The Original Sin: Bishop Sasarai's Confession

Part I
Chapter 2

The following morning, Sasarai repeated his cleaning ritual, then quickly ate his breakfast. He felt a little apprehensive abretureturning to perform his duty, but had thought the situation over extensively the night before, and decided against bringing it up to Father Hikusaak. After all, it may have only been a youngster playing pranks; the voice had sounded light and youthful. The episode would most likely not be repeated.


Still trying to concentrate on these comforting thoughts, Sasarai returned to his seat in the box and waited. Before long he had a visitor, and the long day of prayer and forgiveness began. He heard some disturbing things, but most were of a usually sinful nature, nothing he hadn't heard before. And, sooner than he realized, the time was up and he was free again to take his rest.


Or so he thought. But someone stopped him, just as before.


"Where are you off to, now?" a familiar voice said.


Sasarai froze. Was it fear he felt? But who would dare touch one of the Bishops?


"I don't know what sort of game you're playing," Sasarai said harshly, "but I will not allow you to offend this sanctuary."


"I'm not `offending this sanctuary;' I'm here to confess."


"You will not desecrate the house of God!"


"I told you that I don't believe in God. Now will you hear my sins, Father?"


"Enough!" Sasarai spat. This was no child; this was a sick mind with foul intentions. He turned and began to stride away.


".I'm sorry."


Some strange new softness in the Voice made Sasarai stop, turn back.


"Sometimes. sometimes my mouth leaps ahead of me. More often than not, I'd say," it continued. "I try to think before I say these things, honestly I do, Father; it's just that usually my mouth is much quicker than my head. I really am here to confess a sin."


"A sin, you say? Only one? And is this it, this profane mouth of yours?"


"...That is not my sin."


There was silence for some moments, and Sasarai spent the time debating whether he should leave, or perhaps stay to hear the madman's story. If he wasn't a believer, why should he wish to confess? He may really be mad. Or maybe he's trying to find the path to God. Either way, Sasarai felt it his duty as a Holy Harmonian priest to try to help the man. He climbed into the confession box, pulled the curtain, and opened the window.

"First, let us pray together," Sasarai began.

"I don't know how to pray."


".You-you don't know how to pray?"


"I've told you before; I'm not a religious man, Father."


The young man across the obscured screen intrigued Sasarai, and confused him. What would induce a non-believer to come to confession, in a church, if he didn't even know how to pray???

"I--I'm confused. I'm not exactly sure why you're here."


"I've come to confess."


"Yes, yes--you've told me this much. But normally when one confesses, the purpose is to admit to sin and ask for forgiveness."


"I'm prepared to admit to my sin; that is why I came here. But I don't want forgiveness."


"My son, you're missing the point entirely."


"My point is to confess."


"But the purpose is to obtain forgiveness and repent!" Sasarai cried out in frustration. "Why don't you want forgiveness?"


"There's nothing to forgive."


Sasarai removed his glasses and rubbed at his eyes. This man was truly troubled, or stark raving mad. The Bishop ran his hand through his long russet hair and replaced his glasses.


"So?" the Voice pressed. "May I confess?"


Sasarai gave a short, exasperated laugh. "Yes!" he cried in frustration. "Yes! By all means; now that you're here you should accomplish your mission." And then stay away from this place.


The man paused to give Sasarai a moment to settle before he continued. "An impure thought is the same as an impure action, don't you think? Why, even as I sit here, separated from you by only a shaded screen, my mind is wandering into unclean thoughts."


"And this is your sin? An unclean mind to match your unclean mouth?"


"That's not my sin; that's what I call personality."


Sasarai's heart began to pound in his chest, the sound thundering in his ears as he asked, "Then what, my son, is this great sin you harbor?"


There was another pause and a shift of movement through the small panel. Sasarai felt the presence of the other as he leaned forward, caught the faint gleam of white from the stranger's eyes through the screen. The voice came through so softly he had to strain to hear it. "I love you."