The Soul and its Maker

Chapter 2

Luke’s POV

I never imagined Jade could be open and warm. I mean this is Jade. I wouldn’t be surprised if he really did bring back the dead. Hearing that, I expected his touch to be icy cold, but when he did that my heart fluttered in that special way. Some hidden tenderness melted through when his hand was on my shoulder, spreading like warmth over my arms and legs as fire, searing nerve endings that tingled, made my heart beat faster. I want to experience those feelings again, although Jade says I’m not ready. I’m tired of others doubting me, especially him cause I’ll prove I’ve truly grown.

“I’m sorry Luke, I don’t have your answers,” he sighed regretfully, pushing aside my bangs and kissing me on my forehead. His lips are so soft like flower petals on my skin, his cologne intoxicating it rouses my senses from sleep, skin so pale and perfect its made from snow, and smooth hair a curtain of blond satin caressing my trembling face. His deep base voice crept in lilting tones up in my neck, in my ear invading me to my core once more when whispering, “My apologies,” blowing gently inside its shell.

“It’s…it’s okay,” I stuttered in broken, shaky tones, gasping when he revealed a row of clean white teeth, a half moon turned on its side inside his grinning mouth, grazing my earlobe with them and teasing kisses along my jaw. “You scolded me. That’s the first time you’ve done that. I used to think it was bad, but maybe its good cause I have no common sense. I can understand you coming here to meet Guy in getting his help in rescuing Natalia and Ion from Mohs. After all, I’m still the same idiot you first met. Maybe Asch was right…” Dammit, I talk too much. What am I supposed to do when someone you think dislikes you says you’re not ready for a relationship, and then teases you?

“Maybe he was…at one point,” Jade mused, a hint of warmth creeping through as his lips played up to my other ear.

“If you can’t teach me how to truly live, can you at least show me what this trick…those strange feelings I’m experiencing are about?” I’m implored, shivering under his grasp. If I’m truly going to change I need to learn more about the world, about life, those things Jade calls “adult relationships.”

“Well, well.” His playful grin softened to a smile, manipulative, honest? I can’t tell. He wore a straight face releasing me, adjusting his glasses, before breaking out into another one, torturing me with, “Maybe until Guy gets here, if you promise to be a good boy and not tell anyone about what we’re doing. Because if you do and you’re naughty, well then, I’ll just have to punish you, Master Luke.” He wagged his finger holding back a grin.

“Uh, I won’t, I promise,” I replied, feeling stupid, glancing nervously towards the cave where I hoped Guy would come out and save me.

“You’re a bad liar, Luke. I can tell when you’re being naughty, or nice,” Jade scolded, sliding an arm around me. Ever so gently, yet fully in control he whisked me away from sight of the cave further behind the trees that shielded us.

“Wh…what’re doing?” I cried, failing in his grasp, pushed up against a tree trunk that parted wedging me firmly in place.

“Let’s try something,” Jade teased, fixing his eyes on me that twinkled through his glasses. “Since you say you’re an adult and you really want to change, perhaps you’re ready for the relationships adults engage in as well.”

“I am, show me,” I whispered, lost inside his eyes, sparkling rubies that glowed.

I see swirling deep inside their facets regrets of creating fomicry, of loosing someone he loved, perhaps a mentor and of taking life in battle. I remember when General Cecille met him she said, “Are you Jade the Necromancer, the one who wiped our forces at Hod?” with terror stricken she hid behind rational calm.

I want to reach out, touch, healing his pain because I know what it is: the guilt of taking another’s life, knowing that when you did, their hopes, dreams, aspirations died along with them because they are no longer alive to fulfill them, to chase them as a child does a butterfly in an open meadow even if the butterfly isn’t caught. The act itself gives us hope, a reason to live. I’m searching for my reason, my butterfly. It exists somewhere inside Jade because he created us replicas, even if he can’t put it into words, I’m sure someday the words will come.

I hope that by finding it in Jade, I’ll become more than just a failed replica as Asch called me, who can’t even control his hyper-resonance utterly useless to Van. I’m sick of being called those things and a spoiled brat by my comrades, who had every reason to abandon me back in Yulia City. But in this kiss I gave to Jade, my lips brushing against I want Jade to know I’ve changed because I’m not afraid to grow.

