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January 25, 2010 at 12:00 AM
God DAMN, this story is awesome
I just wanted to say…how often do you look for a random PWP, but instead stumble upon a plotted story written about characters you actually care about portrayed in a believable way which has all your favorite genres and sex on top?
I have never thought about these two characters together, having only played Tomb Raider Legend last year and one Duke Nukem game like…12 years ago. But what a world it would be if they existed in the same universe lol. The kind of games these both are really are conducive to the exotic land and alien/pyramids scenario you’ve described here.
And how nicely you describe everything. :D Rich and detailed, but not wordy, or purple. I never forgot that they were in a sticky jungle or forgot that Lara Croft is cool under pressure and brilliant at what she does. And her reactions to Duke’s cruder statements are hilarious. I love that this story is not necessarily dialogue-based, and that there’s a lot of nonverbal communication and glimpses at their thoughts. Some of my favorite descriptions were whenever they admired each others’ muscles and overall strength, and small things like when you describe the tone of Duke’s voice. Low voices = my fave.
I agree with the reviewer who said both characters are likeable. I found Lara to be a little annoying while playing Legend, just because she seems flawless. Something about her always succeeding, being a gorgeous, gymnastics trained, intelligent, gun-wielding archaeologist made me want her to slip up just once, even though I was the one playing her lol. But somehow I feel like your portrayal of her is very IC and still likeable. Probably because Duke Nukem is there, balancing her out.
And there’s another great part of your story! I LOVE how you portrayed him here. How easy is it to go overboard with his stupid sayings…but his one-liners are really well placed in that it’s unexpectedly funny and real and doesn’t make me want to vomit with cliché and cheesiness. I swear, on that one part where he was looking at Lara’s sleeping face and “he realized what he was feeling,” I was anticipating something like “Oh shit.” (i.e., love) or “Hunger.” Shows you how creative I am. I was saying “Aw” so much at what Nukem was thinking and doing so many times, which is not something you normally associate with him.
Your sense of comedic and sexual timing is really great. Other than whenever Duke talks, one of my favorite parts was when they were just exploring each others’ bodies in the river, but nothing was really happening yet. It made the later part on the boulder even better, and when Lara was slapping the hell out of him and they kissed for the first time it was explosive…funny, hot and sweet at the same time. and…and when it was over and they were just laying there, someone else could’ve written something stupid like “bam they were in love” but you kept it light and in perspective, so hallelujah to your pacing things. A lot of the things they do are SO romantic beyond the sex…looks, intertwined fingers, consideration for each other a la the sleeping bag and Nukem’s second thoughts on the second pyramid…and even if these two don’t end up in love in the end, this is one hell of a ride, made all the sweeter by being able to read the things they think about each other but aren’t willing to say out loud.
I know there’s like a formula when you’re writing, especially pieces like this…certain predictable events and obstacles need to occur to move the plot along and build relationships with the characters and stuff. I came in with certain expectations for how things would play out, but so far, only the good things have come true. The negative expectations I had, like of Duke being overly macho all day long and of Lara being unreasonably cold to him for the most part were shattered. The best compliment I can give is that when I read this, it was like reading about real people, real humans (and aliens). All of their actions and reactions seem natural and logical, and other than the sexual instead of blood sacrifices situation, nothing seems too contrived.
I think another reason I like this story so much is because it's so original and has a previously untouched place in my memory now...had someone else written it, I would've had their version stuck in my memory tainting any future stories I read about either character...I just really like your writing style and am extremely happy I came across this.
Before you dismiss my enthusiastic review as exaggerated and full of careless praise, I’m not trying to compare this story to novels or whatever…but as far as what I’m personally looking for when I read fanfiction (entertainment, some likeable characters, plot, some believability, and the sense that the writer is in control of the characters and story and knows where they’re taking it), and comparing this to other fanfiction, this far exceeds my disappointed and declining expectations of stories on the internet, and is definitely one of my favorite stories I’ve ever read. ^^ And trust me, I’ve waded through a lot of shit to find this and few other gems, lol. My appreciation of this kind of writing is to the point where I would definitely read this again in the future, regardless of whether you finished it.
