Kinbaku-Bi {Beautiful Bondage}

“Good Roxas…Good…”

I really find myself enjoying the way his name slides off my tongue. I like it even more when he calls me ‘sir’ every time he addresses me.

I lean casually against the hallway leading to the lobby of my office and watch him curiously as he organizes a rather large stack of files that my previous assistant had made sure to dismember as he walked out only a few weeks before.

Demyx had nothing on Roxas. I lick my lower lip slowly as I examine his figure, sitting cross legged on the floor with neat piles of paperwork at his fingertips. His khaki slacks and white collared shirt give his skin a sun kissed appearance and his blonde hair sits wildly atop his head. It looks like feathers to me.

You would think I’d be strict about appearances but then that would be hypocritical of me as my hair seems to naturally defy gravity, resting just beneath my shoulders and tied back in an attempt to contain it. I brush the stray red strands from my face and find myself almost lost in studying his busywork.

“Roxas…” His name really does have a nice sound to it as I speak it aloud, hoping to get his attention.

He raises his perfect ocean pools to my gaze and I realize there is nothing more attractive than a beautiful man on the floor before me, staring up at me like that. “Yes Axel…sir?”

I smile at him casually. “I seem to have thrown away my notes on the Ansem case and I don’t have another copy….could you….”

“Go through the trash?” He practically reads my mind.

My smile takes on a more wicked appearance as I nod slowly and turn to walk back into my office. I waltz to the window and to my surprise, Roxas is climbing awkwardly into the dumpster behind the building. My mouth drops open slightly. Did I just moan a little out loud?

I tilt my head slightly, watching as he rips through bags of disgusting garbage from the restaurant next door, fumbling with the black bags to find my notes. I almost can’t believe he is doing this…for me.

I begin to feel a familiar heat creeping over my body and I quickly rush from the window, over to my orchid garden. I have to distract myself. Turning on the mist to douse the fire burning inside me seems to be the wisest choice. I stare down at my garden and think to myself how Roxas is as intriguing as the orchids themselves. I wonder if he bruises as easily.

Shaking my head, I walk back to my desk and take out a stack of papers from the drawer. I slip on a pair of small black glasses, resting them mid-way down the bridge of my nose, and begin reading over them thoughtfully.

I look up from my readings to find Roxas standing in the doorway, panting a little from his dumpster dive. The sight of him causes my glasses to slip a little further down my nose.

His face is tinted pink from the outside heat and his hair seems a bit more tousled than usual. A streak of Gods knows what dirties his cheek and a corner of his shirt has become loosened from his pants. The sight of him is rather hot actually.

He approaches me slowly and brushes off the papers before proudly handing them to me. I look up at his eager face and then down at the filthy papers clutched in his hands.

“Oh don’t worry about it…I found another copy.” I flash him a toothy grin and look back down at my papers.

His eyes widen slightly as he dumps the papers into the trash can. Surprisingly enough, he doesn’t seem mad. He just stands there. I can feel him watching me closely and wicked thoughts send shivers down my spine. I turn my gaze to him and before I can dismiss him, the phone rings.

“Here, I need 6 copies of this and my coffee needs more sugar.” I speak to him flatly, trying to maintain my professional demeanor as I watch him struggle with the sudden list of tasks.

He quickly snatches the papers from my hand, scoops up my coffee and rushes from the room, slightly flustered. I enjoy the sight of him squirming and I attempt to return my attention to my work. It becomes much easier once the phone finally stops ringing.

I hear the door open and close outside in the lobby. My office is not terribly large so I can hear what goes on outside without leaving my chair really.

Suddenly, I hear a voice that sends a wave of anxiety through me. I swallow hard and my eyes widen.

“AXEL!!!”

It’s Riku…

Panic sets itself inside of me and I jump from my desk, knocking my chair over and I pace around the room fearfully, trying to find a place to hide in case Roxas is too busy to keep him at bay.

“Submissive…”

His voice is velvet smooth and laced with cruelty as he speaks to Roxas. I can’t rescue him though. I’m not entirely sure what Riku would do to me if he saw me right now. I shudder and wedge myself inside a nearby closet, hoping to Gods Roxas doesn’t send him in.

My eyes widen against the darkness as I hear the door open and close. I swallow uncomfortably and attempt to push myself harder against the items in the closet.

“Axel…sir?…Axel?”

I sigh with desperate relief at the sound of Roxas’ soft voice as he looks for me.

“In…in here…” I whisper, hoping he can hear me.

“Axel?” He questions again. I look down and can see the shadows of his shoes at the bottom of the door.

“I’m not here…”

“Oh….Ok…” He whispers back and the shadows disappear from the bottom of the door.

I continue to stand fearfully in the darkness, feeling quite stupid by now that I am hiding from somebody. However, I don’t think Roxas really knows who that somebody is and that I have every reason in the world to be locking myself in closets right now.

