Of Love and Culture

Chapter 2:
The Monster’s Eyes

Sai’s knees buckled under the weight of this new news. The monster with the eyes so hollow and starved, the man who had just moments before tried to kill him…was his mate…?

“I…do not…understand…” Sai’s trembling voice was so soft that he doubted Altrun had even heard him.

“I know that I have spoken a little to you about our clan, but I also know that I have been careful to leave a lot out.” Altrun said softly, reaching out to take Sai’s wrist in his hand and gently pull him to sit by his side on the ledge of the Moon Well, “That is, I meant to wait until I knew you were ready, when I could tell you about Bane. Perhaps I was hoping he would tell you himself, but right now he struggles so much to keep his sanity that I doubt he is capable of calmly telling you what you need to know.”

The poor little druid just stared into Altrun’s face in sheer confusion, a plea in his eyes that the man was not possibly being serious.

“Our clan is a collection of Druids, pure of blood. Our line is only passed on if the Mother so chooses. The entirety of those born into the clan dominant males, each generation is stronger and more attuned to Mother’s blessing than the last. For each male, Mother personally creates a mate best suited for them, one to help perfect the next line.”

“But I am male! As is he!” Sai cut the elder off, desperate to disprove his theory.

“That is not a bad thing. Nor is this the first time that this has happened. When Mother makes a male mate to a male of our clan, she imbues within them the ability to reproduce.”

“That is impossible!” Sai jumped to his feet and attempted to flee, but Altrun’s grip was steadfast on his wrist. Sai looked to him with panic, “I cannot reproduce. That is sick, that is not the Mother’s will! You worship a demon, you must!”

“Upon every female that is created there is a scent that they bare.” Altrun continued on powerfully, “One they carry from birth. To anyone else the scent is unnoticeable but to the one whom you are bound to the scent is undeniable. Normally the paths of two mates do not cross until they are both of sexual maturity to perform the acts of mating. Though there are unfortunate times, as with Bane, where the male crosses the female’s path prematurely. Normally this leads to rape, scorn and heartbreak but Bane hid himself from you. He remained silent and patient, the likes and strength of which I have never seen. Granted this has taken a toll on his sanity, you’re like a drug to him.”

“STOP IT!” All of this information was far too much for poor Sai to take. Confused and overwhelmed he shoved roughly at Altrun’s heavy body, powerful words uttered in his need to flee. His palm flashed softly and the elder druid wavered before slowly falling unconscious.

Sai turned and fled, too frightened and confused to focus enough to assume any of his animal forms. He runs hard and fast, and only when he reached the gates of Stormwind could he resume the shape of a feline once more.

---

I find a quiet spot in a secluded corner of the Cathedral to sit and meditate. It is here that I reside in silence, letting my mind go blank as I prepare myself for a proper meditation. Once my mind is clear and open, I have let go of my body, my thoughts. Even thoughts of my beautiful mate, the taste still lingering upon my lips. It was this that is the most difficult to clear my mind of, but when I do I feel the Mother’s hand lay gently upon my soul.

I confide in her all of myself. Everything by which I am. Mother’s light bathes me in its glory, in its peace, and puts my soul at ease. Time is lost here, in this purified space of white.

Once my meditation begins, I let Mother show me what she wishes. Our time alone is for her to praise me for the good, show me where I have gone wrong, and set me on a correct path towards my future. However, I do not remember the last time Mother praised me…the last time I felt her smile. This is a shame upon my soul and one by which is my fault alone.

My white space faces and gives way to form shape, color and presence. I stand in the middle of the Mage Quarter of Stormwind, watching a scene from so long ago. The day I had lashed out upon my brother for my Mate’s absence. I saw in full the injuries I did not take note of back then, the deep cuts and bites, the blood that stained his heavy ursine fur. I watch myself being restrained by the guards, struggling until the last moment where even the most feral part of me recognizes the futility of struggle.

You never forgave him.

I hang my head in shame. “I know.” I whisper, “But forgiveness is hard when…”

There is no need for an excuse, my Son. You have already told me. I hold my tongue at this and hang my head once more. You do not forgive your brother for taking away your mate, when he had his own. Your excuse was nothing more than jealous rage. You should not succumb to this, no matter how mortal your body may be.

Each word is hard to swallow.

The scene shifts to one more present. I now stand in the Park and watch myself wrestle my mate to the ground. With the haze of lust and need gone, lifted by Mother’s will to allow me to see so clearly I recognize it. What I had before seen as a sign of submission was merely a forfeit from fear. Sai held so much terror in his eyes as he looked upon me, and I have to admit that I was truly a horrendous sight. Not one of physical disgust but more of my actions.

