Forbidden Access

A/N: This story assumes that Snake and Otacon were already lovers when this started... very CLOSE lovers. Warning: Snake seems OOC here... you may blame me; a lot.

It was often enough that Snake would find himself injected with something or other. Hell, the last thing they shoved into his system was the foxdie virus that would run in him. He knew he was there, that was the difference. But right then, the documentation he brought Hal that day, was somewhat different. There was something different about the way it was said to be running in his nanoes and about the way that it showed signs that it could cause him to self destruct when triggered. So he had to ask. “Does it say what triggers it?” by now he was used to the idea that he was going to die but it still wasn’t appealing whatsoever.

Hal shook his head. "I'll look into it more.." he said softly. He pushed up his glasses and sighed, looking at the papers. "You shouldn't do anything for the time being. Just until I get enough information." he added. He hated seeing Snake in any sort of torment but he knew he had to help in one way or another. Even if it meant losing his life in the process.

“I’ll try to be still for the time being.” Snake said as if it was a very complex task to be put up to. However Hal was right and he needed to be still and behave for a while. Well now he was somewhat trapped in here for the time being and simply waiting for something… ‘death, maybe?’

Hal looked at him. "Snake... Everything’ll be alright..." he said patting his shoulder. "You'll see..," he said sitting down to research.

Snake nodded and leaned back to get some rest. It was turning to be a variation of Foxdie so far: the trigger was near the same: A list of people in particular, and the effects were similar; heart failure. The difference was how it was reverting the virus to attack Snake instead at the close proximity of the target.

Hal sighed and started his search. He once in a while would look back at Snake over his shoulder. "Talk to me…" he said. "I hate silence you know that…"

“What would you like me to tell you about?” He asked, you could hear the smirk on his voice: He wasn’t one for words but he could fill the silence with something else if he could get his hands on Hal.

"A-Anything.." Hal replied sensing the smirk. "Anything you want…"

Snake got up and leisurely placed his hands on Hal’s to lean in and kiss his neck. “I’, not one for talking a lot.” He confessed to the man as he ran his fingers over his arms. “But that’s not the only background noise I know how to make.”

Hal blushed and looked back at him. "Oh really?" He replied with a small laugh.

Snake took that chance to kiss him properly. He could already feel something strange about this but he decided to ignore it for the time being in favor of pulling his arms around the other man and taking a better angle so that he’d call his attention instead of the computer. “Yeah, really…” he said.

Hal smiled and kissed him back wrapping his arms around Snake's neck to pull him closer. "Show me..?" he asked softly.

Snake was frowning and breathing heavily at this… at it wasn’t arousal either… “I…” he evaluated this for a moment and started reading over Hal’s shoulder. “… found my target…” he added pulling away from Hal instinctively to clench a hand over his heart at the vicious pain.

Hal got up and went to him. "S-Snake..? What's wrong?" he asked trying to help him to the chair.

Snake looked at him and tried to get his breathing under control. “Y-you’re killing me.” He explained, trying to point out the documentation. There was something Hal was doing that was making him feel the irony everywhere.

Hal looked at him and backed away slowly. "I-I'm the trigger...?"

At the distance Snake was able to finally let out a breath he was holding and pant his way into somewhat stability. It appeared to be so.

Hal sighed a little and leaned against the wall. "I-I’m sorry..."

It was slowly sinking in that he couldn’t touch Hal and Snake was already refusing to accept it. He got up and slowly started making his way back to the man like a moth drawn to the flame.

Hal looked at him. "W-What are you doing?! You're going to die if you come near me!"

It hurt more to have Hal have to push him away like that than the very dying Hal spoke of. Of all things, of all ways for him to go, this was the most unfair. “I’d rather die.” He explained.

Hal looked at him. "I-I don't want to see you in pain..." he said softly starting to cry.

And right this moment Snake was tempted to kill himself… in more ways than one. He didn’t want anything more than to walk up to Hal and hold him… nothing more. But at the moment he stepped back and lifted his hands while trying to be reassuring. “Look, I’m staying away.” He told Hal. “I don’t want to see you cry.” He added.

Hal looked up. "H-How could I be the trigger...? I-It's not fair.." he said falling to his knees.

Snake got how the world could be unfair to him, but Hal: Why Hal? “I think they could write your genetic code and I get why…” he explained, tempted to just screw it all and walk up to his fate happily. “I can’t live like this, Hal.”

"I don't like seeing you live like that..." Hal said hugging his knees to his chest.

After thinking about it, Snake decided he could just organize himself better… just a bit less touching. “We’ll get through this, Hal.” He said, thinking about it better. “We just need to keep looking this thing up and to see if we could find a cure.”

Hal nodded and slowly got up. he went to his computer and started searching

Frighteningly nothing was showing up.

