schedule
May 7, 2011 at 12:00 AM
This is good, very good. I am a fan of the Legend of Krystal myself
schedule
May 4, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Wow!
I never thought you would continue this story. I remember reading this waaay back, and im glad you've decided to carry on.
Realy looking forward to the rest of it :)
Keep it up!
I never thought you would continue this story. I remember reading this waaay back, and im glad you've decided to carry on.
Realy looking forward to the rest of it :)
Keep it up!
schedule
February 27, 2011 at 12:00 AM
Hey dude! I got your email and came right over. I must say I found this to be quite a surprise, I only just played this game last week. Wednesday I believe... But nonetheless, I liked this. Yes, lizard dudes with giant cocks! Yeeess! I almost wish I were there... Curse this reptile fetish of mine.... Grah! But also, I did come across a few errors here and there and to say the least, they bugged the crap out of me. I'm sowwie... Your fanfiction is still good though, and you can expect me to be back to read more. And if you want, I can even take some time to beta-read for ya too.
See ya Tuesday.
~Haggis... Why? Why me?
See ya Tuesday.
~Haggis... Why? Why me?
schedule
March 11, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Nothing wrong with a little ber-chiki-wow-wow. Personally I throw in a million pages of storyline and, in my up-and-coming chapter (14), Fox is going to yiff her brains out for the first three pages. (I typically run around 8-11 thousand works. I have no idea why. >_>)
Anyhow, your story makes for an amusing read and chapter one is fine. You can always say she was being submissive at first because she was still shocked and wanted to get through it... then, later, when it didn't stop, she decided to get more aggressive. Or vice versa. It's fan fiction. Write her however you think is really hot. xD
Just have fun with it; that's all that matters.
Anyhow, your story makes for an amusing read and chapter one is fine. You can always say she was being submissive at first because she was still shocked and wanted to get through it... then, later, when it didn't stop, she decided to get more aggressive. Or vice versa. It's fan fiction. Write her however you think is really hot. xD
Just have fun with it; that's all that matters.
schedule
March 6, 2010 at 12:00 AM
ARGH! You sonavabitch! I finally get into the mood to write and something based on that game was right at the top of my list!
Nah, I'm just messing around. You're doing a pretty good job so far and I'm looking forward to what kind of scenes you come up with beyond what was in the original material. I suppose there is nothing stopping me from doing something inspired without using the game as my foundation... Anyway, I hope you keep it coming.
Nah, I'm just messing around. You're doing a pretty good job so far and I'm looking forward to what kind of scenes you come up with beyond what was in the original material. I suppose there is nothing stopping me from doing something inspired without using the game as my foundation... Anyway, I hope you keep it coming.
schedule
February 21, 2010 at 12:00 AM
I like how you did this little flash game, No1. I liked the flash game, and a fanfiction version of it sounds like a lot of fun. Just so you know, a forum run by "Renara" is expanding on the game, and already has an updated version out. You might wanna check it out.
schedule
February 19, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Nicely done here. Some of the grammer is a bit off but, I think i'd be the last to talk. Anyhow, I was planning on writing a similar piece...and still wouldn't mind if it was at all okay with you. Don't wanna overstep a boundry or anything...
schedule
February 10, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Very good. There's little tiny nitpicks, like, near the end... you say "damn" when you should have used "dam", because of the way he was cumming in her and all that stuff.
Basically, it's very interesting to see the way you portray her as once-again helpless. I'm not against that - it's all good, right? Good luck with your story, bro. I, too, have a goofy little story about Krystal I'm writing. Just posted chapter 7 of it, as a matter of fact. She doesn't get raped in it but she winds up having a fair amount of sex and masturbation but for a far, far different reason than most write... I mean... the way I see it... if she's the LAST member of her race, her body is going to go through some sort of hormonal change and she's going to want to become a mother, right? Gotta restart that race, right? ANYhow, she's struggling with THAT right now, heh.
Like your other reviewer, I suggest you continue before you run out of inspiration to keep going. Unlike my story, where I keep the sex scenes short (they'll be longer with Fox than they will be with Panther and Bill Grey, after all), you make it for a good portion of your short chapter. Concise and right to the point; ain't NUFFIN wrong wit' dat! heh. So then... carry on! Good luck with chapter two. :)
-Kit
Basically, it's very interesting to see the way you portray her as once-again helpless. I'm not against that - it's all good, right? Good luck with your story, bro. I, too, have a goofy little story about Krystal I'm writing. Just posted chapter 7 of it, as a matter of fact. She doesn't get raped in it but she winds up having a fair amount of sex and masturbation but for a far, far different reason than most write... I mean... the way I see it... if she's the LAST member of her race, her body is going to go through some sort of hormonal change and she's going to want to become a mother, right? Gotta restart that race, right? ANYhow, she's struggling with THAT right now, heh.
Like your other reviewer, I suggest you continue before you run out of inspiration to keep going. Unlike my story, where I keep the sex scenes short (they'll be longer with Fox than they will be with Panther and Bill Grey, after all), you make it for a good portion of your short chapter. Concise and right to the point; ain't NUFFIN wrong wit' dat! heh. So then... carry on! Good luck with chapter two. :)
-Kit
schedule
February 9, 2010 at 12:00 AM
Hot stuff. Write more. Don't wait for reviews and don't wait around in case you lose motivation like soo many authors on this site who start something and never finish it. Write now!
SailorNemesis
SailorNemesis