Brothers in Arms

Coward, servant, blind man

Never explain - your friends do not need it and your enemies will not believe you anyway. - Elbert Hubbard

Day 1: Kiev to Suceava

The next day started early. Big Boss woke with the dawn, internal clock forcing his eyes open as the sun was only just beginning to crest the horizon outside.

"Arthur, wake up," he said softly. The other man muttered something. Big Boss shook him. "Arthur." The lines around Arthur's eyes creased, and Big Boss frowned and put his ear to his lover's mouth, hoping to catch the words.

"No, leave them alone," mumbled Arthur. "I'll give you it... I'll tell you... Please, just stop... No more, I'll.. I'll--"

Big Boss sat up abruptly. Arthur hadn't mentioned any nightmares. He shook his head slightly, then pulled Arthur into his arms. It woke Arthur instantly. "You're safe," Big Boss said. "And I'll fix this," he said. It was exactly what he'd said to Arthur then, and as the man opened his eyes, Big Boss felt relieved that it was exactly what he needed to say again.

"Boss," said Arthur. He shook his head to clear the sleep out of his eyes.

"You okay?" asked Big Boss quietly. Arthur froze for a fraction of a second, then nodded and laughed it off.

"Just a dream." He smiled. Big Boss thought it looked a bit tense, but he decided to let it drop.

"What happened last night?" he asked.

"The operator... did something stupid." He pulled a Geiger counter from beside the bed. "The readings are pretty high, even this far away," he said quietly. "I... It's worth it, right?" he asked, looking into Big Boss' eyes with a sense of desperation.

"Of course it is," said Big Boss, gazing deeply into Arthur's frightened eyes. After a moment, the other man turned his eyes down, embarrassed.

"What about on your end?"

"Well. We didn't get as much as we wanted. Only filled the trucks halfway." He took out a cigar and lit it. "Not the best case scenario, but there's more than enough." He took a long pull and held it in for a moment before blowing it out. "On the bright side, no one will know it was us if all the evidence is destroyed."

"Oh, another bright side to a nuclear catastrophe." Arthur waved the smoke away. "I don't think it needed it. It's already glowing." Big Boss sighed and inclined his head. "Put that out," Arthur said grumpily.

"What? Cigars haven't bothered you for years."

Arthur pulled the blankets down and pointed at a small, circular burn-mark on his inner thigh while staring stonily ahead. Big Boss put the cigar out with a sigh and leaned over to kiss Arthur gently.

"I am going to fix this, Arthur," he said.

"I know, I know." Arthur's eyes started to rove around the room. "We should get ready to go."

"Maybe we should talk about all this..."

"We have a limited amount of time," said Arthur with a shake of his head. "We have to get to Baghdad as soon as we can. So..."

Big Boss sighed and gave Arthur a hard look. He put a finger lightly on a half-healed cut that ran from Arthur's right eyebrow and traced it down to his shoulder. He pushed the other shoulder a little and watched Arthur wince. It had been pulled out of the socket a few too many times recently. His eyes were determined, but Big Boss felt certain that his second in command was in pain.

"This really isn't good for you," he said finally. "But you're right, we don't have time for it." He stood up and pulled a uniform out of his pack. "We'll be crossing the border into Romania today, right?"

"That's the plan," said Arthur. Big Boss heard the sound of fabric rustling behind him as he pulled on his own trousers. "We should make Suceava tonight at around 8pm. I've got the hotel name somewhere with the maps."

"Good." He did up the tie on the Russian dress uniform carefully, then sat down and pulled on a pair of socks. "Do I look Russian?" he asked, stepping into a pair of shoes.

Arthur turned, jacket still laying on the bed, and looked critically at Big Boss. "You don't quite measure up to Ocelot," he said. Big Boss raised an unimpressed eyebrow at him. "You've got the command look down though." Arthur gave him a semi-mocking salute, a half-smile appearing on his face.

Big Boss shook his head. "Just don't pull any of that outside."

"Do I look stupid?"

