UB2: What's The Story, Morning Glory?

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Universe Backstabber 2: What's The Story, Morning Glory?

By Harley Quinn hyenaholic

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Me: We're still in 'Universe Backstabber', where stabbing your friends in the back is fun and you're eight years older than you thought you were!

That makes Tails and Amy both 18, by the way, so it wasn't minors in Chapter One. Of course, if you'd read the huge disclaimer in Universe Backstabber 1, you'd already know that.

'Universe Backstabber'. Pretty catchy name, huh?

~~~

Prolouge

Yo, guys. It's me again. Tails.

Only I don't go by that name any more. 'Tails' is dead now. Gone forever.

It's Miles Prower now. Or Agent Prower.

Things have changed in the month since I raped Amy.

They've changed a lot.

No, Amy didn't tell. I guess she was too scared. She still hasn't told since I left. I guess she's too ashamed. But I couldn't hang around there any more. I didn't care about what she thought, but my friends... I realised that by raping Amy, I'd betrayed them, every single one of them.

I couldn't face them any more.

I realised that 'heroes' don't do that sort of thing. They don't betray their friends or their allies. They don't even betray their enemies. That was when 'Tails' died. That was when I left Station Square. That was when I became a merc.

~~~

Chapter 2: New Life, New Friends

I look over at my partner-in-crime. He's scoping out his target, recalibrating his sniper-rifle. He glances at me.

"You got the bodyguards, right?" he asks me, his voice low, "We'll never get outta here if you ain't."

"Yeah," I scope out one of them, the one nearest to the target. There's at least five, "Yeah, they knew the risks when they took the job."

We grin at each other - well actually I'm grinning into a walkie talkie, but hey, what're you gonna do? - and start the countdown.

"Five, four, three, two, one..."

I fire first, at the second nearest bodyguard. The nearest bodyguard has already thrown himself across the target. the second nearest is already dead.

Once the other bodyguard hits the ground, my partner fires his gun. The president is dead.

"Nice shot, Nack," I tell him through my walkie-talkie.

"Right back at you," the sniper weasel tells me, "Now lets get the fuck outta here!"

I could get away by flying away, but then that would break my cover. I mean, how many flying foxes do you know? Exactly one. That's why I tied my tails together with some string so that they'd look like a single one.

Nack is already bouncing down the building opposite on his tail. It doesn't matter all that much if he's recognised, though he'd rather avoid it for now. I start running down the metal stairs on the outside of the building, and duck inside so that I don't get shot running. A couple of soldiers collide with me and I duck under their arms. One slashes at me with a knife and I barely manage to dodge. I smash the nearest window, jump out of it, and fall three stories into a dumpster.

There's blood in my eyes, it's not making running easy. I must have cut myself when I jumped through the window. I smash through another window and into an office. People are staring at me. I'm screwed now. The job's gone arse up. We knew it wouldn't be easy but still...

But I don't stop, I run for the stairs - they're faster than the lift for me - and run down them. Run, just run.

~~~

I'm the first back at the hideout. Not by much though. Nack's right behind me. I turn to look at him, to have him in my sight. He's staring.

"Holy shit Prower, have you seen your face?" he asks me.

When I shake my head, he drags me over to a mirror. My face is covered in blood. There's a huge slash across it, about six inches, right over my left eye. I'm lucky I haven't been blinded.

"How the hell did that happen?" he asks me.

"I guess I didn't dodge the guy with the knife after all," I say with a shrug, holding my hand over my eye and sitting on the couch. I swear, I don't feel so great.

"You need stitches," he says, handing me some beer, "I'll call my doctor buddy."

I down the beer, "Yeah, whatever."

Nack goes out of the room to get bandages, antiseptic, whatever. I've been living in with Nic and Nack for a month now, ever since I started up that partnership with Nack in fact.

It's then that Nic waddles in, holding her stomach. She's looking pretty good for somebody who's eight months pregnant. I don't know who did it. Nack says it was rape, and that he'd like to kill the guy responsible. Nic sits down on the couch with a wheeze,

"Hey there, sexy," I grin.

Nic chuckles and punches me. Then she does a double take.

"Geez Miles, have you seen your face? You've got a-"

"I know," I interrupt. I'm going to be getting this for a while now, "Nack's getting a bandage."

"How the hell-"

"Guy with a knife," I say.

Nack comes back in with a bandage and wraps it around my eye quickly, then sits on the couch nest to Nic.

"Well, how did the mission go?" she asks us both.

"Let's find out," says Nack, picking up the remote and turning on the TV.

We watch the news. It's pretty cool. Assassination of the president by two unidentified furries, who got away. They've got vaugue descriptions - a fox with an extra fat tail who has now got a cut on his face, and a skinny, purple furry. Me and Nack high-five. The mission is so far a success.

Nic tuts - I think she's trying to become more responsible now that she's going to be a mother. She can't keep it up though - she high-fives Nack too, "Nice one, bro," she says simply, "Of course, they might just be saying that they don't know who it is."

"Loosen up Nic," I laugh, "You're pregnant, you're supposed to relax!"

Nic just smiles, "I guess," she says, "But holy shit, my back is killing me!"

The phone rings, and Nack answers it. I lean close to try and hear.

"Yeah?" Nack growls into the phone.

"It's me. I can't speak for long - the line could be tapped. I saw the news. You were successful."

"Oh, yeah. And my partner," Nack gives me a thumbs up, "Do we get the money tonight? If we don't, I swear..."

"Yes, okay," the voice says hurriedly.

"Uh-huh, you drop the money off, we make the pickup?"

"Yes. Same place as before?"

"It's safe."

"Who are you anyway?" I ask.

"Oh no, 'shhhh', the line's breaking up, 'shhhh', come get the money and a new job offer, 'shhhh'."

There's a click. The client is gone.

"That has got to be the worst impression of static I've ever heard," Nack tells me. He puts down the phone and tilts his hat over his head, grinning, "We gotta break out the bullet-proof shit, Prower," he says, "We got us a couple of million bucks to pick up, and I got me a hot date tonight I wanna be alive for."

"Be careful boys," says Nic, "I don't trust this new guy. Any employee who hides their identity is bound to turn on you."