Although I want to, I’m also scared of those sensations I’m experiencing. They ran through me stirred from my deepest core, spreading like fire in my veins, as I felt Jade’s weight heave over me, pushing me into the trunk. I groaned arching back, feeling every vertebra in the curve of my spine from my tailbone up to the nape of my neck pressed firmly against the bark. It is rough, woody in texture and Jade’s body hot but restrained.

I have no idea how many years it’s been he’s done this kind of thing because for me it’s really my first time. The tenderness of his kiss, his tongue playing against mine inside my mouth, told me he revealed a gentler side of himself he hid deep down inside. It’s as if Jade has two hearts, one made of ice who is the soldier in him who has killed and wears that smile you can never read, and the other is made of fire: loving and human hidden under his outer heart of ice. I want to cry I’ve never gotten to know his warmer heart locked away from the world.

Sinking down from the trunk onto the wet refreshing earth, I felt grass caress my arms, and Jade’s weight settle over. He propped himself on his arms, cradling my neck beneath with his gloved hands reaching up, cupping my face. One thumb of his traced my lower lip, running along my jaw, over my eyes relaxing me. I needed no words. Something in him sensed my unease. He read me like an open book with intelligence beyond my childish understanding. I cannot help but wonder why someone so amazing as him, the father of fomicry, a genius in ancient Ispanian, fonic artes, history and more cares about someone like me. Was he trying to tease me by pretending to be my friend?

“I don’t understand you, Jade,” I murmured sorely, tangling my fingers in his silky brown hair, scented sweet with conditioner, highlights catching gold in the sunlight filtered above. “Cause none of this makes sense.”

He raised himself a hair’s breadth over me, allowing a cool wall of air to rush between our heated bodies, straining under their clothes. Eying me keenly, his face remained perfectly impassive, an impossible read, only a beautiful mask I find lovely for a man nearing middle age, with its delicate bone structure and fine milky white skin.

“Tell me Luke, is this the first time you’ve ever kissed…someone?” he asked, gazing deeply into my eyes serious for a change.

I swallowed feeling my throat tighten, entire being contract. “…Yes,” I admitted, ashamed. “I suppose its because I’m a replica, I haven’t had the chance to grow like others, experiencing the things they do. When I first arrived at the manor after I was created by Van, probably in the Replica Lab in Belkend, I couldn’t even walk or talk, really pathetic, huh? And living my life behind its walls, I never got the chance to get out and do things like date, meet people. During that time, I thought Master Van was the one person who loved me. That’s why I went to Akzeriuth, for his…love. Because his feelings gave me a reason…to live.”

My voice was choked with pain. “Now that my reason’s gone, I don’t know what to do, what I’m living for.”

“It’s easier to die than to live,” Jade sighed, closing his eyes in thought. “Accepting the truth of Van’s views of you and what happened is a difficult, but necessary thing.”

“How can you say that so…calmly?” I asked soulfully. “It seems nothing ever bothers you, does it, Jade?”

He slowly opened his eyes, gazing deeply into my being, his low rich voice soothing to my heart. “Human history is full of turbulence,” he said wisely. “Life has its up and downs as well. I suppose one learns to accept it. By doing that, living calmly in the present, one can best function in their rational mind, understanding what must be done.”

“But how can I, Jade? I’m a coward cause life is so painful, like causing all that destruction at Akzeriuth.” I hugged him hard, rolling over on top of him. He let his body fall into place supporting me, so calm and strong like a rock anchored in place and I’m water shaped by my surroundings as if in a container.

“No, you’re not a coward, just in pain,” he said softly, resting my head on his chest, tucking my bangs behind my ears. “I see you crying out in the middle of the night when you’ve had nightmares since Akzeriuth, crying out, “Please, I’m sorry, forgive me! I didn’t mean to hurt you and take your life.” And on that day you killed an Oracle Knight aboard the Tartartus when the God-generals attacked, you lied there awake at night shaking. When you asked me then, ‘How can you take human life, Jade?” I thought deeply about what you said. I’ve come to realize that I’m still lacking that part of my humanity, because I still can’t grasp for what it means for people to…die. That’s really the reason I can say things and stay calm in situations when people are normally scared.”

“We’re so opposite. That’s why I feel so responsible for the loss of life at Akzeriuth,” I sighed, burying my face in the crook of his neck, rubbing against the fabric of his rough uniform and its collar underneath. “Jade, every night I try to sleep, I see the peoples’ faces I killed, that one boy crying out ‘Mommy, Daddy,’ save me as he was sinking into the miasma and Tear and Natalia were helpless. He was only one life I saw swallowed before my eyes. How many hundreds more died like that in fear, haunting me in my sleep? Do you see the faces of people you’ve killed, Jade? I wonder if they became a part of the planet, at least their souls before returning as people.”