I asked Altrun to free you from the temptations you had long been suffering in attempt to let your mind ease. Finally your mate returns to you and this…may have been your final mistake, Sai.

The realization sinks in and my hearts drops to my stomach. The bodily reaction I have breaks my meditation. The quiet Cathedral now drowns me in lonely silence as a cold sweat touches my flesh.

I must find Sai, but how to control myself? Too much of that scent too close would simply result in another disaster. But the fear… The fear I saw in Sai’s eyes returns to me and the shame and horror of my actions makes me too weak to stand. I sit there for many long moments struggling with myself, my Alpha is too feral to try and control. Yet, I know that for each second I struggle I give Sai time to solidify any insecurities about me he may have, and I am sure that he has more than plenty.

Still numb from shock and fear I find my feral form and stand on four clumsy feline legs. I race from the Cathedral, bounding back to the Park. The sight I am met with is not one that I find comforting.

Altrun lays unconscious in the grass beside the Moon Well and my little Sai is nowhere to be seen. Scenting the air, I can tell he has not been gone for too long and with this in mind I trot up to Altrun and nudge him with a paw, “Brother? Awaken my brother.” I take my elfin form and give his face a few firm taps to rouse him from his worryingly deep slumber.

Slowly the man comes to and groans softly, opening his eyes to stare up at me blankly. He blinks more for a second and begins to sit up, I can see that he is trying to regain his memory of whatever had done this. Was Sai in danger? Had he been taken?! I swear to Elune that I will never leave him alone for even a second. Already planning the castration of whatever new enemy has arisen I have almost forgotten my ailing brother. His groan brings me back to reality though, and I look to his face. “What happened!?” I snarl.

Altrun looks at me with confusion. “Its…a little hazy, brother… We were speaking, and he called you a…” he frowns but my urging look pulls the rest from his reluctant lips, “He called you a monster. I tried to explain who you were, who the clan was and he fled. He must have used a spell –“

I listen to no more. Already I fly into my feline form and race towards Sai’s scent. He believes me a monster? Does he truly hate me? Am I too late? His scent takes me to the Flight Master, and as I dash up to him I take my elfin form and give him a stern look, “A young Kal’dorei came through here, very small and petite, where did he fly to?”

The Flight Master gives me an intimidated look, “I-I can’t say. Confidenti-“

“WHERE!?” My Alpha rages under the surface, a growl reverberates through my chest and I flex my paws…hands…in frustration.

“Bane wait!” Altrun comes running up, panting some. Should he stand in my way I swear…

I remember what Mother had shown me, though, and my violent thoughts are curbed for the time being. I turn to face the other, growling and whimpering in the same breath. “I must find him.”

“If you seek him out now you will only reassure what he currently believes. You have to give him time to come to you. You have to let him calm down.”

I look to the Flight Master, then to Altrun and I simply want to collapse. Every fiber of my being, every ounce of me calls out for my mate, the scent of his maturity and just his presence after so long driving me to the very brink of my control. If you can call this control.

Altrun reaches out with gentle fingers and takes my shoulder, leading me away. I cannot protest. I have done enough damage already, yet even knowing this my feral side rages and fights against me.

He takes me to the docks, the salty air and open atmosphere helps to calm me down considerably. The ocean has always calmed me for some reason…

“Drink.” I look up and see Altrun holding a vial out to me of dark green content. I know what it is and what it does, and though the thought repulses me I reach out and dutifully take it. With one swallow the sickly sweet slime goes down and absorbs into my body.

The sedative works within minutes, and I begin to feel every muscle relax and my thoughts go fuzzy. Even my Alpha is affected, the beast calming down to a manageable level where I can more readily control him.

“I am relieved for you, Bane. Your mate has returned unharmed.” He sighs, “Then again, I cannot imagine the mental torture.

“Brother…” I murmur, silencing the man as I drunkenly wobble over and sit on a cargo crate, “I forgive you…for what happened. And I’m not just saying this because he has returned. It was something I needed to have said many years ago, but could not find the words for.”

Altrun stares at me for many long moments, or perhaps it was only seconds…perhaps it was hours. My mind does not seem to want to bother itself with time. I watch Altrun smile and approach me, hugging me tightly in his arms. “Thank you, Bane.” He rumbles, “That means more to me than you could ever imagine.”

I try for a smile but my brain decides that the effort is too much.

