Gone Adventuring

After some more traveling and some dirty looks from Jaheira, Tennas and co. finally arrived at De’Arnise keep. Time to get to business he thought, now what the fuck are we doing here again? Trolls? Ah shit. Those ugly bastards don’t know when to stay don’t. Tennas reviewed my companions and realize they could likely just fireball them into submission. He ordered his spellcasters to memorise every flame or acid type spell they can and confirmed to Jaheira that yes, this does override previous orders regarding second level spells. They made camp while hned ned his harp and make sure his bow was in good working order. Once prepared the party snuck into the hidden entrance and started running into trolls.

Tennas looked at the charred remains of the troll. “Strange”, he thought, “while it smells like a pair of socks that a swamp monster has wiped its ass with, this troll still smells better than Aerie’s cooking.” The party made their way into the kitchen and found a pot boiling over a stove. Tennas checked it and saw it contained some meat chunks. One of the servants they’d run into earlier had said something about stew. Ok, one of the servants they’d run into earlier who hadn’t been immediately ripped to shreds by a troll had said something. Apparently it was used to feed some monsters in the dungeons. Aerie piped up, “Maybe we can use this stew to distract the monsters in the dungeon so we can slip past.” I considered the option and began to nod. That was kind of what I’d had in mind. “Great idea Aerie”, I said and the elven cleric/mage beamed with delight, “could you just guard the door for me while I get the stew ready?” Aerie nodded and went to check the outside hallway while I grabbed the ferverleaf out of my pack and chopped it into the cooking pot. This would be a diversion all right.

The party headed upstairs and after some searching found Nalia’s aunt. “What a crabby old bitch”, Tennas thought, “I’m guessing it has been too long since she’s gotten any. If circumstances were different I’d use my skills to brighten her mood. Of course I normally don’t try for women who are so old. Or bitchy. Or at least not at the same time. Or at least not unless I’m so drunk I can’t even remember my own name.” Not screaming or waking up a woman getting out of her bed had been a major subject at his school. Even when a woman appeared to have been assaulted by a gang of ugly stick wielding thugs he could stifle his revulsion and flee with his belongings without her ever stirring.

Finally the old bat took her leave and Tennas began searching for the hidden passage which is supposed to lead to the dungeon. “Why the hell would they build a dungeon entrance of the second floor”, Tennas muttered to himself, “Did the builder of the keep think they might like to drop down for a spot of torture before bedtime?” Finally he found the catch and the secret door swung open. They headed through and Tennas noticed a room off to his left as well as the stairs directly in front. Cautiously Tennas peered into the room. At first he thought there were just statues in there but his magical training kicked in and he realized they were golems. “Fuck that.”, Tennas muttered, “That’s one ass kicking I won’t mind avoiding.” He headed out and began to head towards the stairs. Suddenly the part of him brain not thinking about women, booze, singing or singing and drinking with a woman on his lap managed to get his attention and pointed out something had been very odd about those golems. He reversed course and took a second look. He called Nalia into the room and pointed out the ms. ms. She shrugged and said, “They’re probably just guardians of some sort.” Tennas said, “They look rather …. accurately sculpted.” Nalia replied, “They were probably made by some artist friend of my family then enchanted. What is your point?” Tennas reached over, put his hand on her head and pushed it forward to lower her gaze by about three feet. Nalia’s eyes nearly popped out of her head as she noticed the anatomical correctness of the golems, she said “Holy shi… um sugar”. Tennas did some mental calculations and then commented, “Nalia, This room is only accessible from your auntie’s room isn’t it?” Nalia’s face froze in a grimace for a second before she rallied and said, “I’m sure she never knew about this place.” Tennas continued, “Only I noticed that the golems are rather dusty except around waist height.” “I’M SURE SHE NEVER KNEW ABOUT THIS PLACE”, Nalia reiterated. Tennas thought better of pointing out the signs of grease on each of the golem’s synthetic manhood and just headed to the staircase leading down into the dungeon.

