schedule
January 29, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Hm. You really could do with developing your exposition; what you've got here is technically good, and plenty hot, but I'd recommend working on narrative, rather than plain mechanics. This will in turn lead to longer chapters, which as I said last time was a problem before.
schedule
January 25, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Mm, gettin hot and heavy. You could do with some longer chapters, methinks.