“Altrun…what am I to do?”

The younger rubs my knee comfortingly, his silence belaying his uncertainty. “He was frightened.”

“You said he called me a monster.”

“By all intents and purposes? You should be a monster by now. Bane, what you did was an incredible feat of will. I have seen many of our clansmen lose their minds in you types of situations.” Altrun is merely trying to console me, I know. He and I both know that soon enough there will be no restraint to my Alpha. The beast will take over and consume what shreds of my sanity remain. “Hold out just a little longer… He will come around.”

---

It was well past dark when Sai returned to Stormwind. He had spent a good portion of what was supposed to be a monumentally happy day huddled in Red Ridge, wondering when his demon was going to come and devour him. When the monster never came, the little Kal’dorei began his return to the city.

His biggest trouble on his mind was Altrun and his terrifying words. How could he be mated to a monster? How could Altrun not give him a choice in the matter? The confused little druid found himself wandering aimlessly around the dark and empty streets of the city, jumping at shadows with the fear of the man from earlier.

He crossed the bridge over the canal leading into Old Town, the sound of footsteps shifting with the change of the bricks, the scent of cold stone shifting to a more warm and familiar tone. He smiled at this, the wooden scent mingling with the scent of Tabitha’s warm pastries that he had so come to miss over the years.

The little Kal’Dorei looked around himself nervously, making sure that nobody was following him. Then again, it could be hard to tell with how many rogues were in the city. Little Sai had never thought about it before today, before he was attacked. How many could hide in the shadows. How many waited and shamelessly pined for him like the man, Bane did. Even he could hide in the shadows should he so desire, but he always found such acts to be sneaky and so dishonorable…

The door to Tabitha’s bakery squeaked a shrill sound as it opened. There was movement from behind the counter, the sweet smell of pastries soothing any immediate alarm Sai may have had as a tiny middle aged lady came out from around the counter.

“Sai?” the calm voice was full of disbelief and cheer. Tabitha was always wonderful to be around with lightly tanned skin, cherry red lips and the softest powder blue eyes. “Oh my goodness, the rumors are true!” She giggled and ran up to the elf, hugging her old friend tightly.

Sai hugged her back of course, smiling with elation. “Hey there. You haven’t changed a bit.”

The baker chuckled and stood back, propping her knuckles on her love handles, “Well you’ve changed a lot there Sai!” She then folded her arms over her chest, “Have you gone to see Altrun yet?”

Sai paused and then slowly nodded.

“He must have been so happy to see you. Poor dear has been quite lonely with only Bane to keep him company.” She shook her head slowly.

“What about his children?”

Tabitha hmmed for a second, then shook her head once more, “They’re here a lot, but they tend to disappear for long stretches, anywhere from a few weeks to a few months depending. Altrun is never gone for more than a few days.”

Sai didn’t know what to say, and the silence that encroached was growing awkward. “Here, I’ll get us some tea and cookies. You take a seat dear.” She ushered for the little elf to take his seat as she scurried behind the counter and clattered around with plates and pots and trays.

As the woman worked, Sai stared down at the table and fiddled with the scratches on the wood. “Miss Tabitha?” he asked. The clattering stopped for a moment, “What do you know about…an elf named Bane. You mentioned him a moment ago…”

The clattering resumed and it was a few minutes later that the woman reappeared with a nicely arranged tray. She set this down on the table and scuttled over to the door, flipping the ‘Open’ sign to closed and turning the lock with a solid ‘snick’. “Why don’t you start with what you know, Sai. I’m afraid I don’t know all that much on the matter.”

Said shook his head, “I know almost nothing. He attacked me earlier-“

“Attacked you!? Goodness I can’t believe he would do something like that.” She blinked, “Oh! I’m sorry dear, continue.” She hastily took her seat.

Sai quirked a brow and slowly resumed, “He…found me at the Blue Recluse… he chased me into the part and attacked me. Thankfully Altrun saved me, took Bane by the ears and ran him off… But then he turned around and tried to say that…well…Bane is my mate.”

There was a long silence that filled the room. Out of sheer politeness Sai took a cooling cup of tea and sipped it thoughtlessly. His mind flipped back to being pinned under Bane’s power, staring into those broken eyes. His muscles tensed and his heart squeezed tight in his chest. Fear rose up, but it was unlike any fear he had felt before.

“Like I said Sai, I don’t know much… I don’t know how much I’m allowed to tell you more specifically but I’m going to tell you what I know.”

Sai leaned forward and listened, hoping to hear some good news.