“Hmm, you mean reincarnation? It cannot be disproved, but neither is it exactly scientifically proven, much how we cannot say if Lorelei exists for certain,” Jade pondered, letting his chin sink to his chest caressing my face nuzzled to his neck. “As for religion, I don’t concern myself with fate, miracles or faith. I will atone for the sins of fomicry I created by taking it back from Van and ending it. You could say indirectly my creation of replicas that advanced research into hyper-resonance, causing the destruction of Hod, like how you destroyed Akzeriuth is the same guilt I carry within.”

“Jade…” I lost his name in my breath. I couldn’t believe he opened his heart to me like that. Perhaps its because I am a replica and he’s the father of fomicry we share this special relationship we can be close. “Thank you for being there for me. If you ever need a shoulder to lean on, I’m here for you.”

“Oh, just the two of us? Even alone at night?” he teased, tilting his head towards me, allowing his lips to brush over my cheek, with his chin still sunk down on his chest. “You know what that means…Luke.”

“No, no, that’s not what I mean!” I gasped, giddy with fear and excitement.

“I don’t like teaching, passing on knowledge, but this I feel is important for you to understand in part of being human,” Jade said gently, pushing me back an arms length. He stood up, helped me up to my feet and then dropped his gaze down, cupping my cheeks. “Luke, come here…” he urged, with a voice so deep and musical I couldn’t help but followed filled with his heart.

I trembled quaking in my very body I could hardly breath, feeling his touch on my cheeks send waves pulsating through every limb and sinew of my body. My heart fluttered pounding up in my throat, wanting to jump out from my chest into Jade, making me melt in his arms beyond all time and space. His arms wound around my neck as I inclined instinctively up to meet his larger height, our lips brushing at first, he whispered in my ear, “This” as his very voice sank into my soul.

“Jade…” I lost my voice again in his name. Suddenly, my fluttering heart burst out in my voice, I cried in low strained tones, “I…I love you, Jade,” seizing his lips in mine, claiming him as my own. Oh god, I can’t believe I said that. My stupid heart took control of my mind. Yes, he’d kill me and I deserve it. Those military types hate guys that like other guys, right?

“Yes, Luke, I know,” he murmured, his parted lips brushing on mine so lightly shivers shot through me, intensified when his teeth gently grazed my lips. “To be honest, when I first met you, I thought I’d never be able to like you.”

“Yeah, I felt the same,” I confessed, taking his lips back between mine. “I never imagined then I’d be having this sort of relationship, with you of all people.” I hid my face in his chest after our kiss ended feeling so confused. “Is it okay for me to like you like this? I mean we’re both guys.”

“You should ask Guy about that. You know I don’t like unnecessary explanations,” Jade teased, lifting my head up, tickling my nose.

“But this…” I paused noticing that after Jade and I kissed our bodies somehow reacted.

Not a hyper-resonance like Tear and I colliding when we first met, but a physical reaction deep down inside our bodies. I felt it through Jade’s uniform, straining under his clothes against his hip into mine. His face even now remained so calm, wearing that soft smile it seemed as if he didn’t notice his arousal. Feeling his desire somehow ignited mine, making me want to explore it more but my mental defenses came up. A twinkle played in his eyes when he realized my awareness.

“Is something the matter, Luke?” he asked, inclining my chin up so our eyes met.

“You’re…how do I say this? Aroused like me. My clothes are so…tight, it hurts,” I gasped, wanting to reach down under my pants and do something. No, I wanted Jade to. Isn’t that how you share special feelings with someone you feel close to?

“You should ask Guy about it as well. When you have, perhaps we can explore what to do about those…feelings,” he put it subtly, turning his attention towards the cave entrance behind our grove.

“Hey! Don’t leave me hanging!” I cried.

He released me from his grasp, fixing that cool but playful expression over his beautiful pale face. This only got more complicated. I just prayed from the bottom of my heart Guy won’t get mad at me for asking.

TBC

A/N: Next chapter will be some Luke/Guy as Guy teaches Luke about things. Then we’ll get back into Jade/Luke. Thank you for reading:D