rate_review Reviews

Amazing story, luff.

More of a plot may need to be developed, of course, in order to make this story succeed, but otherwise it was amazing. The two characters, Joe and Tyler, they seemed to be very similar, but there was a present but invisible air of difference between them, which created a great deal of joy in my raw little soul--being one to gulp down yaoi and m// like an alcoholic does vodka, I took great, great pleasure in reading this story. Please write more, write heavier, stay amazing but improve, and keep to their already colorful personalities.

Did you rework the ending? That's heaps better, takes out the guess work. I can't wait to see where this goes!

hmm, I'm very curious as to who this third player is, as well as the reasons why Tyler was ducking away from his boyfriend so quickly. constructively, I guess I'd say that it would help to have a little backstory for the two at some point, or at least some more physical description, ya know? does Joe have a beard, hair color, varying heights and weights and stuff like that. interesting promise of tension though, especially for the first chapter.

Awwwww *bawls* that's so romantic! They are soul mates and now they've had a spat? well, if they are going to become enemies now, they are going to be mean as hell with each other, love and hate being two sides of a coin and all that. This is a great start, I loved the touch about the blanket they made together. I can't wait to see how this pans out!