Chapter Two: Maturing
Duncan stood before her, his arms crossed. "I assure you I am the farthest thing from a suitor for the teyrn's daughter. As for being escorted... I could say the same thing about you. A lone guard practicing battle tactics in the morning? It seems unlikely."
She sheathed her weapons carefully and removed her helm. Loose strands of hair broke free from their prison and dangled messily in the wind. Some clung to her face, sticky with sweat. The breeze felt wonderful on her throbbing heated skin She held her helm beneath her armpit as she stepped towards Duncan.
"I have heard much of the Grey Wardens of Old, though I have never seen one in Ferelden before... Well, not since the banishing... Which would be before I was born anyway... So I've never seen one... I really don't know much about your order unfortunately, other than darkspawn and saving the world from it... Um... I
thinkI should have just said that from the beginning. Sorry, I tend to babble sometimes," Krista apologized in a demure tone.
Duncan only smiled at her in a kind way, looking as though he were recalling something precious. "It's all right. You are not the first I have heard go on like this."
She felt her face grow hot, knowing that this man thought her to be a fool. "Well, anyway, the truth is I'm not actually a guard. My name is Krista and it is an honor to meet you Duncan." She held out her hand and found herself relieved when he shook it. Perhaps he did not think her to be a
complete fool. "Do you have business with Teyrn Bryce Cousland? He is my father."
His eyes went wide for a moment in awe. "Then you are... My Lady Cousland it is a pleasure to meet you." He bowed slightly in a calm and enchanting voice. It was very formal.
"There's no need for that, Duncan. I am just Krista." She smiled cordially as he straightened his posture. She despised that everyone had to address her as a proper lady. Formalities were so annoying.
"Thank you for your kindness. However, I am indeed looking for your father. I had heard that he might have some promising potential recruits. I have never met the teyrn though I was hoping he could part with one of his warriors to help defend against the Blight." Duncan seemed pensive.
"Well, I know he is sending most of his men off to Ostagar tonight," she responded with a raised eyebrow. She was trying to think carefully so she would not give him the wrong information. "He and my brother, Fergus, will be leading the troops into battle," she clarified emptily as she put her helm back on. She turned to one of the nearby dummies and struck it with her fist. "I guess you can take your pick from the handful left behind..."
"That is wonderful news. We were beginning to worry that no reinforcements would arrive in time. King Cailan will be happy to see the Highever army so soon." He sounded delighted by the news but Krista did not look back to see his expression. "Although, you seem distressed by this..."
She sighed. "I want to help. My skills would be useful but I doubt my father will see any wisdom in that. He's going to tell me to stay here, no doubt. He has always protected me from fighting, though that is all I have practiced since I was able to pick up a sword."
"I'm sure the teyrn has his reasons," he replied. "You and your family are nobility. The teyrn has only two children, correct? And you are his only daughter, are you not? It seems logical that he would want to shelter you from a life of bloodshed."
She groaned, turning to face Duncan. "But I don't need to be sheltered. Yes, it is true that I am his only daughter, but I am far from the proper, well-mannered one he may have wanted. I possess the skills of a warrior, the mannerisms of a boy and the stubborn thought of an ox, or so mother says." She shrugged. "The truth of it is I don't wear dresses or find fancy dinner parties riveting. I'm far from diplomatic and I couldn't succeed at lying if my life depended on it. I guess... I'm just bad with words. That's why I'm told to keep my mouth shut everywhere I go, especially at those parties we're expected to attend. Everyone there always seems so... fake. Mother scolds me for chasing away almost all of my suitors, claiming I should be betrothed at my age, while I am still young enough to be considered by any man." She stuttered a small nervous laugh, though she did not smile inside that helm of hers. She knew she should not be discussing this but could not stop herself.
