Trust

A/N: Part 2 of … 3! Originally this was planned as two parts but there will be a third – I would like to say that English is not my native-tongue and I apology for any mistakes. I hope you you enjoyed reading this small piece of work. Reviews are very welcome! So please let me know how you liked it and what I could do better the next time. Also I noticed a lot of spelling mistakes in the first part – I'll take care of them. Reviews are very much appreciated because they encourage the writer.

…......................................................................

Part 2


He starred at the ceiling not knowing how to answer the question. His heart was still racing and there was a small spark of desire still burning within his lower abdomen but his arousal was completely gone since the cold fist of panic had crushed everything inside of him.

“No”, he finally decided to answer as Altair moved into a different position and he felt his gaze burning into him.

“I need to know, Malik”, his words were whispered into his ear, soon followed by a soft kiss. “You screaming our safe-word is something I don't want to experience again.”

No, Malik didn't want that either. Truth be told, he was still terrified. The snippets of his memories had been short, very short, but it had felt as if it just had happened. Nothing he'd ever experienced before, nothing he wanted to experience ever again. For months he didn't have had any memories at all of the time he'd spent in delirium after they had cut off his arm. He was told that he was conscious during some time, but he couldn't recall those moments. After a year the first memories had returned in his dreams. He hadn't slept well ever since. But this – this – was something new and now he was scared that it might happen again.

He sighed as he made his decision. “Fuck you Altair. There won't be a next time so you have nothing to worry about. Now, let me up”, he murmured as he tried to push the arm away that was wrapped around his chest but Altair's hold got stronger.

“No”, his voice was a deep growl and for a moment Malik considered to do as he was told. “You can't run from your demons this time.” With this Malik shoved Altair forcefully off him, using his one elbow to sit up. He glared down at him.

“What?”, he hissed as he felt the anger rise within him.

Altair propped himself up using his elbows as well. He caught Malik's gaze and hold it. “Stay with me.” It almost sounded kind but didn't help to soothe Malik's anger.

“Fuck this”, he told Altair and got up, walking to the opposite wall to grab his pants and robe that lay in one corner of the room. He stood with his pants in his hands before he turned around to glare at Altair who hadn't moved at all.

“Get up. Get out of this bureau and go finish your mission has you had originally planed Altair.” He pulled on his pants not caring fastening them as he pushed his robes over his head and shoulders. His hand run through his hair as he tired to sort out his thoughts.

“This – all of this”, he murmured softly after long minutes of silence, his eyes starring at no particularly spot on the floor, “was a mistake. It will never happen again. We will never happen again.”


He could hear the rustle of fabric as Altair moved to sit up, resting his elbows on his knees.

“If I went to far – I apologize. But I can not follow your thoughts.”

Malik turned around, his angry gaze sending daggers into Altair. “Blasphemy! It is all blasphemy!”

Altair smirked and he wanted to punch him.

“Really? Blasphemy? I think it's too late to worry about that.”

Malik' grabbed his hair as if he wanted to pull it out as a frustrated moan passed his lips. “Just go”, he told Altair and it almost sounded like a whine.

Now Altair got up and he walked the distance between them until he stood only inches behind Malik. His lifted his arm and his fingers hovered over Malik's shoulder but he didn't dare to touch him, not yet. Finally he closed the distance and turned the man around to face him.
He leaned in, brushing his lips over Malik's but before he could finish the kiss he withdraw again and instead starred into Malik's eyes that were clouded with anger and fear.

For a few seconds they just stood there starring at each other before Malik's face turned into an angry mask and he used his arm to push Altair away. The push was forceful enough to let him stumble a few steps away.

Altair just stood there starring at his hands for a while before he nodded. “Good. If this is what you want then you should get what you want.”

The fist that hit Malik in the stomach caught him off guard. He doubled over in pain as he used his arm immediately to cover his stomach.

“What the fuck?” He starred up furiously at Altair but before he could do anything else, Altair gripped his collar and pulled him upwards again.