After a few more dead trolls Tennas stood in front of a door eyeing it carefully. His nose had picked up a nasty scent and his monster lore had provided the source: Otyughs. He peered through the keyhole and saw a number of them milling around looking for a meal. Readying the pot he quickly opened the door, threw the stew inside and slammed the door shut before putting his weight against it. He heard the sound of the otyughs inside moving around and then hungrily devouring the stew. The sound died down as they searched for any remaining scraps. Then there was mostly silence for a minute. Tennas strained his hearing and heard the otyughs start to move around again slowthenthen quickly. After another minute they were really banging around obviously distressed. Tennas heard the sound of crunching wood and forced himself against the door even harder before he realized it wasn’t his door that the otyughs were slamming against. Tennas heard the otyugh charge out into another room which was quickly followed by the sounds of surprised trolls and then quickly followed again by the sound of angry trolls. Tennas listened to sounds beyond the door and winced in partial sympathy as he heard the trolls roar in shock and pain. The trolls definitely weren’t happy with what was happening and Tennas hoped the odds were being adjusted in their favor. Aerie spoke up, “What do you suppose is happening?” A mental image started to form and Tennas grimaced and tried to force it from his mind. He tried to picture a naked woman in his head and instead got the image of a troll in a dress batting its eyes seductively. “They’ve probably gone into a feeding frenzy”, Tennas lied. The sounds of battle started to die down so Tennas yelled “Charge”, as he flung the door open and led the assault. The trolls had managed to subdue the otyugh but were still recovering despite their accelerated healing powers. “Fireballs all round”, Tennas yelled and he and his companions began turning the room into an inferno. After a minute the last troll dropped and Nalia moved to the body of her fallen father.

Soon after the party had trekked back outside and Nalia turned to Tennas. She handed over the reward money that she’d promised and began a little speech. Tennas listened in horror thinking, “You mean if I’d chosen to be a muscle bound, monosyllabic fighter I’d be able to be lord of this place? I could have had a convoy of peasant girls lining up to visit my bed. Ah crap.” Then the new lord of the keep, Isaea Roenall, arrived. Tennas was not impressed with his title, his manners or the fact that this prick would be getting all the peasant girls. Or not, looking at the fop Tennas wondered if he might have a taste for young boys instead. The party trudged away from the keep with Tennas considering the results. On the plus side, he’d gotten paid. On the minus side, he could see Nalia was too depressed to be likely to give him the “special bonus” he’d been hoping for and that prick who’d just claimed the keep had really gotten on his nerves. Tennas tried to think of a clever plan to turn the situation around. The obvious route of storming the keep again and kicking some ass was out, the new lord had brought new guards and they’d likely get their asses handed to them. Composing a song to ridicule Isaea was another option but songs that weren’t seduction related really weren’t his style. Suddenly the perfect plan sprung into his mind and he nearly snorted out loud at the thought of it. “Time for a little entertainment”, Tennas said as the women looked at him curiously.

Later that night Tennas and Nalia crept silently around the inside of the halls. The first part of his plan had gone well. He’d found the berries he’d wanted out in the bush, thankfully his herb lore was comprehensive when it came to intoxicants. He’d snuck into the kitchen and poured the berry juice into the cask of ale they were serving out of. He’d been worried they might notice the taste so he’d sample the ale and nearly thrown up. The stuff tasted like horse piss to his refined taste. Or it could even be horse piss; the servants might not be particularly fond of their new master either. The pair camped just down the hall from the nearest privy. After a little more than an hour and numerous drunken party guests having come and gone, Isaea had finally come stumbling along and headed into the privy. They waited until he’d staggered back out before Tennas cast a sleeping spell at him. He dropped like a sack of potatoes and they quickly grabbed him and hauled him away. Since everyone was downstairs either serving or drinking the second floor was empty. They hurried him into the secret room and placed him into position. Nalia began lubricating each of the golems there with some grease she’d taken from the kitchen. She wasn’t doing it terribly well as she was trying to avert her gaze from what she was doing. Tennas claimed to have used a divination spell earlier to work out the correct command words for the golems. Actually he’d just used a divination spell to find the old bitch’s diary and looked them up in that. Finally the preparations were finished and they admired their handiwork. Tennas gestured at the bound and gagged Isaea who was starting to regain conciousness. “Would you like to do the honours?” Nalia smiled wickedly and said, “Initiate sequence C”. The smallest of the golems lumbered forward and into position. Both Tennas and Nalia turned away as Isaea roared in shock and pain. This was only the smallest golem, they would each take their turn in ascending order of size.

