Woman without a Country

"I don't even know where to start," muttered Canderous as the shuttle headed towards Dxun.
"About what?" asked Ludmilla innocently.
"Your boytoy's age, or the fact that he's a Jetii."
"My boytoy is older than your little face decoration, and she was a Sith!"
Canderous chuckled. "She got better, thank you for that. And your boytoy looks younger. Is that on purpose?"
"He's spent a lot of time in space. Ran away from home, mixed with bad kids, you know."
"And the Jetii part?"
"Oh, I taught him that."
Canderous was silent.
"What?"
"No, seriously, I don't even know where to start. You can't just go around teaching kids to be Jetii."
"Yes, I can." She looked at the Mandalore calmly. "I'm a Knight, and even though I was exiled and cut off from the Force, my status was never revoked. There's nothing in the Code or the laws of the Republic to stop me from teaching."
"Yeah, but… wait, you were cut off from the Force? It didn't stick."
Ludmilla shrugged. "What can I say? Every time I think the Jedi Council has hit bottom for incompetence and stupid decisions, they keep digging."
"So, let me get this straight. Some old woman, who walked away from the Jedi Order during the wars, finds you and rescues you. Then you find and rescue some kid who turns out to be an untrained Jetii, and train him. Then some Siit Lord sends his Shadow Hand to kill you, and you save her, turn her away from the Dark Side, and train her."
Ludmilla nodded. "Sounds about right. What about it?"
"Does this sort of thing happen to you a lot?"
"You make it sound so unusual, but really, what was I supposed to do? Send her back to be killed for failing? Leave Atton to die, or worse, fall to the Dark Side?"
"It's just that last week, there were no Jetii in this sector. Now there are four. Possibly five, if you count that di'kutla councilor that you say is supposed to be hiding on Onderon."
Ludmilla snickered. "Kavar." She couldn't keep the scorn from her voice as she said his name.
"I'm a Jedi Knight, but I'm going to let my student run a war for me," said Canderous mockingly in a fake voice, clearly meant to be imitating Kavar. "I sure hope someone will win, so I can take all the glory!"
Ludmilla burst out laughing, and couldn’t answer. "He wasn't that bad."
"He wasn't that good, either." Canderous landed the shuttle at the far end of the spaceport. "You know, we all expected that Kavar would be the one leading the Republic forces against us. Someone famous, respected, traditional. No one expected some nobody from nowhere to appear at the head of an army, and kick our asses back to the Far Rim."
She smiled at the memory. "Revan only seemed to come from nowhere. She would sit quietly on the sidelines, and watch and study and learn. And when you least expected it, she had solved the problem, and all the problems her solution had caused. Her only problem was getting people to listen to her."
"Is that why she adopted the mask and let everyone think she was a man?"
Ludmilla nodded. "She was tiny," she held out her hand to show how Revan's height. "Have you ever seen those expensive little ceramic dolls they sell on Coruscant for the little Senatorial daughters to play with?"
Canderous chuckled. "Yeah, that wouldn't have made a very inspiring leader for the Republic troops." Canderous held out his hand as if he were holding an imaginary doll. "Come, my troops, follow me to Candyplanet!" he said in a mocking falsetto. Then, he made cheering gestures with his other hand, "Yes, Fairy Princess General Revan! We will follow you anywhere!"
Ludmilla burst out laughing. "You're a strange man, Mandalore."
"What, just because I have a sense of humor and a vivid imagination?" he grinned. "Come on, let's explore Onderon." He looked critically at her. "Usually, I try to bring someone who isn't so Mand'ori to do all the talking. For some reason, the people of Onderon hold a grudge."
"Probably because you beat them into the ground."
Canderous grinned. "We respect our victorious enemies. Why can't everyone take a lesson from us?"
"Probably because you beat them into the ground," she repeated, and Canderous laughed.
"Oh, the little whiners deserved it. Anyway, they're going to assume we're both Mandalorians and give us a hard time. Just so you know."