“Bane has always been…different. Over the years I’ve met many of the Druids from Altrun’s ‘Clan.’ I’m sure you’ve heard it mentioned at least. They’re truly the last of their kind and honestly quite amazing…deadly, yes, but amazing all the same.” She sighed and picked up her tea, “Many of them are shy of people, some of them too wild to adapt to city life. Druids of the wild, true Druids in my opinion. They are said to be gifted by Elune herself, each and every one of them and I believe it.”

“You’re getting a little long winded, Miss Tabitha…” Said interjected in a tiny voice.

She paused and looked up, a tight smile on her lips, “Right dear, I’m sorry. From what I understand, each member of this ‘Clan’ is given a mate. Someone chosen specifically and made entirely for them. I have seen this bond myself. As have you, if you remember Altrun and Senna. I was with Altrun the day he found Senna…” There was another long, painful pause in the room, “And I was there the day that Bane saw you.”

Sai winced.

“Altrun came to the city first. After he met Senna, all went well for a long while, but eventually I sensed unease in my old friend. He told me about his brother who neared a dangerous age to have no mate. Eventually Altrun brought Bane to the city and honestly I thought that he was liable to kill somebody. Spent all of his time curled up in shadows in the corner. Spent a lot of time in here as a matter of fact. He took a strange liking to my cinnamon rolls.” She sighed, her eyes distant as she lost herself in a memory, “I felt bad for the poor thing. Hardly ever left his feline form. His eyes were always so broken…so desperate. It’s painful to see the effect of having only half of a soul, really, and how it slowly corroded. Until…”

“Until…?” Sai prompted, not missing the sly little smirk on the baker’s lips.

“Until he saw you. In this very shop too! You wandered in here because of the scent one morning as I was giving Bane the day old cinnamon rolls. He got so very quiet, ducked into the shadows the second the door opened. But my dear, that was the first time I saw him smile. The first time I saw joy in that man’s eyes and I must say that he was the most proud creature in all of Azeroth at that moment.”

Sai shook his head slowly, “No, no Miss Tabitha, this is…this is not alright! Do you not see anything wrong with this!? E…Even Altrun, my closest friend, didn’t seem phased. He seemed to encourage it!” He felt a hopelessness sinking in his chest, “Please, tell me I’m not the crazy one here, he comes out of nowhere and I’m being told I’m supposed to be his mate!”

Tabitha frowned and stood, walking over to the boy’s side to rub his back and kneel down beside it. “Oh… Sai, I’m sorry. I guess…most of us are just used to seeing the mate of a clan member take this so easily. It’s usually a mutual connection. Altrun and Senna knew each other for less than two hours before they devoted themselves to one another.” She sighed, “I’m afraid I don’t know the whole science behind it, you would have to speak to Altrun…or better yet, Bane himself. I’m sure he would be happy to see you no matter what.”

“This doesn’t make any sense!” Poor Sai was losing hope in this situation.

The baker hmmed and smiled, “Now, weren’t you always one to believe in true love?” she asked, drawing the tiny Kal’Dorei’s attention back to her. “You admired the bond between Altrun and Senna. I know this seems…very strange, but of everyone who knew and understood…we were all hoping that you would be as happy as they were.”

Poor little Sai sighed and whimpered in the same breath.

She had a point.

---

Altrun stayed with me through the night. He helped me to a bed and let me rest. It is the first dreamless sleep that I have had since Sai’s appearance. I am not sure if I want another dreamless sleep though… The hollowness, the empty time that flashed before my eyes…it was disconcerting.

Before I can even register it, though, light hits my face and makes me recoil just slightly. Such unpleasantness brought on by the morning sun, I turn over to avoid its rays and let the fading serum give me back control over my body. The effects have weakened; my alpha has wakened with me and now growls just beneath the surface.

Once the serum fades completely I sit up and shake my head wearily.

“Good, you’re awake.” Altrun’s soft voice comes from an opened doorway a few feed away. My eyes struggle to focus. The man is chuckling as he approaches my bed. “You look like hell. he rumbles, patting the top of my head.

I am tempted to bite his hand.

As my senses return, I can scent something in the air. It is so faint, so distant and yet… “Sai…”

Altrun gives me a worried look. “Yes, brother. I received a message from him this morning.” he pulls something out of his pocket. A letter. The scent is there, on the paper. Perhaps I am beginning to worry myself with how obsessive I am.

I stare down at my feet blankly, wiggling my toes with mild amusement. “I will…” I want to say stay but the Alpha does not let the words escape my lips. I struggle with myself a moment and let the beast throw its tantrum. Such an act makes me ill and nervous, but the rage soon passes. “I shall stay.”