“After all we've been through, after everything we'd survived you tell me to leave – that it is over? Why?”, he demanded to know. Altair used his left leg and his weight to push Malik back against the wall.


“Altair”, Malik slowly said, “let me go.”

“No. Not until you tell me the truth.”

At this Malik smiled a cruel smile. “Stop acting like a woman Altair. I don't need to explain myself to you. Don't think I owe you anything.”

“You owe me everything!” Altair shouted, his voice raw with anger and he slammed Malik's right hand against the wall to hold it pinned above his head.

Unimpressed Malik lifted one elegant eyebrow. “Since when?”, he asked calmly.

“Since we started to share a bed”, he hissed and leaned in closer.

Malik laughed; it was dry and harsh. “Why so modest now Altair? It was sex, just fucking, nothing more, nothing less. So why do you make such a big deal out of it?”

It was Altair's turn to laugh now. “I make a big deal out of this? Tell me Malik, if it's just sex, just fucking as you've said then what is it you're freaking out about it?”

For a long time Malik didn't answer and just starred at Altair. Then, finally, he took a deep breath before opening his mouth to talk: “All this time I waited for his punishment but it never came. I guess I got careless, but now... I know better. He never stops watching us.” He locked his eyes with Altair's. “This was punishment. We can't put ourselves above the one and only, Altair. We're no gods.”

“Gods?”, Altair asked and looked dumfounded. “Is this about Allah?” Malik looked away and said nothing.

“No it's not”, Altair whispered. “You never cared about religions just as I did. Nothing is true, everything is permitted. We live by the creed, you told me that many times. Stop lying, Malik. It is me, Altair. Don't you trust me?”

The words hit him like Altair's fist had hit him before in the stomach.


Trust.

He blinked a few times before he starred at Altair.


Yes, he trusted him, more than anybody else. But could he still trust himself? All of this, all of what they had done the last couple of months maybe had went out of their hands. Maybe they had lost control – he knew that he certainly had lost it. Everything he had he had put into Altair's hands. He had given him control, permission to do everything to him he wanted. It was a sin, it was forbidden, it was blissful and it made him feel more alive than anything else. Sometimes when he was close to climax, Altair would have had pressed a hand against his throat to hinder him from breathing. It could have killed him, but he had trusted Altair to remove his hand before he would pass out and he'd done just that. To be with Altair was exciting – just the thought of what they had experienced together made his heart race. Malik knew with Altair at his side he could let his guard down. When Altair fucked him, Malik was all vulnerable – but he didn't mind that, he never did. In some way the fucking wasn't the important part. His own pleasure, his own satisfaction was not that important. What was important was that it were Altair who did all this to him, who shared those moments with him.

Did he trust him?

Yes, there was no lying about that and it never was the point really. But – but what had just happened had scarred him and it was something that was beyond fucking, beyond them sharing their bed as Altair would put it. It was nothing that Altair should know, nothing he wanted to share with him. What he wanted to share with Altair were those moments where he could lose himself, where he could stop thinking and worrying. He wanted to lose himself into that abyss of bliss again.

It had been Robert de Sable's blade that had cost him his arm – he couldn't let the man take this away from him too, could he? Malik had endured the pain of his arm being cut off. He had endured the loss of his brother. He had endured so many more during his life, this was something he could endure too.

“Of course I do”, Malik rasped.

“Then be honest with me.”

He leaned into Altair, his lips crushing against his as he felt new desire starting to burn inside of him. His tongue followed the lines of Altair's mouth as he hoped the other one would part his lips for his tongue to enter. But instead Altair withdraw and pulled his arm above his head away from the wall and used his upper hand to throw Malik to the ground. He hovered over him, looking down at him.

“Are you done with your drama?”, Altair asked him.

Malik nodded slowly. “Yes”, he answered, then looked to the side on the floor. “But I need you to do something for me.” At those words Altair raised his eyebrows in question. “Yes?”

“Control me. Use me, satisfies me. Cut me and hurt me as you had before.”