You were probably already aware of your writing strengths, but I just wanted to let you know specifically the stuff I appreciated since I come across it so rarely. =) Thanks!
I just wanted to say…how often do you look for a random PWP, but instead stumble upon a plotted story written about characters you actually care about portrayed in a believable way which has all your favorite genres and sex on top?
I have never thought about these two characters together, having only played Tomb Raider Legend last year and one Duke Nukem game like…12 years ago. But what a world it would be if they existed in the same universe lol. The kind of games these both are really are conducive to the exotic land and alien/pyramids scenario you’ve described here.
And how nicely you describe everything. :D Rich and detailed, but not wordy, or purple. I never forgot that they were in a sticky jungle or forgot that Lara Croft is cool under pressure and brilliant at what she does. And her reactions to Duke’s cruder statements are hilarious. I love that this story is not necessarily dialogue-based, and that there’s a lot of nonverbal communication and glimpses at their thoughts. Some of my favorite descriptions were whenever they admired each others’ muscles and overall strength, and small things like when you describe the tone of Duke’s voice. Low voices = my fave.
I agree with the reviewer who said both characters are likeable. I found Lara to be a little annoying while playing Legend, just because she seems flawless. Something about her always succeeding, being a gorgeous, gymnastics trained, intelligent, gun-wielding archaeologist made me want her to slip up just once, even though I was the one playing her lol. But somehow I feel like your portrayal of her is very IC and still likeable. Probably because Duke Nukem is there, balancing her out.
And there’s another great part of your story! I LOVE how you portrayed him here. How easy is it to go overboard with his stupid sayings…but his one-liners are really well placed in that it’s unexpectedly funny and real and doesn’t make me want to vomit with cliché and cheesiness. I swear, on that one part where he was looking at Lara’s sleeping face and “he realized what he was feeling,” I was anticipating something like “Oh shit.” (i.e., love) or “Hunger.” Shows you how creative I am. I was saying “Aw” so much at what Nukem was thinking and doing so many times, which is not something you normally associate with him.
Your sense of comedic and sexual timing is really great. Other than whenever Duke talks, one of my favorite parts was when they were just exploring each others’ bodies in the river, but nothing was really happening yet. It made the later part on the boulder even better, and when Lara was slapping the hell out of him and they kissed for the first time it was explosive…funny, hot and sweet at the same time. and…and when it was over and they were just laying there, someone else could’ve written something stupid like “bam they were in love” but you kept it light and in perspective, so hallelujah to your pacing things. A lot of the things they do are SO romantic beyond the sex…looks, intertwined fingers, consideration for each other a la the sleeping bag and Nukem’s second thoughts on the second pyramid…and even if these two don’t end up in love in the end, this is one hell of a ride, made all the sweeter by being able to read the things they think about each other but aren’t willing to say out loud.
I know there’s like a formula when you’re writing, especially pieces like this…certain predictable events and obstacles need to occur to move the plot along and build relationships with the characters and stuff. I came in with certain expectations for how things would play out, but so far, only the good things have come true. The negative expectations I had, like of Duke being overly macho all day long and of Lara being unreasonably cold to him for the most part were shattered. The best compliment I can give is that when I read this, it was like reading about real people, real humans (and aliens). All of their actions and reactions seem natural and logical, and other than the sexual instead of blood sacrifices situation, nothing seems too contrived.
I think another reason I like this story so much is because it's so original and has a previously untouched place in my memory now...had someone else written it, I would've had their version stuck in my memory tainting any future stories I read about either character...I just really like your writing style and am extremely happy I came across this.