Altrun is watching me. I do not look up at him but I can feel his eyes down on me, examining me with a careful scrutinizing gaze, “That is not what you want.”

“It is what I must do for his safety.” The Alpha rages within me once more but I remain firm.

The younger is silent. He remains silent for many long breaths before he holds something out to me. A vial. The same vial he had given me last night, with the same green serum.

“Take only a sip.” He says.

“You saw what I did Altrun, why do you press this matter?” I push the hand away but he holds it out once more.

The man sighs. “Because hiding yourself from him will not change anything. He is your mate, Bane.”

---

Midmorning that day, Sai was curled up in the park. He had not slept well the night before, mostly due to so much going on in his head, some of it due to fear that Bane may show up.

Even now, the last thing he wanted to see was the feral looking druid from the day before. It had so much to do with those eyes. The pain, the desperation within them made Sai want to weep. He had no idea that anyone could ever exist with such pain in their eyes, especially when they were supposedly so joyous… But what really hit home for him was the fact that he was the source of that pain.

He heard the sound of approaching footsteps that drew his attention upwards. Altrun was approaching him with a solemn look in his golden eyes. A few feet behind him, though, was Bane. Something was different about the feral man Sai had met yesterday, and he found, oddly, that he could not deny the sense of worry that welled up in his chest.

Bane carried himself a little differently. His shoulders were slumped, his head was low, eyes staring blankly at the grass. He seemed so…lost.

“Don’t worry.” Sai’s attention snapped to Altrun at the sound of his Mentor’s deep voice, “I gave him a sedative to numb his senses and relax him. It’s completely harmless. It just ensures that he won’t do anything rash…”

The boy did not dare look back to the eldest druid, instead focusing on his mentor. “I…wanted to talk.” he said bluntly.

“Yes, the note you sent me specified as much.” the man teased, a tiny smile touching his lips.

Sai blushed just slightly at how stupid he must have sounded.

Although he returned his gaze to the elder druid once more. There was a delayed pause as the man realized he was being stared at and finally looked up. Their eyes met and Sai almost fell to his knees at the overwhelming sense of...need. Not as a mate would need their partner, but the need he felt when he saw a kicked kitten or a puppy with a broken leg. Although, somehow, this was far more tragic.

The eyes that had just yesterday frightened him into flight were now devoid of all fearsome attributes. The desperation and the hunger were gone from the yellow orbs and with those gone Sai got a full sight of the pain underneath.

He could not quite explain what happened next. Eyes still locked with the larger druid he slowly reached out and took to beast’s face with his hands with the same delicate touch he would use to hold a newborn baby bird. Those eyes shifted and the pain rippled some, dulled just slightly and Sai saw a hint of surprise. The boy felt as if he had no control of his actions although he knew if he truly wanted to stop he would.

Sai kneeled down and Bane followed. The boy leaned back against the Moon Well and folded his legs, having no fear as the man leaned forward and nuzzled against his chest.

“Rest.” The words were spoken by Sai’s lips much as how his body acted now, by complete instinct and need.

Bane slowly slipped his head down and all but collapsed into Sai’s lap, taking up the entirety of the space as his head pillowed itself on Sai’s thigh. A ripple ran down his spine as he watched the man slip away into unconsciousness with the most incredible look of peace on his face. Still allowing this instinctual rush, a finger reached down and gently caressed the surprisingly soft flesh of the Kal’dorei’s face.

This continued for a short moment. “You know…Senna did that to me once.” Altrun’s voice snapped Sai back to reality and he quickly realized what he had done. “It’s a form of hypnotism a female possesses over her mate. Used in times of high stress or distress to calm their partner.”

Sai blushed deeply, “H-He looked so helpless.”

The man nodded and moved to take a seat beside his younger companion. “What was it you wanted to talk about?”

Sai’s eyes slowly turned down and looked into Bane’s face once more. The silence between them told the youngest that his mentor understood.

“Very well Sai. What would you like to know?”

---

(( AN: OMG I LIVE! And no! I assure you that I have not lost interest in this story in the least. This chapter, I will admit, was extremely difficult to write for three reasons. One: This story had a lot of different directions that it could go, and this chapter was the pivoting role for me to decide which way to take it. Two: I rewrote this chapter seven times… Three: Cataclysm. Yeah… Please excuse grammar/spelling errors, yada yada. Oh! And Happy Holidays to all =D ))