Nobody's Somebody Redux

Watching his two best friends was agony, pure and simple.  After returning from the long quest to rescue them, Sora had come to terms with a lot of things about himself; chiefly that his childhood crush on Kairi had long-since passed on, transferring itself with irrefutable firmness onto Riku.  And for a while, he’d thought that maybe his feelings were returned, that they could go home and maybe make a little confession…

Well, there’d been a confession.  And watching Kairi and Riku kiss and cuddle, giggling together over who-knew-what, their heads bent low – he wasn’t a jealous person by nature, but there was only so much of seeing the person he loved above all reason with someone else.  He was reaching the end of his rope, watching Kairi’s fingers trailing through Riku’s silvery hair.  Why couldn’t it have been Kairi? He could have gotten over Kairi – had already gotten over her.  Girls were a dime a dozen on the island, and as the returning hero, he could have had any of them at the crook of his littlest finger.  He didn’t want any of them. 

Kairi laughed, low in her throat but loud enough that Sora – sitting just a few feet away while his oblivious best friends made out right in front of him – could hear her clearly.  “Oh, Riku.  You know I love you, right?”

Sora felt his heart clench in his chest.

“I love you too, Kairi,” Riku murmured.  The clench threatened to spread to his lungs, and Sora found he couldn’t breathe.  Why not me?

Deep in his mind, he could feel Roxas’ pervading sadness for his plight, and felt a moment of selfishness – Axel had returned mysterious, wearing only a pair of stolen jeans, wandering the beach.  Sora’s mother had taken him in, treating him like another son, and Sora was confronted daily with the renewed agony of Roxas being caged within his heart, unable to even reunite with his love. 

A fresh round of giggling came from his two best friends, and Sora couldn’t take it anymore.  Clenching his teeth against a howl, he muttered “I’m going to the Island,” and stalked off without waiting for a reply.  Glancing back over his shoulder, he realized he wouldn’t have gotten one anyway.

 

Down on the beach, Sora looked at the play island, and then found his gaze wandering out over the open ocean.  It’d be so easy…

-Don’t kill yourself,- Roxas warned, a note of panic in his voice.

Sora sighed; you really think it’d come to that?  I couldn’t do that to you.

Out loud he said, “I’m perfectly capable of swimming out to the Island, you know.”

-You also know that I know what you’re feeling,- Roxas pointed out.  Sora ignored him in favour of plunging into the water, grateful that feelings were all that were communicated.  He didn’t know if he could handle the idea of Roxas knowing what he was thinking, too – or if he could handle knowing Roxas’ thoughts.

 He crested a wave, pulling himself easily through the surf and feeling the warm, salty spray on his face brought back memories of his childhood.  For the first time in days, he smiled.  It grew bigger as the considered the plan taking shape in his mind, grateful again that Roxas couldn’t read his thoughts, only his heart.

The island grew larger as he came closer, and he let the waves carry his weight up onto the sand.  He pulled himself up only far enough that he’d be out of the immediate vicinity of the lapping water, flopping down onto the sand still warmed by the sun.  He wrote R+S in the sand, surrounding it by a heart, and then erased it.  “It’ll never happen,” he said quietly to himself.  “Not with him and Kairi as close as they are.  Roxas,” he added, louder.  “You deserve a chance to be with Axel.  You guys have a lot of missed time to make up for.”-Well, yeah.  But I’m not even sure if he remembers me or not.  He only barely remembered you.- 

“I didn’t mean anything to him,” Sora said.  “He hasn’t said anything about you because he’s worried you’re gone.  He doesn’t want to know for sure.”  Quietly, “I know the feeling.”

-Wait, what are you planning to do?-

Sora held his hand out, wondering if the keyblade would come to his hands here on the Islands, in the absence of heartless.  He felt a tug inside, and a bright light flashed, forming the keyblade.  It felt good in his hands, a familiar weight.  He gave it a few practice swings, relishing the sound of the air swishing past it.

“Sometimes, I wish I’d never come back.”

“Hey, Sora!”

Keyblade in hand, Sora glanced up guiltily.  Riku and Kairi were coming to the island in a boat, waving cheerfully.  Sora felt his heart clench again, a muted moan of pain from Roxas echoing his feelings.  They’d never get there in time.

-Sora, what are you planning?- Roxas, almost worried.  Sora thought fondly on his first clear memory of Roxas – you make a good other.  That’s what he said to me.“I hope you make a good other,” Sora said, and turned the keyblade on his own chest.  A flash of a memory, protecting Kairi’s heart, and then freeing it – plunging himself into darkness, turning him into a heartless, and giving rise to his Nobody, Roxas.  He hoped it would work again.

“Sora!”  Kairi’s voice, panicked as she realised what he was doing.  “Sora, no!”

Sora closed his eyes, and pushed the point of the keyblade into his heart.

 

--

I reread the old version.  It's a fairly good idea, I guess, but... I SUCKED.

So I had to rewrite it.  Thus...