"But to be completely honest, I would like to just let things happen naturally than try to force some sort of false or even flimsy connection. But... it seems I'm rambling again. I'm so sorry. You don't want to hear about my dull problems. I'm sure I'm just being...
difficult again. I wouldn't be surprised because I'm always told that's what I am... Er... Boy, I just don't know when to keep my mouth shut do I? I'm sorry. Please, allow me to escort you to my father."
Duncan chuckled quietly. "There is more wisdom in your words than you might think, Krista. Your thoughts of meeting genuine people are admirable. However, people often disguise their true intentions behind lies and it seems that you may have already learned that. Your difficulty with words may dissipate with time and repeated exposure. The inability to lie and deceive is an admirable trait to possess indeed, as much as you might think it to be a curse. Your family might say you are difficult, stubborn and even foolish, but you must never loose sight of what you believe to be right. Ah, but I digress. My duty is to remain as neutral as possible in all affairs... My only opinion is that the Blight must be stopped. Such is the job of a Grey Warden. Now..." He cleared his throat, and moved the conversation forward. "Thank you, an escort to the teyrn would be most appreciated. Your castle is rather large. I would not want to get lost."
Krista was about to thank Duncan for his supportive opinions when a familiar voice rang out from behind her. She turned to face him slowly, almost painfully.
"I'll do that if you don't mind." Fergus's tone was smug.
"How long have you been standing there?" she asked, afraid he had heard what she said about finding a genuine connection with a man. She had always told him no man was strong enough to handle her, which was true enough of the men she had encountered in the past, but she did not ever tell him that she wanted something so sentimental. It was humiliating and she never talked about it. She supposed it was easier to talk to a complete stranger because he was detached from the situations she spoke of entirely.
"I may have been standing behind the wall listening to your most embarrassing admittances,
dear sister.Though they hardly come as a surprise," he replied with a sly grin. "Father told me he received word this morning that a Grey Warden was on his way. I was sent to keep an eye out for him, one of my last duties here at the castle." He chuckled. "But I see he's already here. Let me take care of it. Mother has been looking for you Kris, says something about needing you to look presentable today- and before you protest, I'm just the messenger. I suggest you get your big butt over to her if you want to argue about it. You might want to argue about getting some new armor while you're at it. You've gotten a little big for your britches, haven't you?"
Krista crinkled her nose at him as she removed her helmet. He always teased her about her insecurities. Even though he was leaving, he would not make today feel any different. It was his way of telling her he would never be gone, she supposed.
"At least I can fill my britches," she whispered to herself.
"I'm sorry, what was that?" Fergus asked mischievously.
"You better get to father then, Fergus. This is the Grey Warden Duncan," she retorted calmly as she waved an arm in a presenting fashion. "Try to get him there in one piece, will you?"
"Ha, ha. Very funny, sis."
She strolled away wondering who would be leaving with Duncan to join his order of heroes. She wondered if maybe she would know the soldier chosen. She heard her brother making light conversation with Duncan, laughing as though nothing was going to change tonight. He was always good at putting on a strong front. Krista wished she could be like that. For the most part, she was. It was just the big things that scared her, like death and blood. Fergus had always teased her about how she wanted to be a warrior when she could not even stomach the sight of blood or the thought of loved ones dying. Part of being a fierce warrior was being strong emotionally, not just physically; it was about not letting anything affect you when people look to you for guidance and strength.
She thought maybe her father was right after all in his efforts to keep her out of battle, but how was she to overcome her fears if she did not get put into situations that caused her to face them? Granted, she was terrified of losing Fergus or her father in the coming battle; the thought had already made her cry deeply on more than one occasion. The only time anyone had seen her, it had been Fergus and it happened to be the day he had told her he was leaving for Ostagar. His death was the first thing to jump into her head. She had fallen to her knees and cried in his arms like a weak little girl. He had not chastised her or made fun of her. He simply held her silently with a sad look. Though he did not cry she was sure at that moment he wanted to. She wished she could be stronger, like him. Fear suddenly crept over her heart as she recalled that time. She pushed images of his demise away from her mind.
