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June 16, 2006 at 12:00 AM
Awesome idea....I loved the concept...it's very unique...also I liked the descriptions...the way you used the words to make up the story....you shouldn't let yourself down on this fic...to my opinion it's really good...good job^^
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October 15, 2004 at 12:00 AM
*is soooo amused* I like this story. I was quite interesting, and a bit humorous, though I have a rather sick sence of humor. I was good though. Nice writing style and good idea to boot. ^^ Good job.
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March 11, 2004 at 12:00 AM
beautifully-woven story. liked the way the forbidden-fruit idea was tied in with Kain's methodical blasphemy.
more could have been said about the act of defiling the crypt instead of physically describing it. perhaps a mental dimension could be added? like the exploration of Kain's thoughts during the process? this would serve to enrich the defiling scene and evoke a stronger sense of hatred/vengeance/sardonicism.
overall, a pleasure to read.
more could have been said about the act of defiling the crypt instead of physically describing it. perhaps a mental dimension could be added? like the exploration of Kain's thoughts during the process? this would serve to enrich the defiling scene and evoke a stronger sense of hatred/vengeance/sardonicism.
overall, a pleasure to read.
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March 11, 2004 at 12:00 AM
^^^ I'm going to take your suggestion seriously. I can't begin to thank you enough for your kind criticism! You're right about Kain's perspective. I should have smoremore. The story is really about him (err.. me?! ^_^;;).
Thank you anyone who has read it and enjoyed it! Expect a better draft coming in!
Thank you anyone who has read it and enjoyed it! Expect a better draft coming in!
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March 6, 2004 at 12:00 AM
A bit sick, but very good! I'm so gald I found this!
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March 6, 2004 at 12:00 AM
I Love this story!! Kain and Raziel forever!! hee hee, I would have liked it even better if there was some more love and passion though ^^ Please write more!!!!!