~~~

By the time we get to the pick up point, me and Nack are pretty much covered in bullet-proof armour. Dying sure isn't on the menu tonight. And the money's going to be split fifty fifty. Nack's honest in that way at least. As for the cut, Nack's doctor buddy did a pretty good job. Now I've got stitches all the way down my face, but they'll heal.

The vastly obese figure holding the suitcase stands in front of us both, and we're both suddenly cowering.

Oh dear god, I've been working for Robotnik...

"Er... hi, Doctor Robotnik," I try to keep my voice polite, "We all thought you were dead. Uh... we found your corpse..."

"No! You found a corpse - a corpse of a clone of myself that I made! The clone was nothing more than flesh and bone; it never had a any spark of life. While people thought I was dead, I had time to set up a new secret base, build new and better robots, and set up a whole new plan to take over the world!"

He laughs. Fuck, that 'maniacal' laugh of his make my ears bleed.

"You did well, Weasel," his voice is suddenly low and dangerous, "You too, Prower."

"Thankyou... sir." We speak in unison.

"I should sign you both up as full time mercenaries."

Nack swallows and cringes, "Very... um... flattered, sir."

"I would be very interested to know," he watches me, swaggering slightly, "Why you are suddenly in this line of work."

"Er... complications with friends, sir," He knows I'm blocking. I feel nauseous. I should be attacking this man, I'm holding a gun, by all rights I should be firing it at him. He knows that too. He's so fucking smug at us both. God, I hate him.

"New partners, perhaps? Your payment will increase. Protection from the law will increase. What do you say?"

Me and Nack look at each other. We haven't agreed instantly. So we're not going to agree now. Nack's the first to answer.

"No sir, we'll have to turn down your generous offer."

I get the feeling he isn't happy at us turning down his 'generous offer'.

"Why?" he asks.

"Because, sir, we just don't trust you. Good luck in taking over the planet though!"

We take the money - 2 million bucks - and run. Best choice, for the time being. Stop at a strip club in Night Babylon. Club Rouge. And why not?

~~~

Home of the Happy Whore, some people call it. There's a rabbit already on Nack's lap, possibly his 'hot date'. He's laughing and shoving ten-dollar bills down her knickers. He sounds drunk already. But I'm more interested in the cat who's poledancing in front of me. She stops suddenly, as if called offstage, and there's another dancer going on.

It's Rouge.

I nearly spew my drink across the table. I knew she owns this place, I didn't realise she dances here too.

She hasn't seen me yet. It's time to go quickly. I start to rise carefully. Hopefully Nack won't notice me leaving.

He does. Grabs me by a tail.

"Wait Prower, this bitch runs the show, you gotta watch her," he says.

The volume on the speakers is turned right up and Rouge is dancing to it already. She hasn't even noticed me yet, and I'd like it to stay that way.

I pull my fedora over my face slightly, trying to disguise my identity. Rouge is a damn good dancer, but Nack is expessing his opinion of the fact loudly. Too loudly. I groan quietly and cover my face completely. You wouldn't think it was possible to get embarassed in a strip club.

Fuck, when Nack gets drunk, he gets dru-unk.

"Come on, honey!" Nack yells, "You're as good as my sister!"

Did I really hear that? Nah, Nack's just drunk.

He's attempting to climb on the stage.

I don't think I can stand Nack's bullshit any more. I pull my tail out of his grip and walk out. He can find his own staggering, drunken way back to the hideout.

That's when I'm jumped by six or seven thugs.

"Listen kid, we can do this the easy way or the hard way," says the first, just before the second hits me over the back of my head with something hard, and I black out.

~~~

End of Chapter Two! Go to Chapter Three! When it's up!

Me: Yo! I'm great! Tails has been jumped by thugs!

Who has jumped him?

Why have they jumped him?

Where will they take him?

Will I ever shut up?

Find out in the next installment of 'What's The Story, Morning Glory?'