch the hair.” Sitting up again, the ottsel considered for a moment before beckoning his friend over. “Hey, c’mere fer a sec.”

“Huh?” Jak was puzzled, but nevertheless did as he was told. “Okay...”

“Sit.”

Once the curious racer was situated to his satisfaction, seated on the floor with his back to the side of the bed, Daxter moved so that his legs dangled over the edge and feet touched Jak’s bare shoulders. Grabbing the brush out of his friend’s hand he passed it through the green-blonde mess before him.

Jak chuckled and relaxed, tilting his head back even further to allow Dax and his brush more access. “I guess it’s been a while, huh?”

“Nah, only about four years.” Daxter snorted sarcastically, gathering a handful of hair to avoid pulling at the knots near the nape of Jak’s neck. He flashed a smile Jak couldn’t see as the two-toned strands slipped through his fingers. It really had been a while.

Back when, way back, back before he was small enough to hide behind Jak’s hair, he had sometimes helped the other boy style it. Whether it was first thing in the morning or late at night after a bath, he had always secretly enjoyed messing with Jak’s hair. Most often he had combed gel into it, making sure the stuff didn’t stick and clump. Those had been good times, both boys in Jak’s bedroom, usually giggling madly about one thing or another and trying to keep the volume low enough that Uncle wouldn’t find reason to yell at them to keep it down.

Yeah, it had been a while alright.

Jak was pushing back into the brushing now, hums and flicking ears wordlessly telling the ottsel where to move the brush. If Dax had sought a way to chill the racer out, he had hit on a good one.

Daxter brushed until the hair he held looked and felt like corn silk, and kept going. Having discovered anew how nice the activity was, he didn’t really want to stop. Finally, though, he set the brush down and crossed his arms over the top of Jak’s head. “All done, big guy.”

“Mmm.” Jak stretched contentedly, careful not to throw the ottsel off. “Thanks, Dax. That was really nice.”

“Yeah, well, maybe I’ll let ya get used ta that again. Pendin’ ya don’t chop it all off.” Reaching down, Daxter fondly patted his friend’s cheek. “Don’t know why I stopped doin’ it in the first place.”

He did know, though. Some dark eco had oozed in to irreparably throw off their routine. Since then they had both had more to worry about than the condition of Jak’s hair, let alone the question of who would be messing with it. Dax resolved then and there to take over the job as often as he could from then on, at least until Jak cut it again.

“Well...” Gently easing Daxter off his head and shoulders, Jak got to his feet and stretched again. “I’m gonna go run that bath before it gets any later. With any luck we’ll be up and leaving early tomorrow.”

The ottsel’s ears fell. He cursed silently as Jak disappeared into the bathroom and a pair of faded denims came flying out a moment later. Damn it, he’d screwed around and wasted his opportunity! He felt all warm on the inside, alright, but it was the wrong kind of warm. Gooey and fuzzy rather than the tense and excited he needed.

Jumping off the bed, the ottsel strode with great purpose toward the sound of running water and a happily humming green-blonde. He would get it this time, for sure.

- // - // - // - // -

Jak whistled lightly to himself as he turned off the tap and sank slowly into the hot water and bubbles. Oh yes, this had been a good idea. Daxter’s surprise offer to brush his hair had successfully calmed him down and the bath seemed ready to keep him that way. He might loosen up this evening whether he wanted to or not.

Leaning back in the large tub the racer closed his eyes, enjoying the feeling of warmth enveloping his skin and tiny, shimmering bubbles popping softly all around him. What a way to relax.

“Banzai!”

There was an almighty splash. Jak gaped, eyes flying open as a wave of water hit him right in the face, soaking his perfectly brushed hair. An equally soaked Daxter grinned sheepishly back at him.

“Eh-heh, whoopsie. Kinda forgot ya shouldn’t dive in when yer not two feet tall.”

Jak stared. “What are you doing in here?”

“Well, I ain’t changin’ spark plugs.” Daxter snorted, shaking off a clump of bubbles clinging stubbornly in his red hair. “I’m takin’ a bath with ya, what’s it look like?”

The look on Jak’s face was comical. He slowly shook his own head, trying to make sense of this newest development. “No, I mean, why aren’t you furry?”

“Why should I be?” Daxter unconcernedly made himself at home, nudging the racer’s legs out of the way under the water so he could stretch out his own. “Who’s gonna see? Plus, it’s been forever since I had a bath an’ didn’t hafta skim ottsel hairs outta the water. Good thing this joint don’t skimp on tub sizes, huh?”

Inside, Jak was reeling with disbelief. His friend had had all damn day to mess around in the room as a human, and he only decided to change now so he could lounge naked practically in Jak’s lap?

//I should kill him,// he thought, sinking down in the water until his goatee nearly touched the bubbles and squeezing his eyes shut tightly. //Just kill him now and save myself a lot of grief.//

“You’re mopping up the floor.”

Dax ignored the flooded stone tiles in favor of tracking down the soap and washcloth. “It’ll dry. Hey Jak, remember all those baths we took together as kids? Remember that time we overflowed the tub at yer uncle’s place?”