A few minutes later, the entire office becomes eerily quiet. The irrational part of me thinks that maybe Riku dragged Roxas away, stuffing a gag into his mouth as he tosses him over his shoulder. That’s the irrational part of me. Riku would have slapped him clear across his face and tied him up right there in the lobby as a present for me to deal with.

I slowly crack open the door and sigh with relief at the emptiness of my office. Creeping to the door, I hold my breath as I exit into the hallway towards the lobby to check on my poor assistant.

To my utter surprise, Roxas is sitting at his small desk and appears to be concentrating on something. The flick of a lighter catches my attention more closely and I realize he is heating up a small metal rod. My first instinct is to immediately stop him from whatever he is doing but my curiosity gets the better of me as I watch him then press the hot metal rod to his forearm. My ears are invaded with the sound of a whimpering gasp escaping his lips as his skin singes away slightly from the contact.

I inhale sharply from the sight, never taking my eyes off of him. Apparently, he heard me and slowly raises his tear brimmed stare to my gawking figure. His eyes widen and he quickly shoves everything into a small red velvet bag, pretending he never saw me, avoiding my stare.

I tear my attention away from him momentarily to find my jacket on the floor by the door. I wrinkle my nose in disgust as I notice that there are muddy boot prints all over my black coat, obviously a message from Riku. I shudder in response and refuse to pick it up as I turn and quickly retreat to my office.

Thoughts of Riku immediately clear my mind as I think to myself, What was Roxas doing? It never really occurred to me that the burns on his arms I noticed when I interviewed him were self inflicted. This upsets me and I conclude, that is going to stop!

The rest of the day proceeds awkwardly and I stare intently at the clock, just waiting for the moment that I can lock the doors and drown myself in a bottle of sake.

Today has been too much but at least I have maintained control throughout. This makes me proud and I decide to call Roxas into my office as he is about to go home.

A few moments later, he peeks through the door and enters nervously. I can feel his tension. I smile at him genuinely, hoping to sooth whatever may be causing his discomfort.

I sit myself down on a nearby couch and gaze at him thoughtfully.

“Come here…Roxas….sit.” I pat the seat next to me and eye him carefully as he reluctantly approaches me and accepts my offer.

“Are you shy?” I ask him seriously. I can see the obvious answer shining in his eyes but he only blushes and looks at me.

“I’m shy…” I finally admit. No matter how much control and power I seem to have, it really is true, deep down inside.

I cock an eyebrow as he scoffs. “You’re not shy…you’re a lawyer.”

I chuckle amusingly. “I’m shy…I just…overcome my shyness in order to…get things done….ya know?”

He joins in my soft laughter and looks away.

“Look Roxas, I’m going to be straight forward with you. I know I’m your employer and it requires…that we maintain a professional…relationship…but I want you to feel free to talk to me if you need to.”

“Uh…Oh…” He stammers, swallowing hard and staring deeply into my eyes like a frightened child.

I sigh and decide I’m just going to be blunt. “What is going on with the lighter and the burning?”

I watch him with genuine concern as he quickly covers parts of his arms with his hands, attempting to hide what I already know is there.

“Roxas?”

He swallows hard and bites his lip. “I uh…feel…”

“Is it that sometimes the pain inside has to come to the surface and when you see physical evidence of the pain inside…you feel like you’re really…here?”

His mouth gapes open slightly.

“It’s comforting…isn’t it?” I clear my throat against my own words, almost feeling like I’m revealing a bit too much of my own self to him…but this isn’t about me. It’s about him.

“I…guess that’s a way to put it…” His voice is meek and shy.

I know inside that he is secretly too strong for this and I decide, it’s time for me to take control of this situation fully now.

“Look, I’m going to tell you something…are you listening?”

He nods in response, gazing at me admiringly. I can see his nervousness actually melting away a little as I speak to him with confidence.

“You will never…ever…burn yourself again….am I perfectly clear?…it’s in the past…you’re over that…. Right now.”

He stares me in shock but he almost seems relieved at my ordering him to stop something that has probably become a painful routine for him his whole life.

“Do you understand?”

He suddenly smiles at me. “Yes sir…”

“I want you…to leave work early today. You require…relief and I want you to enjoy a nice walk home.”

A blush paints his perfect cheeks and he nods. He really is beautiful now. I decide from this moment on, things are going to be different. I lean over and grab my camera from the table next to the couch. I hold it up and point my focus to his angelic face.

He shakes his head and laughs at me as I take the picture. I motion for him to get up, get out and enjoy the rest of his day as I myself rise from my seat. Watching him leave, I then stare down at the developing Polaroid, admiring his features slowly coming through the gray haze.

I walk over and place the picture of him amidst my orchid garden. I feel something inside of me growing…a sort of intimate tendril creeping from one of my darker areas, nursed on the feeling that I had discovered something about myself…and Roxas.

To Be Continued...