Walking through the concrete halls, she noticed how empty they felt. The troops were probably all in their quarters, preparing for the journey that was to begin tonight. She was so lost in thought she did not hear her mother calling to her from just ahead, up the cobblestone pathway. When she got close enough to snap back to reality, Eleanor Cousland was red in the face. Her gray hair was tightly packed into a neat bun and her irritated face, though it showed signs of age, was flawless in complexion.
"Krista, haven't you heard me? I've been calling you since you came into my sights...
five minutes ago," she managed to utter through gritted teeth.
"I'm sorry. You know how I am with the thought of getting all...
gussied up like some cheap..." she smiled as she stopped herself from speaking the last word. "Well, you know..."
Her mother knew that was true enough as always, but there was something more in her daughter's face, something in her sad eyes that gave away her lies. Krista knew she had given herself away somehow by the way the older woman's face softened and became peach colored once more. She clearly knew what her daughter had been thinking about, but did not want to discuss such things at this time. Krista was grateful for that. She did not want to talk of such things either.
"Yes, I know you hate dresses and Maker forbid you wear the slightest amount of
makeup... but I let you wear this disgusting armor all day yesterday when some of our guests had already arrived. You agreed to wear a nice pleasant dress today and keep your nose out of trouble, lest you have forgotten, my darling gem."
Krista suddenly remembered their agreement and shrugged with a smirk. "Well, we have talked about the makeup, mother. It will only clog up the pores of my skin as I sweat it all off."
"Which is why you will not fight with any men today, stuffed or real. You want your father and brother to remember your beautiful face at its peak of perfection, don't you?" Her eyes were tired and filled with sadness when she said this.
Krista supposed the request was not outlandish at all. Both of the important men in her life loved her as she was, though they admitted to her that it truly warmed their hearts to see her wear gowns, do her hair and makeup and look more stunning than anyone could ever believe. She looked like true royalty when she did such things. She acted like it as well, except for when she opened her mouth, of course. They told her she commanded the attention of all men -taken or not- when she actually put effort into her appearance. The thought caused her to blush and become a bit flustered.
"All right," she agreed with a tiny distressed chuckle. "I will go bathe and look better than just presentable.
For them... But... can you do something for me, mother?"
Eleanor eyed her daughter suspiciously. "What is it?"
"Well, I need some new armor, you see..." she trailed uncomfortably.
"Other than being hideous, your armor fits you fine dear," she said as she rolled her eyes. "Though we all wish you would stop wearing those ridiculous attachments..."
"Uh... Perhaps showing you what's underneath them would make you reconsider..." Krista said as she sighed. "Come with me."
"Very well," the teyrna said with a sigh. "Let me see if you really have outgrown that armor. No one can tell with all the hiding you do."
She led her mother into a nearby room and set her helmet down on a nearby table. Two elven servants, a man and a woman, were scrubbing the floors. Krista did not mind their company, though she did feel awkward with the door wide open. She shut it promptly. She began to remove the straps around her waist that held the metal plate to her hips. As the plate dropped to the floor with a loud clang, the two servants looked up at them, startled.
"Eh-heh... Don't mind us. Just inspecting armor. You know..." Krista sheepishly mumbled. She then lifted the plate sheet from her chest and set it down gently beside the "chastity belt." Her mother inspected her for only a moment before cracking a smile and beginning to laugh.
"But you haven't even seen the back yet..." Krista said with a puzzled expression.
Gathering herself, the teyrna walked behind her daughter and let out another chuckle. Krista noticed the male elf gazing at her from the corner of her eye. The female elf quickly pushed his head down and whispered something elvish to him that made him begin to scrub the floor harder.
"My, my. Well, you weren't joking. I cannot allow you to prance around in this... more than formfitting garb any longer. No wonder you wear those silly plate pieces. I would too if I had your body and that tight armor. The men wouldn't be able to keep their eyes off you, even without makeup or a nice hairdo. I certainly don't know where you get your gifts from, because I never had such...
shapeliness, nor did your father, though I was quite the prize..."