He did, vaguely. “Yeah. You plugged up the drain and the whole house flooded.” Needless to say, his uncle had been pissed.

“Hey, I was five. Kids do dumb stuff like that. B’sides, if I remember right it was yer foot wrap blockin’ the pipe. ‘Course, ya always did like ta play innocent.”

Jak flushed, shooting a glare at the smug redhead. As long as they kept bantering like this he could almost ignore the fact that he could clearly see every tiny drop of moisture that rolled down Daxter’s slick skin. “Maybe that’s because I usually was innocent. Just because you were a professional hellion doesn’t mean I was devious too.”

“Sure, Jak, sure.” Dax cocked a brow, bucktoothed smirk indicating he didn’t believe a word. “Now turn around.”

Jak jumped in surprise and alarm, more water sloshing up and over the rim of the bath. “What? Why?”

“Jeez, big guy, yer a little slow this evenin’.” The redhead rolled his eyes, waving the soapy cloth in front of his friend’s face. “Lemme wash yer back fer ya.”

“No. Stay back!”

Mass splashing ensued as Jak frantically tried to scramble away, slipping and sliding against the smooth stone. Dax was quick, though, and managed to catch the racer by one ear.

“Jak, what’s yer problem? Yer splashin’ out all our water! Settle down, will ya? Yeesh, it’s like ya don’t want me ta touch ya, or somethin’.”

“I can wash myself,” Jak gritted, forced to keep his head turned toward the pressure on his ear. The very last thing he needed was Daxter’s hands on him in any way. Stranded in the bath, there would be no way to hide what the touch would undoubtedly do to him. He would be exposed, as it were, in more ways than one. He couldn’t let that happen.

“Quit bein’ a baby an’ act thankful I’m takin’ time ta pamper you like this when ya feel down an’ out!” With that Daxter slapped the washcloth over the shoulders in front of him and began to scrub, muttering about ungrateful heroes.

Jak gulped as his ear was finally released, choosing to blame his red face on the hot water and warm, humid air. “Yeah, well... what about you? You were pretty out of it the other day and you never even told me what that was about.”

“Oh, that?” Dax answered nonchalantly, running the cloth up the back of Jak’s neck and eliciting an involuntary shudder from the racer. “I just sorta accidentally found out that Tess has somethin’ goin’ on with that tall, dark, an’ scruffy guy that blows junk up.”

Jak sat up straight, half turning to stare disbelievingly at his friend. “Jinx?!”

“Yeah, the ugly blonde one. Uh, nothin’ against blondes, by the way. Yer blonde’s a lot nicer than his.” Daxter reassured this by giving a lock of Jak’s hair a slight tug. “It’s all sorted out now, anyways.”

“Oh...” Jak was dumbfounded. “Dax... I’m really sorry.” He didn’t really know what to say. Was there some special phrase of consolation you were supposed to use when your best friend had been cheated on?

“Thanks, pal, but it’s fine. I’m over it an’ we’re still friends, that’s pretty much the important thing.”

“Yeah, but...”

The racer was at a loss. How could Daxter be taking this so well? He had loved Tess so much, even when there hadn’t been a hope of him ever again being anything but an ottsel. Jak had been sure their relationship would be perfect, now that they could match up in either species. Hearing that Tess didn’t take his friend’s devotion seriously made him angry on Daxter’s behalf. He would be hard pressed to be friendly with her the next time they met.

“I’m still sorry.”

The redhead paused, then heaved a sigh. “Yeah, big guy... me too.” Flinging the used washcloth away he looped thin arms around Jak’s neck and laid his chin on the green-blonde’s soapy shoulder. Another sigh tickled the base of Jak’s ear.

Jak fidgeted, not knowing what to do with his hands. Daxter was draped full against his back, and… and now really wasn’t the time to be aroused by that. He wanted to try to comfort Dax somehow, but all be damned if he would hug him until they were both out of the water and, preferably, dressed. He hesitated, not sure what to do, until suddenly the redhead’s arms tightened.

“Then again...” Dax was so close Jak could almost feel his smile. Hot breath whispered in his ear. “You know what they say. When one door closes, maybe another’s about ta pop open an’ smack ya in the kisser.”

Jak wasn’t sure why, but a sudden chill ran down his spine. His flush intensified. “Y-yeah, that’s true. I’m, uh, I’m glad you’re thinking so positively about this, Dax.”

“What can I say? Ya can’t keep Orange Lightning down.”

//No, I can’t. I can’t even keep myself down.// Jak snickered at his own private joke as Daxter finally deigned to release his slippery hold and set about washing himself.

It was getting hot in there, in more ways than one. Properly washed or not, Jak was ready to leave the bath. The bubbles were fading, allowing the visibility to steadily grow, and he needed to negotiate a way out of the water that did not involve Daxter hanging all over him while he did it. Dax had always been a bit on the touchy, feely, grabby side, but Jak thought this was a little much.