Big Boss looked at the cuts with a frown. "You look damaged
, which is worse. And now you look hurt as well. Don't be like that."

Arthur shook his head with an annoyed frown. "You go wake everyone up. I'll be out in a bit."

Big Boss sighed and picked up the Russian hat.

He woke the rest of his men before bothering with Ocelot and his
. He half-hoped they would decide not to come, or even that they would decide to try to kill them all. A battle in the morning might have been devastating to the men, but it would have got the adrenaline going and given him an excuse to put Arthur's veto aside.

Unfortunately, they were all on their best behavior. Ocelot even asked Arthur if he could be of any help
. Help! As though Big Boss needed Ocelot anywhere on his team.

He didn't have time to talk to Arthur again before they had to leave. The men got onto their bikes, the six men driving the trucks got in, and then they were off.

The driving was very simple. They stopped at noon for a quick break near the end of the highway at Rivne, and Big Boss checked the supplies. With four extra mouths to feed over the next few days, things were going to be tight.

"Arthur," he called. The other man was checking his bike for damage, probably thinking about the mission. Big Boss' shoulders fell slightly when Arthur didn't answer him. He was thinking too much again.

Big Boss walked to Arthur and put his hand on the other man's arm. "Arthur?"

"What--" Arthur jumped. "Oh. Sorry. Don't sneak up on me."

Big Boss looked down for a moment. He hadn't exactly been quiet. This... sensitivity? It wasn't like Arthur at all. Big Boss had to force his arms to stay by his sides. They couldn't afford the obvious weakness of an embrace. "We're going to need to stop for some supplies," he said, meeting Arthur's gaze.

"Great. As though we don't have a schedule to keep." Big Boss nodded slowly and refrained from mentioning that it was Arthur who'd wanted to bring along the extra people that made extra supplies necessary. "Maybe... can it wait until tomorrow? A quick trip into Unirea, or maybe a stop near Bucharest, would really help things. I'm a bit worried about the border crossing."

"It can hold for now. But we're going to need extra fuel, as well as food. It's going to cut the profit margin."

"Fuck the profit margin! There are more important things..."

"I know that. You know that. But the men don't. Ocelot and his people don't. We can't afford to-"

"I'm not in the mood to discuss this," said Arthur through clenched teeth. "Look. We'll stop off tomorrow, after the border crossing is through."

Big Boss nodded. "Right." Arthur's shoulders had pulled themselves up tensely. All his muscles were taught. "You know, I..." But nothing he said would be enough, not this time. What could he offer? "We'll be leaving in a few minutes."

Arthur nodded shortly.

---

Night 1: Outside Chernivtsi

Around 7:30, the lead truck blew a tire. Big Boss waved it to the side of the road and the rest of the convoy stopped at the side of the M14 highway halfway between Mamaivci and Chernivtsi.

"Blew a tire," he called out to Arthur as he kicked his bike stand. "Get a new one?" Arthur glared at the offending tire for almost half a minute before he started to the back of the trucks.

Big Boss shook his head for a moment, then took the jack off of his bike and brought it over to the truck. The hairs on the back of his neck rose at the approach of a familiar presence.

"I see you've planned for every occasion, Boss. Must be difficult on such short notice," said Ocelot.

Big Boss kept his hands on the jack, but his focus was entirely on the other man. "You're no slouch yourself when it comes to missions on short notice," he said quietly. "How exactly did you rescue Arthur?"

"He was in the wrong place at the wrong time, and they were the right ones for me." Ocelot smiled snidely. "Upset that your second in command couldn't handle a few Reds?" Big Boss frowned. "Or is it just because you weren't there to save him personally?"