"Halt, off-worlder," demanded one of the guards of the Onderon spaceport. "You'll need to answer a few questions before we permit you to enter the city." The guard looked at the very tall, muscular woman, and the equally tall, muscular man behind her. "You'll also need to provide some identification," he said suspiciously.
Ludmilla sighed. "No, I don't think we will need to provide any identification."
The guard stared blankly at her. "Actually, you're right. You don't need to provide any identification."
"And we don't have to answer any questions," she said calmly.
"No," said the guard, slightly befuddled by her use of the Force, "you don't need to answer any questions."
The Mandalore chuckled. "While you're at it, why don't you convince him he never saw us? It will save us some trouble later."
Ludmilla shook her head in mock despair.
"In fact," said the guard in confusion, "I have no idea why I'm bothering you instead of going to the local bakery to get myself some cintapaste buns."
Canderous looked at her as the guard recited the address and menu of the local bakery. "Wait," he said suddenly, "go over that part with the curry buns again."
The guard, still under the influence of Ludmilla's Force persuasion, recited the savory section of the menu once more.
"Okay," commanded Canderous, "give us our visas so we can hit that bakery. Now I'm hungry."

Atton sat up, not sure why he was awake.
"Is everything all right?" Visas asked softly.
"Yeah, it's just…" Atton touched his lips, and could smell her perfume on his clothes. "Was Ludmilla here?"
"She has not been here for a few hours. She kissed you and then left for Onderon."
"How did I sleep through that?" Atton asked himself, then looked around the room again. "So, is she back yet?"
"That, I do not know," said Visas gently. "I don't think so, I'm sure she would come here first if – "
The door opened and Ludmilla bounced in, happily. "You're awake!" she pounced on Atton, and they fell back to the bed, locked in a kiss.
"Oh, she is back," Visas stood, and turned to leave the room, but ran into Canderous, who was pulling off his armor.
"Well, hello there," grinned Canderous. "Would you like some chocolate?" he asked as he drew Visas away.
"I have a terribly important question," said Ludmilla as she pulled away and let Atton breathe. "Can you make these?" She handed him a bag, and he pulled out a sweet, sticky pastry and ate it experimentally.
"Sure," he smiled as he ate the cintapaste bun. "And the honey version, too. Ack," he stared at his hand, now covered in sugary syrup.
"Oh," said Ludmilla innocently, "let me get that for you."
Atton made a surprised little noise as Ludmilla licked all the syrup from his fingers. He whimpered softly as her tongue explored his hand, ran over his fingers, and she carefully kissed his wrists before letting his hands go, then proceeded to kiss his face, licking away all the traces of pastry and its fillings.
"What are you doing?" Kreia demanded. "Can you keep your hands from the boy long enough to tell us what happened on Onderon?"
"It's not her hands that you should be worrying about," grinned Atton, and kissed Ludmilla again.
"Stop that!" snapped Kreia.
"We got thrown off the planet!" said Ludmilla. "I got to talk to Kavar for about five minutes before General Vaklu's men attacked. He's the local Sith lackey, wants to take over the planet and oust the Queen. Colonel Tobin, the guy who shot at us when we approached the spaceport, is his personal kath hound. They're blaming the Republic for that fight, and pretty much anything else bad that happens on Onderon. Vaklu wants to secede completely from the Republic."
"How did you get thrown off the planet?"
"Well," said Ludmilla, carefully choosing her words, "we were trying to keep a low profile."
"You and the Mandalorian. Really." Kreia's disbelief was almost palpable, and Atton snickered a little.
"Oh, you be quiet. We were doing a pretty good job."
"Until?" Kreia snapped. "Out with it, girl."
"You know, if you were so interested in talking to Kavar, why didn't you come to Onderon?"
"I hate palaces," Kreia sniffed. "They're always so cold."
"We never even got to the palace," Ludmilla snapped in frustration. "That's it, when we go back to Onderon, you're all coming with me. And if there's a dance in the ballroom, you're all going."
"I don't think so," said Kreia sharply.
"In heels!"
"I don't have anything to wear," said Atton innocently. "My shoes sank."
"Quiet, fool," said Kreia. "And when will you be going back to Onderon?"