Slowly, the racer reached for a towel he had earlier thrown to the side. If he could very quickly stand up and get it around him while the redhead was still occupied with scrubbing, he could make a clean getaway and be dressed before Daxter even got out of the tub. Minimal looksies all around.

Jak was at a loss, though, when Dax whisked the towel from his hand.

“Oh, thanks pal. It’s been nice, but I hate prunes an’ don’t wanna be one. So, ya gonna be much longer?”

Jak threw his head back so quickly his neck made a distinct popping sound, staring desperately at the ceiling as Daxter abruptly stood up. He winced as the throbbing in the suddenly twisted muscles traveled slowly but surely down to between his shoulder blades. “Uh, not too much longer, I guess.”

“Ya might wanna hurry. Yer lookin’ a little red in the face, there.”

//Don’t look down, don’t look down... it hurts but don’t look down...// Jak fidgeted at the obvious sound of water dripping off his unconcerned friend, anxiously drumming his fingers on the rim of the tub. //Just get out of here, you little twerp. I think I broke my neck.//

There was a swish of towel. Jak hazarded a quick glance and was rewarded with the sight of the towel slipping down around Daxter’s middle as the redhead stepped out of the tub. He had wrapped it twice and it was still too big to fit his tiny frame. Jak nearly smiled, until his companion made an annoyed sound and whipped off the offending fabric to dry his hair.

“Meep!”

Unaware that he had just made the most un-masculine sound of his life, Jak stared helplessly as Daxter industriously dried himself off. No matter how hard he tried to look away, his eyes seemed riveted to the towel as it traveled through his friend’s hair and down. //Look away, dammit, look away right now! Oh, shit, I can’t stop looking. My eyes are broken!//

Finally, Daxter finished drying and threw the towel over his shoulder. “Man, that’s better. Well, I’m gonna go hunt down somethin’ cold ta drink. It’s gettin’ kinda... *steamy* in here.” With one last shake of still-dripping hair the redhead strolled back to the bedroom, whistling innocently.

The door had barely snapped shut when Jak sprang forward, wrenched on the cold water tap and plunged his head beneath the icy stream. “Grrr, you sick bastard! Pervert! Voyeur! Sleaze! Get it together, you horny jackass!”

So absorbed was he in giving himself a piece of his mind that the racer failed to notice the slight echo of barely stifled laughter from the other room. As the freezing water did its best too cool his libido, he had to wonder. The situation couldn’t possibly get worse... could it?

- // - // - // - // -

Daxter was waiting, perched expectantly on the bed in a robe four sizes too large that he had swiped from the room’s spacious closet. Impatiently he toyed with the lid of Jak’s canteen, hoping the racer would get a move on so he could continue with his new favorite game: teasing Jak.

In the bath he’d had the green-blonde right where he wanted him, and was amazed at the reactions he’d gotten from his friend. The emotions he saw on Jak with most regularity were anger, frustration and, yep, more anger. Tonight, in the space of fifteen minutes the redhead had been able to coax shock, panic, concern, and lust.

The last one made Daxter a little proud this time, now that it didn’t sneak up and catch him by surprise. It even gave him a bit of that tingly feeling he was after, which in turn gave him hope. It might not be impossible for him to get aroused over Jak, not if the big guy kept responding like that and making him feel all special. And he did feel special, really. As far as Dax knew Jak didn’t get worked up like that over anyone else, so it was kind of an honor now that he thought about it.

“C’mon, Jakkie-boy, let’s move it along, here...”

Finally, after what seemed hours to the impatient redhead, the racer in question snuck out of the bathroom. Glancing from side to side as if he expected an ambush, Jak crept slowly out from behind the door. Dax was amused to note that he had a death grip on the towel around his waist.

“Forget somethin’, there?” He snickered at his friend’s state of undress and how uncomfortable he obviously was. “Sorry, I’d lend ya the robe, but then that’d leave me high an’ dry, wouldn’t it? It’s freezin’ in here.”

Giving Daxter a sour look, Jak headed for his bag. “I noticed. I assume you crammed my clothes back in here?”

“Nope, I kicked ‘em under the bed. Ya don’t really expect me ta pick up after you?”

“Dax!”

“Kidding!” The redhead pointed to the small pile of clothes and the bigger pile of belts and buckles stacked on the little table next to the bed. “See, I can be nice an’ helpful. Jeez, big guy, you really need ta loosen up. Weren’t ya supposed ta be relaxin’?”

Jak didn’t answer, merely grumbling as he sorted through the pile. Daxter cocked his head quizzically. Hmm. It looked like he needed to be quick and find another way to mess with Jak before the green-blonde got his composure back. What to do, what to do...

“Hey, Jak?”

“Hmm?”

“Sit down. I got an idea.”

- // - // - // - // -

To Be Continued...

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(2nd) AN: See there, nice long chapter to make up for last time. If I’d continued this last scene it would have been like, way longer. So I chopped it off at the good part and you get to wait until next time for it! Isn’t that fun?

I’ll try to hurry. I promise. ‘Til then, everyone!

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