The life of a Royal Bastard, Alistair

 

I may later add a chapter about the joining ceremony. For now, I wish to skip ahead to after the events of Ostagar.

 

Losing Duncan is slowly killing me. If Rose hadn’t woke up after we were saved by Flemeth, I think I may have broken. My depression had made it impossible for me to lead, but Rose seemed to understand my pain and took charge getting us out of the Wilds. I didn’t even mind then too much that we brought an apostate witch with us, which normally would have really gotten under my skin like a two ton splinter. I didn’t start talking again until we reached Lothering. Rose tried to get my mind off of it by asking me about myself that didn’t involve Duncan and taking some of the tasks put on the Chanters board. I must say killing giant spiders helps get your mind off most everything especially if it’s for money. We took in Leliana, who says she has visions from the Maker and Sten who was locked in a cage for killing a family. I was starting to think our crew couldn’t be any more motley. Yet, Rose invited them both and seemed to see something in them, a talent very like that of Duncan.  She has lost so much herself, but she keeps moving forward. I can now understand why Duncan recruited her. Right outside of the Chantry near the Chanters board, I noticed a rose was in bloom on this dead looking rosebush. The rose was blood red with a stem covered in thorns and a few leafs but so green. I plucked it while the others were not looking and put it in my travel satchel. I could feel in my blood the darkspawn were in high number and not far off, and for some reason I couldn’t leave it to be destroyed. Yeap, I am a pansy.  

                Currently, we are camped a day out of Lothering. No consensus had been made to where to go first amongst the party in trying to gather allies against the Blight. I had taken first watch, and now sleep was trying to claim me by the warmth of the fire.  Leliana came out of her tent, stretching like a cat.

“Alistair, why don’t you go to your tent and sleep? I can take watch from here. You look like you want to pass out. I am a night person anyway.” Leliana suggested.

“Yeah, if I was to count one sheep, I would fall asleep here laid over this log. Thank you Leliana.”

She smiled and walked over to the fire with her bow. I staggered towards my tent, when I heard a noise coming from Rose’s tent, a sobbing noise. I walked over and called out quietly, “Rose, um Rose are you ok?” Her mabari named Bucky responded to my voice, poked his head out and bit the calf of my boot and tugged, as if trying to get me to come in. Bucky then whined softly and went back in. I gradually lifted the flap of the tent, to be able to shut it quickly if needed. I don’t want to be considered a creeper.  Rose was in her bedroll, curled up and crying her eyes out.

“Rose, oh what is wrong?”

She didn’t respond right away, but looked up with tears in her eyes. I slowly walked in, slipping my chainmail off so as I had my linens on only and sat beside her. Running on complete intuition, I took Rose and held her to my chest. I took out the leather string holding her hair up, and started stroking her hair behind her back. She didn’t resist or say anything. I started to hum while she sobbed into my linen shirt, her fingers grasping it and her head snuggled to my chest. I continued to hum and stroke her hair, letting her get out all the pain she had been holding in. While I had been in a dark place with Duncan and the loss of the other Grey Wardens, she had helped me through while her own pain was pushed deeper. Frankly, she is so much stronger than me that way. She had held back her own loss of her home and family and lead us all out of Lothering, which we had heard from a traveling merchant had just been overrun with darkspawn.  For such a small thing, she is braver and stronger in spirit than most any warrior. Now it was my turn to help her out of the dark.  Slowly as I hummed, she stopped crying, letting go of my undershirt but snuggling her head up to under my chin with one arm wrapped around her.

“Alistair…thank you.” Rose murmured quietly into my chest.

“You’re welcome, dear lady.”

With Bucky wrapping around her feet, I leaned back on the tent pole and fell asleep holding her.