"Mother!" Krista protested. She hated when her mother talked about such embarrassing things.
"We have a friend visiting for your brother's farewell who is very good at leather-working. You have probably seen him around the castle every now and again. He is your brother's friend and could make you a fine set if you asked nicely. Take this money and go find him before you wash up. He should be near the troops quarters. You smell an awful lot like the men he is used to dealing with. I'm certain that will deter him from seeking your company, if that is what you are worried about, though he is only a few years older than you. His name is Ser Garnet." Eleanor Cousland handed her daughter a small pouch containing some silver pieces.
"Thank you, mother," Krista said, relieved to finally be getting some new armor. She began to put on her heavy plate attachments once more when her mother spoke again.
"It seems you've...
matured since you last were in any of your dresses. Best make sure they fit nicely before coming out of that room of yours." Her mother smirked.
"And what happens if they don't fit?" Krista gulped, fearing the answer.
"Then we shall have the seamstress measure you and see if anything we have laying around in the boudoir will compensate for your... voluptuous developments."
Krista's face was a shade of scarlet. Glancing at the elves scrubbing the floor, she saw their faces were just as red. They both were scrubbing hard now, trying not to hear the conversation.
"It's only been two years since I last wore a fancy dress," she said, trying to ease the tension in her own mind. "I can't have grown much since then. I mean, I'm all done growing, aren't I? I've been done since... well at least a few years ago...Um..."
"It's been four years since you first got that armor of yours, Krista. You've grown a lot since then. Three years is not much less than four." She sighed. "And now we're scrambling to find you something to wear, anything that will make you look dignified on the day that your brother and father march off to war. You couldn't have possibly brought this up sooner?"
Krista chuckled nervously. "Uh... no time like the present, right? I guess I did not think much of it until today, maybe because I'm supposed to wear some tight dress. I don't mind wearing a dress today, mother. But please, nothing so constricting. This morning has gotten off to an embarrassing start. I'd rather not be flustered all day long if it's not too much trouble."
"Yes well, we will see what will actually fit you when the seamstress measures you, dear. She'll be in the troops quarters, making sure she's done all she can in way of preparations, no doubt. Go pay her a visit after you seek out Ser Garnet. After that's done, tell her to come see me so we can do something for you quickly. I also want to hear about the soldiers' morale. There's still a lot to be done today, Krista. And before I forget..." She swooped up the helm from the nearby table. " I don't want you hiding your face today. You are a Cousland. Be proud. Now hurry up and get things settled before I decide to tell Landra's son all about your recent developments." She smirked darkly, but with humor. "I would also tell him how interested you are to hear about how he has been."
"Ew! No! You wouldn't!" Krista was appalled. "I mean, you can't! I don't even..."
"Tick-tock..." Her mother trailed with a coy smirk.
Krista was out the door before the teyrna of Highever could utter another word. She would not put it past her mother to say something elegant and fancy to get Lady Landra's son very interested in Krista. The teyrna had been trying for years to arrange a courtship, ignite to spark between them, though Krista only glared imaginary daggers at him whenever he tried to compliment her. She would not be pushed into a relationship with a man who was just like any other, staring her up and down when he thought she wasn't paying attention and trying to butter her up with generic compliments. The thought of being offered to such a man made her cringe in disgust.
She was anxious to get her new armor and hurry up with the rest of her morning so she could tell the fool off once and for all. Then she would get another chance to plead with her father to let her go with Fergus one last time. She wanted to be there to watch Fergus's back. Being there to prevent his death would remove her painful fear of it, at least so she believed. She also wanted to watch her father and make sure he would not be slain as well. Her mother would do fine at the castle by herself; the family had no enemies. But Krista knew that she would be of more practical use with the troops than at the castle. She only hoped her father would allow her such relief and peace of mind.
