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October 19, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Never seen Cloud and Sora together. I have to admit, that was pretty hot. If you write more with CxS I will so read them! ^_^
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September 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I know that I've reviewed this before but I just randomly noticed that you said Riku was putting his fingers into Sora in the middle of the lemon... just thought you should know. And I still like it... but I've said that before...
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September 23, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Woah, hot and with a plot! Well done!
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September 21, 2005 at 12:00 AM
angel, dear, you should consider a serious edit of the following paragraph. if you don't catch the problem when you read it, try it out loud. it made you sound very silly. this is the paragraph:
"Sora bit at his lip but kept himself relaxed, knowing he had to let Cloud stretch him out and not being relaxed would only make it harder. The first few couple of thrusts with his finger hurt but soon pleasure began to override the pain. Another finger was added to stretch him further, the blonde's fingers scissoring the tight ring until he thought the brunette stretched enough."
anyway, you're such a great writer that i didn't want you sounding like an idiot or anything. i liked the story very much otherwise, tho.
eerian
"Sora bit at his lip but kept himself relaxed, knowing he had to let Cloud stretch him out and not being relaxed would only make it harder. The first few couple of thrusts with his finger hurt but soon pleasure began to override the pain. Another finger was added to stretch him further, the blonde's fingers scissoring the tight ring until he thought the brunette stretched enough."
anyway, you're such a great writer that i didn't want you sounding like an idiot or anything. i liked the story very much otherwise, tho.
eerian
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August 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
that was really good! I like the Sora and Cloud pairing.. you wrote it really well and the lemon was hot!
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August 28, 2005 at 12:00 AM
I loved this! You're an excellent writer. Is this just a one-shot, or are you going to add more chapters? Keep writing! :D
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August 25, 2005 at 12:00 AM
Haha a visit to a club? What kind? Lolz. Good story! I enjoyed reading your little..scene with great interest! Is this your first time writing? Cause if it is..it is done really well! But there humping could've been a little longer and more detialed. Other then that you did pretty okay. You should continue writing more stories! You'll make a great writer! lolz. Cloud and Sora pairings aren't common as much so I just have to give you propz for not making it a Riku and Sora couple ^^
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August 25, 2005 at 12:00 AM
::claps hands:: Yay! Sora and Cloud smut...very good smut. There is so very little Cloud on Sora action that I must request that you make another wonderful story!
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August 24, 2005 at 12:00 AM
why the hell has no1 else reviewed this?! i mean come on. sora X cloud stories are frickin' hot. this had a nice feel to it and the structure was pretty good. the only problem only i saw was the line that said "The blonde needed to be deeply sunk in Sora soon...." i think that could have been worded a bit better. but besides that, lovely work. looking foward to reading more works from you. ^__^