Big Boss winced. Had he known that Ocelot was hiding in the shadows, he'd never have embraced Arthur, no matter the circumstances. Even in front of their own men, it was a rarity. It was just so great a weakness-- if the world knew he cared for someone, the world would take advantage of it. Hadn't they already? And the world didn't even know
... He simply couldn't afford to show affection. He'd just been so worried... and the look on Arthur's face had been so frightened... "I don't know how you did it," he said quietly, "but if I find out you--"

"Boss!" Big Boss turned his head quickly to see Arthur running towards him. The other man didn't say a word until they were close enough that none of the men would hear him. He glanced at Ocelot for only a moment before he started. There was a spark of fear in Arthur's eyes that Big Boss didn't like. "Someone's sabotaged the supplies. The spares are slashed, and I don't think we should trust the food." He held up a dead rat. "This guy was in there."

Big Boss glanced at Ocelot, who still wore his lazy, arrogant smile. He had something to do with it, that much was certain. Someone had to go get new supplies before they started out. At this point, he wouldn't be able to trust any of the men except Arthur. Still, it couldn't be all the men... And he wasn't going to leave anyone alone with Ocelot.

"Right," he said, nodding shortly. "We'll stop here for the night. Get the men to get everything out of the truck. Ocelot and I will go ahead to Chernivtsi, restock our supplies and get back. See if you can figure out who did it."

Arthur nodded. "Right. We'll need to plan a new route, too," he said, his face turning down into a worried frown. "This deadline is really tight. Any delays are going to affect it, badly."

Big Boss bit his lip and looked at Arthur. He wasn't one for mincing words: they might not make it in time. Telling that to Arthur though...

Ocelot put a hand on Arthur's shoulder. "Don't worry. We won't miss the deadline. You've got me with you. And I never miss." Arthur smiled gratefully at Ocelot.

What the--? Big Boss stared in surprise for a moment at Ocelot's familiar manner and Arthur's strained smile.

No. Absolutely not. There was no way he was going to let Ocelot get anything out of his partner. Big Boss scowled and walked between them, not coincidentally pushing Ocelot's hand away. "Come on, we have to get everything ready," he said a bit too forcefully.

"Right," said Arthur. "I'll go supervise. Shouldn't take more than a few minutes to get everything out."

Big Boss shot Arthur a half grin as the other man walked away before turning to Ocelot. "What's your game?" he asked softly without any preamble once Arthur was out of earshot.

"Game? This is no game, John," said Ocelot, his smile belying the serious tone of his voice.

"I go by Big Boss. And I'm absolutely not tolerating anything that will hurt him more. Now, what do you want out of him?"

"Jealous?" asked Ocelot with a small laugh. "All I want is to be on the winning team. And that's yours."

"That's the biggest load of bullshit I've heard since I went into business for myself. If you think you're going to hurt any of my people, you'll find that I'm a worse enemy than I was the last time you faced me."

Ocelot smiled with his eyes half closed. "Good thing I'm not against you now, Boss."

"If you want information, you will ask me for it," Big Boss growled.

It was almost disconcerting. They hadn't seen each other in years, and Big Boss had liked it that way. They hadn't met in battle or anywhere else since Big Boss found out what had happened to all the heads of science on Big Boss' bases before Arthur. How many of Big Boss' scientists had Ocelot killed? His partner hadn't liked it either when he'd told him, so for him to insist on keeping the man who'd masterminded the execution of his predecessors, he either hadn't recognized the nickname shalashaska yesterday or thought it was a different man. Or, in the worst case scenario, he was simply so distracted by the situation that he hadn't noticed.

It had been a long time since Big Boss hadn't had a proper second in command to count on. He wasn't used to this... second guessing Arthur's decisions...

"Just get in the truck," said Big Boss finally with a shake of his head to clear it. Arthur looked to be supervising the removal of the last few pieces of equipment.

Big Boss watched Ocelot open the door, then went to Arthur's side. "Remember what we said before about trusting others?" Arthur nodded. "It goes double now."

"Okay, Boss. I'll try to find out who did it while you two are gone."

"Thanks, Arthur." Big Boss looked up at Ocelot, who was adjusting the rear view mirror. He clapped a hand onto Arthur's shoulder. "Separate sleeping arrangements tonight. And see if you can get a watch rotation. You take first, I'll take second, split the rest of the men as you see fit."