Because if I can get pass this nothing will stand between us.


Altair furrowed his brows. Malik could almost see how the thoughts rotated within his head. Then he nodded. “Alright.”

Malik looked up at him. “Alright?”

“Yes.” Altair nodded.


***


Maybe he should have known better. Altair was never the one to give up easy. It didn't really surprise him as he found himself bound and gagged on the floor.

“Beautiful isn't it? I learned it when I traveled through Asia.”

A boot tipped into his ribs and Malik rolled to the side. One long rope had been tied and knot around him in multiply places so in the end the rope looked like a complicated pattern on his body. His arm was behind his back but his hand lay upon the small of his back. It crossed on various places upon his chest and stomach and went between his legs back to his bound arm and spine. Altair had undressed him but at the amount of rope he had used on him Malik didn't feel naked. He felt more like a good tied-up package and very secure.

Altair knelt down and used his hands to roll him onto his back. He starred down at Malik while one finger followed the criss-crossing rope. Malik bit down onto his gag as a shiver went up his spine. Saliva dripped down his chin and onto his chest. Altair digged one finger in it and smeared it onto his skin.

“Beautiful”, he repeated and kissed Malik on the top of his head.

He leaned back and shifted his weight upon his lap and showed Malik the knife that he was holding. He brought the fingers of his left hand to his chin and tipped them upon it, his gaze focusing on the ceiling as if he was thinking hard about something.

“I still want to know, Malik. I want to know what cracked you.” He returned his eyes onto him and brought his right hand down. The blade cut deep into the skin upon his ribs, deep enough now to leave an ugly scar, maybe deep enough for Altair to stitch later and Malik suddenly was very glad for the gag as hot pain exploded in his right side. He closed his eyes in agony and tried to pull away but couldn't. Before he could recover Altair cut him again at the exact same spot he did before. The blade slid through his already bleeding skin and went deeper as before. This was new, something he hadn't felt before and damn it, it hurt. Altair stopped and looked down at Malik, a cruel smile upon his lips. His hand moved again and the knife attacked him for a third time, again cutting through the already existing wound.

Malik's breathing was hard as the pain invaded every part of his body. Altair leaned down to him and brought his lips right next to his ear so the they would brush against his skin.

“Safety and peace, Malik?”, he asked him and Malik shook his head. No. This wasn't all he could take. He was far away from his limits and he needed to show that to Altair.

Altair leaned back again. “Very well”, he told him and he pressed his left hand against his ribcage before he brought his right one down again. “Watch me”, Altair told him and Malik's eyes fluttered open to follow the blade of the knife. He watched how the tip of it slid into his body right underneath his ribs. A scream broke loose that was muffled by the gag as Altair stabbed him with the first inch of the sharp blade of the his throwing knife.

“You know, as an assassin I know the human anatomy very well”, Altair purred. “I know where to stab someone for them to die or where to stab to inflict pain. And this”, he twisted the blade and Malik thought he would pass out, “must hurt like hell.”

All he could do was lay there, gasping, sweating and panting as Altair finally withdraw the blade and a flow of blood found its way over his skin to the ground.

Altair eyed him for a few seconds and watched him taking deep breaths as he tried to fight the pain that burnt its way through his body. His hand pressed against Malik's chest just above his heart before he pressed his fingers further down until they hovered over the wound at his ribs. His palm connected with it and he made small circling movements, adding a little pressure to it. Malik groaned and tired to roll onto his side but Altair's other hand kept him in place.


Altair's gaze followed his body like a map until they stopped at his crotch. He removed his hand and took a hold of his cock, slicking it with his own blood as he started to stroke the yet soft member. Heat pooled in his lower stomach like liquid metal and slowly spread through his body. Malik closed his eyes to focus on Altair's hand toying with him, shutting out the pain coming from his ribs. Soon his breath hitched and he felt the blood rush through his body down into his cock making the muscle swell. He sighed through his gag as pain and pleasure mixed together. It felt like he was swallowed by something so intense that it was hard to breath through it that all he could really feel was the deep bottomless pit he was falling toward.

