rate_review Reviews

Okay first this story is loooong and I read it in less then a day. . . I have to say it was a great story to keep me interested. In a way I kinda wish Rang did get the angel gene in the game would have made things a ton more interesting. I love the characters and how they gradually changed. It's nice when people take things slow and let the romance flow and not just rush it. Great story! Now I have to get some freaking sleep!

I read chapter one and I thought it was pretty cool.
>__> I can't read chapter two, though.
Format fail?
;____;

Up through 27! I just wanted to point out a few things that I really liked. You're just great at writing some of those lines that just.. STICK. Such as in chapter 25, the whole bit about how it was different (for Hwoarang) to touch Jin with an open hand instead of a closed fist, which I just really adored. It's a great comment on how their relationship is progressing - even if, at first, both Jin and Hwoarang have reasons for being reluctant. And chapter 26, where Jin says something along the lines of, even though Hwoarang wasn't Jun's first choice, he was Jin's first choice? WEROIFFUC I turned into a puddle. XD

Chapter 27 was a nice aside for some quality time with the two, despite the fact that both Angel and Devil are starting to make their presence known. I enjoy seeing the playful side of Jin, and you are still amazing with your imagery of Yakushima. I can really almost see it - it sounds lovely! And... I have images of Hwoarang being George of the Jungle, now. XD "Watch out for that tree!" Oh god. I almost wanted to smack Jin for pushing Hwoarang away at first, but.. who can blame him? Things are progressing nicely, though. I understand how you just think SOMETHING is off with what you wrote, but you can't figure out what... To me, though, this chapter seems really good. The flow is nice, even if maybe the very beginning is a little forced? But it really doesn't detract at all, so.. It's all good. ^_^

After getting back in the groove, reading the chapters are becoming quite addictive again. ^_^; I like being able to see the aftermath of that crazy battle, and their stay at the bed and breakfast. Though I do like angst filled chapters, heavy with unspoken issues.. I do also really like happy fun time, too. ^_^ Their brief respite at the town is great, and there are so many good lines. I also like the imagery of Hwoarang being stuck with a small pink towel after a shower. Oh, poor guy, why do I like seeing you in awkward situations so much? XD And Jin in a woman's pants.. priceless. I didn't think Hwoarang was so forward as to smack his ass like that! Heh. I like the imagery in the Devil/Angel dream, where they're the red moon and the white sun, and Hwoarang kind of pulls Jin back from the darkness. I don't know if I'm misunderstanding Hwoarang's leg injury, but it seems like he shouldn't be training quite yet... ^_^; But, boys will be boys, I suppose.
Leave it to Hwoarang to prove he's tough by hiking through the forest. I particularly like the line where, once Jin swears about how he doesn't know the whole damn island, Hwoarang says, "Oh, fuck Kazama, you know how I get when you swear like that." SUCH a Hwoarang thing to say. XD
The flow of the story is really great, so far as I've been reading. Great job!

..er. Sorry for the long review. >_>

Woohoo, I'm back into the swing of things! You were right, around 20 was where I stopped. Chapter 21 was the first one I read that I didn't read before I stopped. Also.. I'm remembering how much I really adore this story! Despite most of this chapter (21) being a fight scene, I didn't find myself getting bored at ALL, which tends to happen in some fics where they drag the battle on forever. I was actually on the edge of my seat for some of it, because I was genuinely worried about what was going to happen next. Your fight scenes are really really well done! ^_^ I enjoyed your description of when Hwoarang was going inside of Jin's body to feel out Devil and Jin's soul, and all the talk of his and Angel's soul merging. I'd say that I was really upset you ended the chapter that way, but... Well, I can just go on to the next chapter. And the next twenty after that. Haha. Great job!

And here I was, thinking no chapter could be more epic than 43, but... damn! After reading this, I feel like I need to get some rest too after all that fighting! Although I know what you mean, once you get this finished, that means I won't have to check up on this story for new updates anymore... Seems sad, but at the same time I am sort of waiting for the ending, but kind of hoping it's still far away! Aaargh! x)

Whoo! Thank you for the double chapters! I'm looking forward to how you're going to write more of the tournament, since usually (however odd it may be) it's rarely mentioned in fan works... x)

Oh, there is one thing I'd like to nitpick about. D: (Just 1 thing in all the chapters up so far! Not bad! lol) You seem to misspell the word "cue" in some places. I checked on several dictionaries and the explanation is this:
CUE: A signal, such as a word or action, used to prompt another event in a performance, such as an actor's speech or entrance, a change in lighting, or a sound effect. A stimulus, either consciously or unconsciously perceived, that elicits or signals a type of behavior. A long tapered rod with a leather tip used to strike the cue ball in billiards and pool.

QUEUE: A line of waiting people or vehicles.

Thus, "she gave him the queue to get in" would be incorrect and 'cue' should be used. Sorry, I just can't help wanting to make great stories even better. D:

Wow. I sat and read all 32 chapters in two sittings (had to go sleep and then to school in the middle, lol!) and ... well, I think that should be enough to tell you how good your story is! D: Now there are two stories I'm stalking on this site (the other one being MMishima's latest ^^) and ... and... wow. D: Awesome story so far! You have me stumped on words. XD

This story wins at life!