Before you dismiss my enthusiastic review as exaggerated and full of careless praise, I’m not trying to compare this story to novels or whatever…but as far as what I’m personally looking for when I read fanfiction (entertainment, some likeable characters, plot, some believability, and the sense that the writer is in control of the characters and story and knows where they’re taking it), and comparing this to other fanfiction, this far exceeds my disappointed and declining expectations of stories on the internet, and is definitely one of my favorite stories I’ve ever read. ^^ And trust me, I’ve waded through a lot of shit to find this and few other gems, lol. My appreciation of this kind of writing is to the point where I would definitely read this again in the future, regardless of whether you finished it.
You were probably already aware of your writing strengths, but I just wanted to let you know specifically the stuff I appreciated since I come across it so rarely. =) Thanks!
schedule
November 24, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Woah baby! More please!
ch3
ch3
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November 20, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Story reminds me of the mag cover of Duke and Lara with her topless. I didn't like Duke then, but I like how you portray him. Aw. :D
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October 26, 2009 at 12:00 AM
This is great! Really hot! More please!
ch2
ch2
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September 5, 2009 at 12:00 AM
chapter 2
Well...I guess that was better, sorry it's the whole 'i can't have kids because of the plane crash' thing that I found stupid. I mean in order for that to happen she would have to have been impaled through the stomach area and if she had she wouldn't have lived. It just really was a downer and made it hard to enjoy the rest of the chapter.
Well...I guess that was better, sorry it's the whole 'i can't have kids because of the plane crash' thing that I found stupid. I mean in order for that to happen she would have to have been impaled through the stomach area and if she had she wouldn't have lived. It just really was a downer and made it hard to enjoy the rest of the chapter.
schedule
August 21, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Excellent stuff. So rare is there ever such an awesome m/f story for Tomb Raider or Lara Croft. But not only did you do that, you did it with Duke Nukem. Duke and Lara sexually taming each other is awesome! And it looks to be a series ala your DoA: Koibito story. That's even more awesome. Keep up the great work, and more updates soon please.
schedule
August 21, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Chapter 2 was even more excellent. Sort of sad to hear that Lara was barren. I hope this expedition can somehow cure that ailment of hers. I think its sort of nice how she and Duke are growing to like each other. I find both Duke and Lara incredibly likable in this story and Lara is actually reluctantly attracted to a macho-wacho type like Duke. Duke's a borderline stereotype but he's still a good guy and I guess Lara sees that and likes it.
The sex scene in chapter 2 was a huge improvement over the first one and I'm very much looking forward to more. It seems that Croft has possibly mis-read the hiroglyphs and what they are doing could destroy the world? Hope it doesn't get that far. But looking forward to more and if you plan on crossing this fic over with some other video game series or characters much like you so brilliantly worked in so many game characters with your DoA fic series. So far the chemistry from Duke and Lara is fantastic.
The sex scene in chapter 2 was a huge improvement over the first one and I'm very much looking forward to more. It seems that Croft has possibly mis-read the hiroglyphs and what they are doing could destroy the world? Hope it doesn't get that far. But looking forward to more and if you plan on crossing this fic over with some other video game series or characters much like you so brilliantly worked in so many game characters with your DoA fic series. So far the chemistry from Duke and Lara is fantastic.
schedule
August 9, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Haha! Nice! Damn, Tycho, all yo shit is GOLD.
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August 7, 2009 at 12:00 AM
Loved this story. My only very slight criticism would be maybe to describe just a bit more of the detail: especially of Lara's amazing body. But otherwise can't fault a thing. Please, please, please write more of Lara and Duke!
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August 3, 2009 at 12:00 AM
An interesting crossover story, I'm actually surprised with all the sexy women in the Duke Nukem games no ones made a story with him like this, but i have to say him and Laura Croft is a unique thing. But I'm not sure if this was just a one shot or will you continue with this? I mean there is bound to be friction between them but also sexual tension as well. Plus I wonder what the sex will be like when they are both really into it and not kind of doing it just to get the job done.