“For a moment I feared you were not here with me.” Altair's voice collapsed like a wave over him, drowning everything else with it and left Malik open and vulnerable to his touch.

The other hand that had hold Malik's body in place let go of him and started to move in a similar way over his body as the other one had before. Fingers brushed every curve, trailed over every muscle in such a soft touch that he couldn't help himself but to press himself against that hand, carving more of its feeling. When Altair's fingers touched his wounds Malik hissed but it was only for a brief second. He watched Altair collecting his blood onto his hand before it joined the other one on his cock, but he traveled further down until Malik felt curious fingers pressing at his entrance. The blood had made them slick and it didn't take long before two fingers had entered him all the while Altair never stopped stroking him. His hips moved on their own as Malik pressed down onto those skilful fingers that were already buried to the knuckles within him.

His sighs turned into a long moan as Altair started to move and his fingers pumped in and out of his body leaving him in a state of pure ecstasy as they hit his prostate over and over again. A third finger wriggled its way into his entrance and Malik thought he might die by the sheer pleasure he felt rushing through his body.

The first time he had sex with Altair it had felt strange and foreign to him to have something inside his body, buried deep within him. But now after they had done this so many times he just waited for the bliss that was about to come and he never got disappointed.

“All four, Malik. You're a eager little slut today”, Altair chuckled and Malik opened is eyes in surprise.

He wanted to speak between panting but the gag detained such things and he was pushed backwards over the floor by the force of Altair's fingers pumping in and out of him.

Malik watched him smiling down at him. “Four”, he repeated as if he would have seen the question sprawled upon his face. “It's like you're swallowing me. Do you need it that bad?”, and he almost sounded breathless as he curled his fingers inside of him that sent a bolt of pleasure through Malik and he had to close his eyes at the sheer ecstasy.

“I want to know Malik”, Altair leaned over him and his forehead touched his as his lips brushed over his as he spoke. “I want to know what it is that you're keeping from he”, his voice breathless and Malik bit down onto his gag as he changed the angle of his fingers going deeper still.

Malik felt himself loose around Altair's hand, his back arching and his toes curling as the tips of those fingers touched his prostate over and over again. He heavily panted now not sure if he got enough air through his nose, fearing he might pass out. A whimper broke loose as Malik realized it was not enough and that it never would be. He pressed against Altair as his chest rose from the floor. He felt desperate as if he would suffocate by all the things he felt. Tears started to form at the corners of his eyes as he wished his arm weren't tied behind his back as he wished to touch Altair to clung onto him and never let go. He wanted, he needed to feel the man above him. There was so much he could take but now he felt like as if Altair was his only anchor to sanity and he just couldn't take a hold of it because of the rope that held his arm in place. Malik shifted his legs and brought them around Altair's waist, his heels dug into his lower back and pushed him forward so he almost fell atop of him if he hadn't let go of his member to bring down his hand next to Malik's head to support himself.

His face was only inches from his own, hovering above him and those golden eyes starred into his and Malik suppressed a shudder.

“I don't want anything to stand between us. I already have your trust Malik.” He slipped his other hand free of Malik and he almost whined at the sudden loss of those fingers inside of him. Altair brought his bloodied fingers to Malik's cheek his thumb brushing over the gag. “I already have your trust”, he repeated those words only in a whisper, “now I want you to give yourself completely to me.” His hand broke away from Malik's cheek and Malik felt the tips of his fingers press against his throat. They wrapped around the sensitive flesh where the rope was tied secure around it and he pressed down. Malik starred at him wide-eyed as his survival instinct tried to fight Altair and his lungs desperately tried to pump air into them. His body begun to shook as it tried to crawl away from Altair but his mind screamed not to surrender.

Black dots started to dance in front of his eyes and he heard nearby water rushing wildly and loud. His veins started to bulge as the muscles in his throat tensed. He felt cold and hot at the same time, his cock throbbing with need as the field of his view started to darken at the corners.