"Great, organization again. Thanks, Boss."

Big Boss rolled his eyes and gave Arthur a grin before going to the front of the truck and getting into the driver's seat.

"He's tense, isn't he." Ocelot leaned back in the passenger seat.

Big Boss glanced at Arthur in the mirror. There were signs of tension in the straight-backed way he was giving orders, in the lines around his eyes that Big Boss could tell he was trying to hide, and in the pulled up shoulders. "All missions are hard," said Big Boss quietly, readjusting the rear-view mirror as he spoke. "And this one's got some added difficulties for everyone."

Ocelot leaned back. "You don't seem to be having problems with it."

Of course he was. Any mission Arthur had trouble with, he had trouble with. He just couldn't show it to the men. As a high ranking officer in the Russian army, Ocelot should have known that backwards and forwards. Strike that, he did know it backwards and forwards. So he was saying it for some other purpose...

Ah. He was looking for a tell. He wanted to know how much difficulty Big Boss was in because of the situation. He forced himself to relax completely. "And you are?" Big Boss gave a half-smile.

Arthur banged on the door. Big Boss rolled down the window. "You're good to go," said Arthur. "And... come back soon. Okay?"

Big Boss met Arthur's eyes and held the eye contact. "Don't worry, Arthur. Is there enough light from the supplies to make camp?"

Arthur shrugged. "We'll make do." He gave Big Boss a strained smile. "Go on."

Big Boss rolled up the window and pulled back onto the highway, turning the headlights on. Ocelot took one of his guns out of the holster and began turning it around on his finger. Big Boss said nothing, but kept half his mind attuned to where the gun was pointing while he drove.

After several minutes, Ocelot got bored of playing with just one gun. He pulled a second out.

"Who're you showing off for?"

Ocelot paused and the guns rested on his fingers for a moment before he started twirling them again. "He isn't in your league, is he," said Ocelot conversationally.

Big Boss glanced at the other man. Ocelot was staring through the front window as though he had no real interest in the answer to his question. There they were then. Each was going to pretend they had no interest. "Emmerich is very good at what he does."

Ocelot paused again for a moment, then put the guns away. "He says you're a band of mercenaries." Big Boss nodded cautiously. "So what's your price?"

"We're good at what we do," said Big Boss with no little pride. "We choose the price based on the cause and the need. And what the client can afford, of course."

"So is this one about the cause or the money?"

Big Boss was silent for a moment. "Didn't you check your intelligence before you... saved Emmerich's life?"

Ocelot leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes. "Do you think the world doesn't know he's your lover?" he laughed. "Even if I didn't know, do you think I'm some sort of idiot and you could hide it from me? He's not in your caliber," said Ocelot with contempt coloring his tone. "If you can't hide it, do you really think he could?"

Big Boss grit his teeth. So the world knew they could control him through his partner. "Tell me something I don't know," he mumbled.

"How much do you think it'd take for him to sell you out?"

Big Boss stiffened slightly. "A lot more than you've got to offer him, Ocelot."

"I think it wouldn't take much at all." The voice was grating on his nerves. "I think he'd sell you for a song if he thought he would be recognized by the world. You've given him everything he's got, but you haven't given him that."

"You haven't done your homework. He doesn't want that anymore." Big Boss leaned into the plastic seat and readjusted his grip on the wheel. "He's not just a scientist anymore. He's not going to be controlled as easily as you think."

"Yes, because soldiers and officers are so much more difficult to deal with than scientists," said Ocelot condescendingly. "You and I both have experience dealing with all the levels of this... deceptive world."

"Hm." Big Boss shook his head. "You're worse than I am. Do you even know what loyalty means?"

"Loyalty. What a quaint concept, when we all betray our countries." Ocelot laughed. "I've heard a mercenary judges a man's worth by his price and his value. Where does loyalty enter the equation?"

Big Boss growled. Chernivtsi was rising on the horizon. They had to finish restocking quickly. He couldn't be back with Arthur soon enough.