The greatest stories never told

 

On their merry frolic through the surface world, Link and Zelda learned many a great thing about the different species – such as…they were different…species…  Excellent subject matter.

 But Link had the question of how to stick his dick in things.

 To be fair to the hero, Link didn’t actually have the question.  For science.  Zelda had the question.  For science.  But as we know, anything Zelda says Link has, needs, or wants, he does.

 If Link were to spread his seed across the land, she postulated, then they could repopulate the world in fantastic ways.  Of course, Zelda’s version of “fantastic” differed from Link’s, but Link was not allowed an opinion here.

 Out of earshot of the Water Dragon, Zelda claimed that the parella were rather lame creatures and that Link should find a way to stick his dick inside them and create a new hybrid species.

 Link himself was rather unsure of this mission, but if Zelda desired it, then it would be so (he was that whipped and everyone on land and in sky knew about it).  So while Zelda distracted the Water Dragon, Link swam under water until he met a parella.  Without preamble, he located the first opening he could and stuck his dick into it.

 That weird sea creature was not amused and spit him out.

 Well, this was an obstacle.  His sword thrust did nothing!  How about a…sword…waggle……….no? 

 Left with no alternative, Link attacked with a well-aimed Skyward (dick) Strike.

 At first, nothing happened (as if it would), and Link sadly returned to Zelda with bad news.  The goddess reborn was displeased and ordered him to try again with different species until it was pleasurable to her.  However, some while later, the first of a remarkable species was hatched from an egg the parella lay…

 The Water Dragon named it a “Zora” and readied many a dickish thing for a future hero before disappearing out of embarrassment.

 Would this come back to haunt later generations?  …Nah.