"Dammit!" Hal said slamming his fist on the desk.

“Calm down, Hal…” he recommended before taking a tentative two steps closer, if anything, just to keep him calm.

Hal sighed and looked at him. "T-There's nothing..."

“You’re going to have to kill me. I can’t do this.”

"N-No..." Hal said. "T-There's got to b-be a way to make you better...!"

Trying to be patient, Snake decided to sit down and wait. Perhaps Hal could point him out in the right direction for this to work and soon enough he’d be nuzzling Hal and kissing his neck in peace again. ‘Hoping, Snake, I thought you knew better’. He thought.

Hal rubbed his eyes. "I'm going to keep working...you get something to eat and rest..."

“You need something?” He asked as he got up and looked for what he needed to go look for something to eat.

Hal shook his head and continued his search. "..."

Snake sighed and left. Before looking for something to eat for both of them. In Snake’s eyes, the data wasn’t going anywhere so Hal could take a rest as well.

Hal pushed up his glasses as he searched through some military databases. He hacked into other places trying to find any answers.

“You need to eat something.” Snake insisted once he got back.

Hal shrugged. "Not hungry..." he said softly.

“I’m serious.”

Hal looked at him. "I'm not hungry really…" He replied

He really wished he could pull him out of the computer and feed him but at the moment he had to rely on either convincing him nicely or going nuts while keeping safe distance… and then it hit him how ridiculous that sounded. ‘Safe distance from my Hal… damn it.’

Hal sighed a little and went back to typing. He didn't want to eat, sleep or leave the computer until he found anything to help Snake.

“If you didn’t have your strength you could die on that keyboard… then I’ll be /really/ left alone… and possibly hug you until I die.” He threatened… He wasn’t good at this; why couldn’t Hal just cooperate. He opened the food and served it in case this tempted the man as well.

Hal looked at him. "Snake people can survive weeks without food. As long as I have water I'll be fine."

Snake looked at some of the fried sausages and made a plate of this and the rice he bought, he then got up and walked up to Hal. “You’re eating this.” He threatened, seeing as now he had to stay away from him and he was sure Hal wouldn’t like him approaching.

Hal sighed. "Snake! Stop it!" he said putting his head in his hands. "Do you want me to find a cure for this or not?"

Snake just stood there, looking at Hal with a plate in his hand. He looked pensive and as if he was holding something back: You’d have to have seen him hold things back before to notice as his psyche went down. “…”

Hal sniffled and went back to typing and searching.

As a last resort Snake walked up to Hal and stretched his hands to put the plate next to the computer with a fork in it. It was when he was going to eat that he brushed against Hal and had to hide the wince from what felt like an air bubble brushing past his heart. It was probably an artery that couldn’t contain the blood in that particular heart-beat. ‘Have to be careful’ he thought as he took five breaths and started to eat.

Hal continued searching for a few more hours only taking mini breaks to use the bathroom and to get some tea or water. He didn't touch the food, which by that time was freezing cold.

And by said time Snake was weary of walking up to him to take it away. He liked his heart-beat and he could use it being nice, regular and unnoticeable. But Hal had to sustain himself and he was about to start taking drastic measures really soon. “Are you going to sleep?”

Hal shook his head. "Not tired yet..." he said although he was starting to feel exhausted.

Snake then armed himself and went to grab the plate with the attitude with which a child approaches something hot again after it burned him. “I can’t carry you to bed, alright?”

"I know." Hal replied. "I'll go to bed on my own." He added nodding. "Get some rest..."

Snake nodded and did as he was told, grabbing some things and wandering off to the couch. He set it up and tried getting some sleep, only to turn his back on Hal and grip a fist on the fabric of the pillow at the prospect of sleeping alone again… and fuck that, he wasn’t going to cry… right?

Hal sighed a little and stretched, cracking his back. He continued searching and writing various notes before finally passing out on his desk at 6 in the morning.

When Snake woke up he had to go through the embarrassment of wiping his face clean as quick as he could less Hal ended up seeing… Hal… He thought as he stood behind the man. “I knew it.” He muttered before hesitantly stepping behind him. He could already feel the awkward rhythm and the instinct of leaving and dread that his body was giving him in the sudden prospect of death as he gently wrapped his arms around the man to carry him to bed. He only got to the couch, though, since the sharp pain was even worse than he remembered and by the time he got to the couch he was on his knees and placing Hal on it while panting.

Hal continued to sleep and ended up curling up on the couch. He made small noises in his sleep and rolled over.

Once Snake saw that Hal was on the couch alright he sat back on the floor and pulled himself back until he was sitting on it and away from Hal’s signature reach. He was panting and gripping his chest and regretting now the fact that the pillow was probably slightly damp from his tears… Still he could try to convince Hal that he’d been the one crying in his sleep: He’d buy it.