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July 14, 2008 at 12:00 AM
You seem to have uploaded Chapter three again, was it an accident or is it just a revised version? I have only read the first few paragraphs so it might be my mistake.
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July 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Nice writing! The characters are very deeply portrayed, and the description is very thoughtful. Totally enjoyed reading it through.
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July 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Great story. Loved the game and your writing does it justice, as well as give plentiful and accurate anecdotes that go back to the inspiration. Hope you continue the story, I'd love to keep reading it.
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July 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Ummm I have only one MAJOR problem with your story. There is no way a Jetski can travel from Spain to the USA. There is an ocean between those 2 places! You may want to reassess that part of your story.
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July 5, 2008 at 12:00 AM
PS: For the record your story is a very well written, minues that one problem I mentioned.
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July 4, 2008 at 12:00 AM
Great story, I love it and can't wait for future chapters. I came across the first two chapters a few days ago, and am ashamed to admit I was to lazy to review (I'm making up for it now though) despite the fact that I very much enjoyed reading them. I can't wait to see where the story goes from here.
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June 27, 2008 at 12:00 AM
This is really good, the emotional entanglements between the two are brought out very well indeed. Please continue!
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June 25, 2008 at 12:00 AM
aaahhhh, it was good! loved ashley's thought process!