"I don't know," Ludmilla sighed, "Kavar said he would contact me. I'm pretty sure he made it out of the cantina alive."
"Why is this even a question?" asked Kreia sternly. "What were you doing in a cantina that would put a Jedi Master's life at risk?"
"Okay, that's it. We're leaving Onderon, Dxun, whatever, we're going somewhere else. Kavar knows where to reach me, not that it matters, since everyone in the galaxy knows where to find me at all times."
Kreia sighed impatiently. "Very well, if you are going to abandon Onderon – "
"Kavar doesn't want to start a civil war on Onderon, he's working with the Queen, and Vaklu is working with a Sith Lord. An incredibly incompetent Sith Lord, I might add."
"Agreed," said Kreia. "Where shall we go then, while we are waiting for Kavar to figure out how to put his pants on?"
Atton snickered quietly before he could stop himself, and hid behind Ludmilla when Kreia glared at him.
"What's left on the list? Dantooine? Let's go to Dantooine so Master Vrook can yell and get it all out of his system. And then we can go to Korriban. Maybe Kavar will have made a plan by then."
"Doubt it," grinned Atton, "unless waiting for you to save him counts as a plan."
Kreia smiled. "Come, if we are leaving, we should be on our way. We have dallied here far too long."
"Fine, fine," grumbled Ludmilla. "I'm taking a keg or two, though. I don't care what anybody says." She pulled Atton to his feet. "Come on, let's get ready to leave so everyone," she glared at Kreia, "can stop yelling at me for stuff that isn't my fault."
Kreia shook her head and left the room. Canderous and Visas were kissing in the hallway. "Enough, seer. We must return to the ship and be on our way as soon as possible." Knowing that Visas couldn't see her, she glared significantly at the Mandalore. "So the crew should get ready to leave this miserable vine-infested moon."
Canderous looked at Visas, then at Kreia questioningly. Visas pulled away with a sad sigh, and walked away. Kreia gently motioned to him to follow. Canderous pointed at himself in confusion, and shrugged. Kreia pointed again, more forcefully this time.
Ludmilla walked out of the room, with Atton's hand in hers and glowing with happiness. "Hello, Mandalore. I guess we'll be leaving now."
"Er… about that…" said Canderous slowly. "You run into trouble a lot. I'm sure you could use an extra blaster, and I wouldn't mind collecting some of those clanless Mandalorians you've run into on your travels."
"Or, possibly, the idea of going an entire Standard hour without locking lips with Visas is just intolerable to you," said Atton.
"Oh, you should talk," growled Canderous. "I was thinking of making you a stuffed Jedi Exile doll for those ten minutes a day when she's not touching you."
"Could you?" asked Atton brightly. "I'd love one!"
Canderous turned to Kreia. "Is he always like this?"
"Only when he's conscious," answered Kreia sharply.
"Good point," grinned Canderous.
Atton hid behind Ludmilla, and put his arms around her waist.
"You're welcome to come with us, Mandalore, and I appreciate the offer."
Kreia made a small noise of irritation, but no other protest, and Ludmilla rolled her eyes.
"Well, let me go make sure the camp will survive without Atton's cooking," Canderous grinned. "And I'll get my weapons."
"Tell them we'll be back," Ludmilla smiled. "Oh, and be sure to get a few kegs for the ship."
"Wouldn't travel without them." Canderous ran off.
"Who wants to bet he'll run into his weapons before Visas? No one? Didn’t think so," Atton sighed, and rested his head against Ludmilla's shoulders.
The Mandalorians helped them carry their gear and some supplies back to the Ebon Hawk. Visas tried her best not to look overjoyed that Canderous was coming with them, and Ludmilla tried not to be overjoyed at the three kegs of thick, black Mandalorian ale.
"Don't worry," Ludmilla said as they finished loading. "We'll be back."
"Well, it's not like you can return to Onderon anytime soon," said one of the Mandalorians seriously. "Vaklu's got a lot of power."
"And even you can't defeat his entire army by yourself," said another.
Ludmilla grinned. "I'm not planning to," she tossed down the last load. "What do you think I recruited all these people for?"