The pair carefully closed the secret door behind them while giggling like children. Tennas sensed the moment had arrived and pulled Nalia forward and kissed her passionately. She seemed shocked for a moment then began returning the kiss. They began fumbling with each others clothes as they moved towards the bed. “He auntie’s bed”, Tennas remembered, “Well, hopefully she won’t be bothered by it.” Tennas managed to pull Nalia’s robe off and found she didn’t bother with any kind of bra underneath. He began suckling on her nipples while she moaned and ran her fingers through his hair. After working on both nipples Tannis began reaching downwards and came across something metal. He looked downwards and found that Nalia had some kind of metal belt covering her private regions. “What the fuck?” he asked. Nalia glanced downwards and said, “Oops. Forgot about that. It’s a chastity belt my father put on me to protect my virtue.” Tennas examined the lock on the belt and said, “No problem, one knock spell should…” “Nope.”, Nalia interrupted, “I got it after I started mage training so father made sure it was protected against magic.” “I suppose you can’t pick the lock?”, Tennas asked. “I would have gotten rid of it ages ago if I could”, Nalia replied. Resisting the urge to scream in frustration, and ignoring Little Adventurer pointing out that it would settle for any other hole that happened to be available, Tennas racked his brain. An idea came in and he said, “Stay right there.” He ran back to the secret passage and opened it up. Ducking inside he found the first golem had finished while the second one was busy punishing the helpless Isaea. Tennas called the first golem out then pointed to the chastity belt and said, “Break that lock.” The golem reached down and easily snapped the lock apart. Tennas ordered the golem back inside. He then pratically leapt on top of Nalia who’d managed to remove the remains of the chastity belt. Tennas moved straight to the pussy that had nearly been denied to him and cupping his hands around Nalia’s ass began eating her out. Nalia wrapped her trim legs around his head and began squeezing him into her pussy. She began moaning and rubbing her crotch against his face. Tennas began probing into her love hole with his fingers and soon confirmed she was still a virgin waiting to be taken. Tennas was in no mood for gentleness though and used a spell he’d been taught at barding school that would block any pain Nalia might feel. He positioned himself and began working himself into her. He reached her maidnhead then thrust past it. Nalia’s gasp was pure pleasure and he said a brief thank you to the goddess of magic. Tennas began thrusting himself into Nalia slowly but building up speed. He went back to suckling on her nipples and could feel her tight pussy grasp hard against the “little adventurer”. Tennas had only once made the mistake of not getting a woman completely naked before sex. He’d chatted up some northern, adventurer woman in an inn and they’d gone upstairs for some fun. He’d gotten impatient and entered her while she was still partially dressed. He thought it would be a novel experience. Instead the gauntlets of ogre strength she was wearing amplified the power of the muscles in her pussy and nearly crushed the “little adventurer”. Her grip was so tight that he hadn’t been able to pull out and it took some careful whimpering and pleading before she realized the problem and had loosened up enough. He spent an hour soaking the little adventurer in a potion of healing that night and was determined that it would never happen again no matter how drunk he got. Nalia wasn’t going to offer the same problem though unless she cast a spell to amplify her strength and Tennas was certain she’d never be able concentrate enough to even remember the name of a spell. He kept pounding into her before he finally reached climax and spurted his load into her. Thankfully he’d asked Jaheira to cast a prevent pregnancy on Nalia before they’d left. She’d given him a nasty look when he asked but had eventually complied. After some more cuddling and kissing, Tennas decided they’d both had enough. Plus the muffled screaming from next door was bugging him. They quickly dressed again then snuck off into the night.