“Safety and peace, Malik?”, he heard Altair asking again from far away, his voice the white light in a sea of darkness.

Before he could collapse, before his mind would lose consciousness the pressure at his throat faded as Altair had withdrawn his hand. Malik hadn't enough time to recover when he felt Altair moving and something pressed at his entrance. Through heavy fog he watched Altair above him, his mouth slightly opened as a moan escaped his lips as he buried himself inside of Malik. One of his hands took a hold of Malik's hips, his fingers pressing him down to the ground while his other hand crept over his chest and down his rips until it found the stabbing wound and one of his fingers pressed inside of it. At the same time Altair started to move, thrusting into him in one long and slowly movement that left Malik lightheaded.

Malik screamed against his gag but he couldn't tell if it was because of the pleasure he felt or the sheer pain that Altair's finger created as it wriggled inside of his wound as if it were looking for something.

Altair looked down at him and watched all of Malik's muscles went tensed. Sweat had started to from at his brows and Altair leaned down to lick it away. He burrowed his face at the juncture between Malik's throat and shoulder, gasping at the sensation he felt around his own cock. He used his hand next to Malik's head to press himself up again. The same hand slapped Malik hard in the face and another time and a third time and again and again until all Malik could hear was the ringing inside his ears and all he could feel was Altair's dick thrusting in and out of him as he set for a fast pace.

And all of the sudden it stopped and Malik could have cried had it not been for the gag that was still forced between his lips. The pleasure he felt only seconds before faded and he could feel blood dripping down from his nose. He started to whimper and tried to move his hips as Altair hovered perfectly still above him just watching. He pressed his heels against Altair's back to draw him inside of him further but it just wasn't enough. His chest felt like it was on fire by the pain from Altair's finger pressing into his wound spreading through his body and his head felt like it had split open in two halves. Tears were freely running over his cheeks now as he starred up at Altair, desperation and lust whirling within his eyes.

He watched Altair's hand moving and seconds later the gag had come free and Malik's head fell back onto the floor, his own rasping loud in the now silent room.

“Then I say it”, he heard Altair whispering. “Safety and peace, Malik.”

The finger removed itself from his wound and found his way onto his face, tracing the tears that had fallen. He bent down using both his hands next to Malik's head to support himself.

“Tell me”, he demanded and Malik couldn't stop the words that started to find their way over his lips.

“I hate you”, he whispered hoarsely. “I hate you for how you make me feel, for what you make me feel. All the time I'm confused and it is because of you!” He spit out blood and not all of it hit the floor next to him but dripped over his chin down to his chest. His eyes found Altair's and he hold his gaze. He wanted to hold the words inside of him but his tongue got loose and his lips started to move on their own. “I'm scarred – all the time and I don't know what to do. I keep myself asking questions that I don't know the answer to.”

Altair moved his hips and Malik gasped as his dick hit his prostate in a delicate way. He moaned and bit on his lips. “I can't – I can't forget the past and when I wake at night screaming I can't remember anything of the dreams but my arm's hurting. It still hurts and every time I look into your face I know it's because of you.”

He felt Altair slowly to move again and he groaned as the sensation rock through his body and his eyes found Altair's face and it surprised him to see a somewhat hurt expression.

“But when you hold me and when I hear your voice I know the man in front of me is not the same as he was at Solomon's Temple.”

Malik gasped and moaned as Altair started to set a slow and tortures pace that made him all aware of his own arousal. “Make me feel whole again. Hurt me and make me forget. I need you for I fear I might lose myself in our past.”

Altair reached down and cupped his face, his lips meeting his as he kissed him in such a soft way that he almost wasn't sure if they were really kissing. Malik melted into the kiss and the sensation of Altair's lips brushing against his lid a whole new fire inside of him.

“You don't have to hide Malik. Not around me. I'm here, I'm there for you.” And he repeated those last words over and over again as his thrusts became stronger and Malik's gasping between tears became louder.